Coffy (1973) stars Pam Grier as Nurse Coffin (or Coffy). When her baby sister is turned into a near vegetable by bad dope, and a cop who is a best friend is killed, she swears revenge. This is one mean babe when riled. She uses everything from a shotgun to razor blades in her hair to wreak havoc with "Italian Businessmen," black hoods, and a bunch of hookers in one of the better cat fights ever filmed. Pam knows exactly what to do in a cat fight -- expose your opponents' breasts.

We have Pam nude in several scenes, most of them dark, but there is one long scene of her undressing in a well-lit bedroom. Several other women showed breasts including Lisa Farringer, Linda Haynes, Leslie McRay, and several unknowns. Even the photo girl in a night club gets her top torn off. This is exploitation the way it is meant to be. The video transfer on this was abysmal, but the special features include full length commentary. Maltin prefers this original mean Mama revenge story to Foxy Brown, which came out the next year, and awards 2 1/2 stars. IMDB readers have 6.8/10, which is about right.

Mother and Son - as you guys know, I watch a lot of really off-the-wall movies, in search of the perfect patch of flesh, or even the perfect film. Normally, when there is no nudity, I don't write up any comments unless it's one of those movies everyone has heard of, like "When Harry Met Sally", or if it's so bad I can make fun of it. This one is neither. It is a Tarkovsky clone from Russia, perhaps the most pretentious movie ever made, and I had to let off some steam.

Mystic Pizza is a cutesy film aimed at the teen female market, and it more or less kicked off Julia Roberts' career. Julia looked great. That hair, that face! A watchable chick-flick, but no nudity.

I'll write up Sirens tomorrow, for now let me just say this. Portia de Rossi and Tara Fitzgerald stark naked full frontal, in perfect lighting, clearly photographed. And tomorrow's collages will include Elle Macpherson, same statements apply. WARNING: although all collages are Depardieu-free, Hugh Grant can be seen in the ones of Tara Fitzgerald. Some of the most beautiful work I've ever done, in my opinion.

De Rossi (1, 2, 3, 4)

Fitzgerald (1, 2)

To answer Sisyphus' "What the F*** Part 2" on 1/14, the woman is former supermodel {mid-90s} Mystee.

On 1/15, Adriane Galisteau is referred to as "a hot Brazilian babe". True enough, but she's most renowned for being the fiancee of race car Formula One driving legend Ayrton Senna, when he was killed in a crash. So now, one presumes, her sex life is mostly auto erotic {sorry}.

Sara St. James, who has made quite a few appearances lately {the blonde Jennifer Connelly?}, has become a born-again Christian. Not only won't she take my calls anymore {she used to telephone me sobbing at 2 a.m.--why can't these California starlets fathom the three-hour time difference?}, but she's now dedicating to "producing Christian films." Does that mean they star Slater, Brando or Fletcher?

As you've probably been told by now, Colleen Fitzpatrick--who's topless briefly in Dracula 2000--is better known these days as the hot rap songstress "Vitamin C". Orange you glad I'm here to tell you this stuff?

-Celebrity Sleuth

Michelle Clack is a major British babe with a killer arse who, sad to say, decided the whole world would be happier if she sported larger breasts. She was wrong; and Mother Nature had been so generous to her already. (1, 2)

Nadia Bengala is a former Miss Italy; typical of her country she is one great lookin' babe Got off the plane from Rome one morning after a 20 hour trip from LA; first person I spotted as I left customs was so the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Nearly broke my neck staring at her as she went by, and she gave me this smile that said if I were a whole lot better looking she would be impressed, but she was grateful for the compliment anyway.

And then there was the paparazzi pic I sent in a while back of Daisy Fuentes in a nice green blouse. Someone out there in cyber-land had more of the same outfit and several of a nice black dress slit down to Daisy's waist. Worked with the scans a bit and here they are. (1, 2, 3)

Margaret Siegel is the first stewardess. Cute. Reminds me a little bit of Dolly Read ("Ladies and Gentlemen! I'd like to present to you...THE Carrie Nation!") She was going to screw this really old Swiss guy she just met on the plane but he fell asleep in the hotel room. But no problemo, here comes the room service guy. Ass.

Kind of a weird collection of caps of her face and other body parts, including a little boob.

I love Ingrid Steeger. Well, I love the Ingrid Steeger of 1971. Hot little piece of ass. I've said it before and I'll say it again, in 1971, the German (and Swiss, Swedish, Austrian...Northern Europeans I guess) chicks had nice athletic bodies with small tight asses. Look at your French, Italian, British or American flicks of the same time and you see what? Flabby asses. Not that I'm blaming the ladies, except for Northern Europe, the ladies of the world pretty much had flabby butts in those days before Tae Bo. Here's Ingrid's sweet toned ass and perky tits taking a bath with some dorky looking Swiss guy.

Eveline Traeger's another one of the airline bimbos. Naked changing clothes.

Eveline again getting a ready to take a bath. Her ass is a bit more international flavored.

And here's Eveline running down the hallway full frontal naked like. Big international bush.

Eveline's tits. Really cute face, I think.

Ingrid Steeger getting felt up on the couch. Ingrid and Eveline and two guys are watching some porn on a film projector (remember those?). The cool thing is...the film in the background is far nastier than the one we're watching, which is the one that was projected on drive-in screens across the US in the 70s. There's two gals munching each other and giving some guy a double blow job. An R-rated movie with an X-rated flick playing in the background. How subversive.

Eveline's beau wants to check out the bush country. Best dialogue in the flick correlates with the last frame: "Hmmm....I would've thought that you'd be a natural blonde." Eveline laughs "Haven't you heard? All that glitters is not gold!" He he. Yup, that was the best line.

Ingrid's getting screwed on a swingset gimmick .This was very hard to cap. Thankfully I am familiar with the concepts of apogee and perigee and that's what you see here. I got to thinking...either this guys got a three foot dick or his aim is beyond excellent.

Last and perhaps least, Kathrin Heberle meets this extremely goofy Howard Stern/Gene Simmons lovechild (except taller, skinnier and uglier if you can believe it) and is charmed by his communist revolutionary rhetoric. She returns with him back to his pad where he lives with his commune of Baader-Meinhof wannabes and fucks the lot of them beneath the Che Guevera and Chairman Mao posters. All we got to see were some tits though.

I need a little help from the Fun House viewers. Do you know who Isabelle Fortea is? She's supposed to have been born in Paris and raised in Spain, speaks six languages and was involved with little Jean-Claude Van Damme. I wouldn't vouch for that though, she sounds like a chick from Cali to me. Anyway...she is ungodly hot. Skinny, long red hair, big eyes, big lips and big boobs. There's a pic in the Naked Encyclopedia, check it out. She appeared in one of those Marilyn Chambers R rated movies (Bikini Bistro) and also in Affairs of the Heart, a Private Screenings release. I've got those...but I KNOW she was in a movie about a big ol' studly country bumpkin who moved to the Big Apple and moved into an apartment with his sophisticated cousin who just happens to live next door to these three hot chickees, one of which was Ms Fortea. I've been looking for the name of this flick forever, even wrote Private Screenings but they never answered me (bastards) and so would appreciate it if anyone out there could I.D. this flick. Please email me at fortea@runmongoose.com or email the Scoopys.

Thanks!