Top 20 Nude Scenes of 2005

Now that they've spread out all the bowl games, the annual list of nude scenes is the only New Year's tradition really worth honoring

• Pictorial results

• Numerical results

Rampage (2006)

I guess Brittany Daniel must have known the competition was stiff in 2005, so she postponed her big nude scene until the New Year. (The actual street date is January 10). Here she is in Rampage, the latest take on the Hillside Strangler affair. The caps are taken from these two DIVX .avis (1, 2). WARNING: the second clip is 28 meg, a monster for those of you without broadband.

Brittany Daniel

Other Crap:

Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.

"Hotel Exotica"

Hotel Exotica (1998) -- What do you get when you take all of the simulated sex and most of the nudity out of a soft core? Hotel Exotica. This film is supposed to run 88 minutes, but this "Directors Cut" DVD version is only 71 minutes. So what was in the additional 17 minutes? All of the simulated sex, including a purportedly sizzling girl/girl scene between Ahmo Hight and Taylor St. Claire, and most of the nudity. Ahmo Hight, Landon Hall and Gal Lawrence show breasts and buns, and Nikki Fritz, in a 9 second scene probably recycled from another film, shows breasts.

After this castration, the film is mostly very boring relationship talk. Hall is the unsatisfied wife of a workaholic lawyer. In hopes of revitalizing their relationship, she books a weekend at the Hotel Exotica. When he bows out, she goes anyway, taking her sister, Ahmo Hight, who has just discovered her boyfriend cheating with Nikki Fritz. Her husband and his partner show up after all when the client they were working hard for drops them. Eventually, Hall and her hubby get together, and Hight and the partner become an item. Taylor St. Claire plays the resident psychic, but all of her nudity was cut. Gal Lawrence, as the hostess fo the hotel, does a mild dom thing with the partner.

IMDb readers have this at 4.1, but some of the higher scores came from people who viewed the uncut version rather than the DVD director's cut. It is easy to see from the comments which version each person watched. The only reviewer also despises this version. The transfer is clearly done from a VHS version, and is grainy and mushy. Avoid this at all costs. E.

Ahmo Hight Gal Lawrence Landon Hall Nikki Fritz

First of all I wish our founding father, Uncle Scoopy, his gang and of course each and every one of you a Happy New Year.

And let us start 2006 with a Fun House regular of whom we've hadn't clips before, if my memory serves me right. Asia Argento is no stranger to this page and today we'll uncover her in 10 clips from B. Monkey (1998). If you download all the clips you'll get more about 7 minutes of Asia in various degrees of undress.

If you want to know more about this movie, please read Scoop's review in the Movie House

• Asia Argento (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

Hollywood Sins (2000) is an exuberant erotic drama with more than a little to entertain. I will get to the details tomorrow. But for now let us consider she who is somtimes known as Mia Zottoli, other times as Ava Lake, occasionally as just plain Mia, once as Ava Niche (apparently to fill a niche market) and twice as Phyllisha. IMDb has her in 36 movies of one sort or another, a few videotapes and several titty-cable shows. Spiffy.

There is no rhyme and no reason to Mia’s change of names. She started out in 1997 as Mia but broke out with a vengeance in 1999 with at least seven direct-to-video productions. Sometimes she was still Mia but sometime in 1999 she took on the name of Ava Lake. In all the 1999 productions (e.g. Forbidden Highway, Carnal Desire and Hot Club California) and in several dated 2000 (Diary of Lust and Hollywood Sins) she sported a nice, natural body. Mia has long legs, narrow hips and killer abs. She once had hooties that were not Jennifer Connely’s, to say the least, but were just fine thank you. But starting with Last Lane to Vegas (2000) and for productions thereafter Mia displayed an enhanced superstructure. Enhanced in terms of size. Quality is another question.

In Mia’s career she has played a stripper a half-dozen times, done at least that number of lesbo scenes and sport-humped her way through one picture after another. I more than sorta like her. When her hair was long her large eyes and athletic figure made for some impressive scenery. Nowhere is that truer than in Hollywood Sins. She is at her most attractive in this movie, and for that reason I capped the living bejeebers out of her scenes...two sport-humpin with a guy, one muff-diving with Kim Dawson and one post-coital scene in which she wander around fully frontally nekkid. Good stuff.

There is one interview of Mia online in which the one critical question (Why the name changes, dearie?) was never asked. One very good question was asked-- does she feel the competition for screen time and extreme body exposure that has happened with the introduction of so many pornstars in erotic movies? Her claim is that she feels no competition because she is moving on to other, more mainstream adventures. Uh huh. She was in nothing last year and except for an episode of Boston Public in 2001, when she played a stripper, there is not much sign of movement to anything outside DTV and titty cable erotic productions. She might have also reminded the questioner of her performance in Hollywood Sins, because in this movie Mia shows absolutely, positively everything. The gynocam comes out a couple of times. She are talking legs spread mighty wide. Even the protocam makes an appearance as Mia’s boyfriend grabs her cheeks and spreads em. Not one inch left covered and unexposed.

Well, because Mia looks as good as she ever would in this movie and because she gives up such major goodies I grabbed over 200 frames and put the best of em together in 23 collages. Took me forever. Kinda worth it, though.

Mia Zottoli "Hollywood Sins"