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Munich (2005):
Munich is a very serious movie which requires a great deal of
thought and consideration, so I can't write about it in this context.
The stills below will give you the impression that the scene is
sort of sexy, which it most certainly is not. Watch the film clip (zipped
.wmv, 16 meg but worth it), which demonstrates how brilliantly the
scene is realized, and how much advance thought went into it.
Some other film clips (not mine):
Updates:
There are about fifty new individual volumes in
section B of the Encyclopedia, thus adding about 550 new images.
Mailbox:
Scoop
Jennifer Coolidge of "American Pie" and
"Joey" fame attended a couple of movie premieres in 2003, including
the one for "Legally Blonde 2," wearing very sheer black tops that
left little if anything to the imagination. If anyone has quality
examples of these, please post them.
3finger
--------------
Scoop:
In "Forbidden Games" (Tuna's section, Monday
edition), that's not Ashley Rhey. That's Aleksandra Kaniak.
Other Crap:
200 pound pussy missing
- Police seek warrant to search Roseanne Barr's house
New event at the Winter Olympics: Norwegian moose surfing.
- There are, one must admit, severe repercussions to
global warming, but the planet-strangling heat also has
its positive side. Soon there will be no more Winter
Olympics.
- I'm really gonna miss that thing where they ski for
a while, then stop to bag some elk, then ski some more,
then stop to write a saga about Odin, then ski some
more. How do they score that thing? Does grammar count
in the saga portion? "Sorry, Bjørn, you were the fastest
skier, but you had the wrong angle on those lines
through your "ø's"
The musical collaboration we've been waiting for.
Forget Brecht and Weill. Forget Lennon and McCartney
Michael Jackson and Pope John Paul 2 - together at last
The Fantastic Four will battle Silver Surfer and his
planet-eating master Galactus.
- That was probably the greatest continuing FF story
ever, but it could be ruined if they decide to make it
too light-weight and jokey. I'm not sure they can get
the right tone with the existing cast, particularly
given the example of the first film.
- I wrote in my review of FF that they should have
just skipped the origin and gone directly to the Silver
Surfer and Galactus. Be careful what you wish for. Now I
guess they will give me a chance to prove what a
complete idiot I am.
- Who could play the introspective, haunted Silver
Surfer? That's a tough one. It needs someone with a
Shakespearian eloquence for long monologues who can
convert a sinister presence to sensitivity. Ralph
Fiennes comes to mind, but I don't think this kind of
movie is his cup of tea, and I can't envision him
spending an entire film wrapped in tinfoil.
The history of
Sexual or Erotic Films, as catalogued by filmsite.org
Rochester Insider presents 40 Obscure Facts about
Rochester, New York's favorite son, Philip Seymour
Hoffman.
- As a fellow native Rochesterian, I tip my hat to
Hoffman for managing to remove most traces of the
dreaded Rochester accent. Other actors to come from
Rochester, like John Lithgow and Robert Forster, can't
hide their broad vowels. I've been gone for thirty years
and still catch myself pronouncing "loft" as if it began
with the "la" sound in "tra-la-la."
- Here's to ya, Phil. I'll eat a "white hot" and drink
a "botla pop" in your name
- (When you ask for a hot dog in Rochester, they ask
"red or white?" God knows why.)
Samuel L. Jackson in "Afro Samurai"
The trailer and Super Bowl spot for Mission:Impossible III
- The web page identifies it as Mission:Impossible III
- Starring Tom Cruise, presumably to keep you from
confusing it with the competing version, Shakespeare's
Mission:Impossible III, which stars Danny Bonaduce
Newsweek's long article about the Titan of Truthiness,
Stephen Colbert
The trailer for Gen, an indie horror film from Turkey
- "In 'Gen,' a newly appointed doctor witnesses a
series of murders in a hospital which no one can reach
due to heavy snow. Everybody is suspicious of each other
and searching for the killer. In three days the
hospital, which has been quiet and peaceful over the
years, faces a terror that turns nightmares into
reality."
An estimated 90.7 million people watched the Pittsburgh
Steelers beat the Seattle Seahawks Sunday
- 57% of all TVs in Pittsburgh were tuned in. That's
not 57% of the ones on, but 57% of all of them,
including the ones off.
- I wonder that the percentage was in Austin during
the Rose Bowl.
George Clooney does impressions of Groucho Marx with his
penis.
- Clooney and I should so hang out. My penis does a
great impersonation of George Fenneman.
Bid to smuggle out cockle spat foiled
- Unbeknownst to the rest of the world, Malaysia has
been developing a critical cockle spat shortage
This is a real headline:
"Karate experts hired to control marauding parrots in New
Zealand"
- No more parrot poop on my classic T-Bird? Thank you,
Chuck Norris.
When hip-hop guys have a video shoot, they take the
"shoot" part very seriously.
Mitch Hedberg Video Gallery!
- The strange, nervous comic died last year, still in
his 30s.
Will Virginia Madsen be the new Indiana Jones babe?
- We've been praising Virginia since the beginning of
time, so it's nice to see the world finally coming
around. It's amazing that it's taken her twenty years to
become a real star.
A nice collection of comedy videos from Milk and Cookies
Reese Witherspoon Early Favorite to Win Most Annoying
Celebrity Award
White House Staff Hit Hard By Human-Animal Hybrid Ban
Every Super Bowl XL Commercial, hosted on Google Video
Clerks II: Growth and gross-outs
CAA DROPS JESUS AS CLIENT ... Cancellation of Book of
Daniel leaves the Messiah without representation
AUTO DEATHS UP 85% IN LOS ANGELES FOLLOWING SUCCESS OF
CRASH ...Angelenos intentionally crashing into each
other in hopes of connection, racial reconciliation
"BUSH CALLS SUPER BOWL A VICTORY IN WAR ON TERROR ...
Claims Link Between Seattle QB and al-Qaeda"
This seems to be a complete collection of SuperBowl
Commercials
Various sexual records
Sexual Averages - the average size of everything
MovieJuice! turns a jaded eye to When a Stranger Calls
Former Penthouse magazine publisher Bob Guccione has lost
his fabled New York mansion for defaulting on a $25
million loan.
Jennifer Aniston has told why she split up from Brad Pitt
- they were too fuckin' HAPPY.
According to this source:
The footage cut from Basic Instinct 2 was an orgy scene. |
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Movie Reviews:
Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format.
Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.
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Eros (2004)
Eros (2004) is a trilogy of supposedly erotic shorts by three
directors, Wong Car Wai, Stephan Soderberg and Michelangelo Antonioni.
The Hand (Wong Car Wai)
A young tailor, Chang Chen, is summoned to the apartments of a
famous courtesan, Gong Li. She orders him to remove his pants, then
fondels him, telling hi that he will never forget her, and will make
beautiful clothes for her. Her approach works, and he is devoted to
her, making all of her gowns. When she begins to run out of looks, and
therefor customers and money, he sticks with her, even to her end,
after sinking to the level of street whore. There is no nudity at all,
every scene is in near darkness, and I saw little of interest, erotic
or not. It is an interesting take on unrequited love, but not one that
I found at all entertaining. I would keep the fast forward handy for
this segment.
Equilibrium (Stephan Soderberg)
We see what we learn is a dream of a woman (Ele Keats) taking a
bath and putting on her make-up nude. We only see Breasts and bush.
Cut to black and white. An ad executive is in a shrink's office,
obsessing over his inability to come up with a sales campaign for
alarm clocks, and also over a toupee a co-working is wearing, and his
dream of the woman. The shrink convinces him to lay down on the couch
and close his eyes, then peers out the office window and sails paper
airplanes out the window while he talks to him. Nonetheless, the
shrink manages to help him. The surprise ending reveals the identity
of the woman in the dream.
Ele Keats shows breasts and bush in the dream sequence.
I also failed to see the eroticism here, and, while Robert Downey
Jr as the patient, and Alan Arkin as the shrink gave good
performances, I did not see the point. Again, this segment, for me,
was a waste of time.
The Dangerous Thread of Things (Michelangelo Antonioni)
As this film opens, Regina Nemni is laying topless in front of a
villa. A man comes out, and it is clear this is the end of an affair.
She puts on a transparent top, and the two do some sightseeing,
finally breaking up standing on a pier. Cut to the man outside a
neighboring villa, and Luisa Ranieri inviting him in. She shows him
the roof, and then goes back in, strips to her panties, masturbates,
and then he comes back inside and the two have sex.
The man leaves for Paris, paving the way for an amazing third act.
We see Luisa Ranieri, completely nude, dancing on the edge of the surf
at length, then laying down on a blanket. Then we see Regina Nemni Do
exactly the same thing. As the film ends, Nemni finds Ranieri, and the
two stare a teach other.
Both women do extended full frontal and rear nudity in bright
sunlight.
The imagery is beautiful here, clearly showing a master's touch. I
am sure those who are fond of finding the symbolism within art will
find fertile ground here, with the two women being an alpha and an
omega with the man connecting the two, and then the beginning and the
end meeting. In fact, I should probably suggest this film to my old
English teachers, as they thrive on the discovery of symbolism. I
don't know from symbolism, but I do recognize eye candy, and this film
makes the entire DVD with the time just for the eye candy alone. I
can't imagine a better visual treat than seeing a completely nude
woman dancing along the surf line in broad daylight, and this film has
two of them. Further, the scenics in the first half of the film are
also wonderful. In terms of plot and pace, this is not much better
than the first two, but makes up for it in visual appeal.
IMDb readers have this at 5.9. It had a short US theatrical release
last April, earning nearly nothing. Ebert awarded three stars, but
despised the Antonioni sequence for precisely the reasons I enjoyed
it, and loved the Wong Car Wai film because he found it so erotic. I
will call the genre foreign erotica, and give this one a C.
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Some clips (zipped divx .avi) of former Hefmate Mercy Rooney (nee Montello)
in Space Things ...
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6)
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We start the new week with Fun House regular Laura Antonelli, the drop-dead
gorgeous all-natural 1970's actress with an exuberant volume in the
Encyclopedia. The occasion is the Italian movie Il merlo maschio (1971; aka.
Secret Fantasy). Il merlo maschio literally translate as The Male Blackbird, but
according to my dictionary merlo also means both smart ass and sucker.
The story, for as much as there is one, deals with an average musician in an
orchestra who is not really popular among his colleagues. When he finds out that
they are more interested in his wife he starts taking nude pictures of her that
accidentally fall into the hands of his band members. Now they do find him
interesting and start to show some respect...That's about it.
As announced yesterday we'll be viewing the final batch of 8 clips featuring
Laura Antonelli in Il Merlo Maschio. We have her naked in several situations,
all more musical than yesterday, including in bed being used as an instrument,
at the doctor's, in a train while on nude display for the workmen...This
finally leads to the grand finale in the last clip, when hubby seems to go
mad. Given the fact that she is out of her clothes so often, it looks like a
small miracle to me that Laura managed to hide bush all the time.
(9,
10,
11,
12,
13,
14,
15,
16) |
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The Last Marshall (1999) is a mediocre cop drama with plenty of shoot-ups
and blood.
Some nice nudity by Natalie McCullough, who
plays a stripper,
and there are some unidentified strippers.
There are a few sexy caps of Lisa Boyle, who is
given a name in the credits but is not named in the film.
Constance Marie is very wet but nothing is
visible.
There's no visible nudity in Never Die alone (2004), although
Jennifer Sky
and Reagon Gomez-Preston do become naked.
  
Amanda Peet takes her top off in The Whole Ten Yards (2004) but
she is facing the other way. We're left with some sexy caps.
   
666 - in Bed with the Devil (2002) is a German comedy that was
actually amusing. No nudity, just lots of underwear, pokies and cleavage by
Claudia Schiffer
 
Verona Feldbusch
Mariella Ahrens
Patricia Lueger
Sonsee Ahray Floetmann
   
Sandra Selig and Dobrawa Czartolinksi.
This Night I'll Possess Your Corpse (1967) is a Brazilian horror film,
with plenty of bodies and boobs. Identifying the actresses was difficult as they
weren't listed with their character names. So, with my best efforts, the
topless and see-through ladies were
Tina Wohlers
    
Nadia Freitas
 
Esmeralda Ruchel
 
Arlette Brazolin
Lya Laguette
 
and Nina Monte
and various unidentifiables
      
Helene Joy is topless in Desolation Sound
(2005).
   
In Predator 2 (1990), which is nowhere as good as the original, we see
a completely naked Teri Weigel.
 
No nudity in the idiotic Bio-Dome (1996), but some lovely pokies by
Joey Adams
 
and Dara Tomanovich.
Some delightful cleavage by Valerie Perrine in
Superman (1976).
  
Some lovely nudity in Bad Company (1995).
A brief crotch-flash by Ellen Barkin
   
Michelle Beaudoin is topless
and there are some sexy caps of Gia Caridis.
 
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Pat's comments in yellow...
Lance Armstrong and Sheryl Crow announced that they have called off their
engagement. Ironically, Crow recently complained that it was hard to be a
celebrity couple because tabloids are rooting for you to break up, and they were
always disappointed every time Crow denied a rumor that they'd split.
* If tabloid editors root for celebrity couples to split
up, they must be deliriously happy all the time.
* She may be lying about breaking up just so she can take it back and dash
their hopes.
* It's not that Sheryl doesn't love Lance, but it turned out he really IS the
world's fastest man...And like the French, she got tired of him always finishing
first.
* But she had a ball before she left.
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