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Today is the venerable Tuna's
100,000th Anniversary.
That means he has now completed the totally incomprehensible number of 100,000
collages.
As you all undoubtedly know, the 100,000th is traditionally known as the
Ytterbium Anniversary, named after the most chronically underrated of the rare
earths, and so Tuna earns an anniversary card postmarked in Ytterby and signed
by many locals with heartfelt messages in their native Ytterbian dialect.
Unfortunately, we have no idea what those messages mean, and the website
Ytterby.com is no help. While offering a quaint postcard picture of their
apparently deserted town during its one annual snow-free day (I presume they
migrate farther north to get in their daily ration of cross-country skiing),
the domain offers no words beyond the admonition that "this site is not yet
active."
Just remember, kids, the National Safety Council reminds you that playing with
Ytterbium can irritate the skin and eyes, so always wear your gloves and
goggles when you lace your snowballs with it, or any of the rare earth
elements.
In order to help us and the quaint denizens of Ytterby celebrate this solemn
occasion of near-religious significance, Tuna has selected one of his favorite
films. His section is a free page today. Here is his advance look (yes,
including the pictures) at the Cinderella Liberty DVD (Available March 6,
2007), starring Marsha Mason.
Oh, before I forget ... Charlie's French Cinema Nudity site is updated, as per the normal Friday routine.
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* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).
* White asterisk: expanded format.
* Blue asterisk: not mine.
No asterisk: it probably sucks.
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OTHER CRAP:
Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles,
here.
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Cinderella Liberty
Cinderella Liberty (1973) is a comic love story about a career sailor who
falls in love with a hooker and becomes a surrogate father to her son. The
source material is the eponymous novel by Darryl Ponicsan about red tape and
bureaucracy in the Navy. When director Mark Rydell was approached by the
studio to make a film of the book, he read it and offered to make a film based
not on the entire book, but on one particular chapter. They took him up on it
and the novelist was hired to do his own adapted screenplay. Cinderella
Liberty's lonely sailor was played by James Caan opposite a then unknown
Marsha Mason.
1973 was the year of Darryl Ponicsan. In a strange twist of fate, he had
not one but two Navy-themed novels made into movies in that very same year:
his own adaptation of Cinderella Liberty and Robert Towne's adaptation of The
Last Detail. Each was nominated for three Oscars (no winners):
Cinderella Liberty |
The
Last Detail |
Best Actress (Marsha Mason) |
Best Actor (The Joker) |
Best Musical Score (John
Williams) |
Best Supporting Actor (Cousin
Eddie) |
Best Original Song (John
William, Paul Williams) |
Best Adapted Screenplay (Robert
Towne) |
Synopsis:
Caan arrives in Seattle, and is transferred to the local Naval hospital
for a pilonidal cyst. It turns out that the cyst doesn't need medical
treatment, but red tape prevents him from getting back to his ship in time
to leave with it. To add insult to injury, a frustrated Caan is given a
Cinderella Liberty card. For those who have never been in the Navy,
Cinderella Liberty means that you must be back before midnight lest you turn
into a pumpkin, like Cinderella. It is usually imposed on low level
personnel, certainly not a first class bosun's mate with over 12 years of
service. He does what any good sailor would do: heads to a bar, and tries to
get lucky. He ends up hustling Marsha Mason at pool -- $50 against her body.
Caan wins. At her poverty-level apartment, he discovers that she has an 11
year old black son, and is a terrible mother. This is not a situation he
relishes.
Back on the base, he finds out that his pay records have been lost, and
is sent to transit barracks. To make matters worse, he still doesn't get
liberty, but is stuck on shore patrol, also known as SP duty (often called
Short Peters). Of course when he finally does get a night off, he has no
money because of the payroll mix-up. Hanging out an amusement park, he finds
Marsha Mason's son on a roller coaster, drinking beer and swearing. Caan
decides to take the kid under his wing, and this leads to Caan and Mason
getting back together. Things do not proceed smoothly. She is pregnant, the
Navy won't recognize their marriage, they lose their welfare, and Caan's pay
records are still missing.
He has only one stroke of luck. In an important sub-plot, he is
continually searching for his boot camp company commander to get even with
him. He finally finds his nemesis, who is in transit being discharged
against his will. After punching him in the jaw, Caan discovers that he
shares a lot of memories and more than a little affection with this company
commander, played by Eli Wallach.
IMDb readers say 6.5. Ebert wasn't impressed and only awarded two stars.
His complaint was that the story was simply not believable. Obviously, Roger
was never in the Navy. There were some small problems caused by the fact that
the US government didn't approve of the project and refused to help. For
example, the director had to rent a Canadian Navy ship and repaint it. And
there were some very minor technical errors. For example, Caan's rank is
called "first class bosun's mate." A real sailor would say "BM 1," or "deck
ape first" in colloquial speech. Officially, it would be "bosun's mate first
class," not "first class bosun's mate."
Those are small matters. Apart from such minutiae, the film had almost
everything both correct and credible.
Some might doubt that a sailor would marry a pregnant hooker with an
illegitimate kid. There was a woman in Oakland, and not a very attractive one
at that, who was known as Seventh Fleet Sally. Sailors, not the most PC people
in the world at the time, used to say that kissing her was like blowing the
whole Seventh Fleet by proxy. She had been married to many sailors. Also, a
friend of mine met a pregnant girl at a party, humped her on the stairs, and
ended up marrying her. They had to hide this fact from the Navy, because
sailors holding a rank of E3 or lower were not allowed to marry without
permission from the Navy.
Again, to someone who has never been in the service, the idea of missing
pay records being a problem sounds strange. In fact, it was not uncommon. In
the Navy there are three groups of enlisted men you try to stay friends with.
Cooks, corpsmen and personnelmen.
- Cooks, because they can see to it that your food is not palatable, and
also because they can do you special favors.
- Corpsmen, because they can give you assistance in getting medical care.
I once traded a canned ham for an appointment for oral surgery to have my
wisdom teeth removed. They film also incorporated a friendly corpsman, who
arranged dental work for Mason's son.
- Personnelmen, because they have the most power over you of all. They can
lose your personal and pay records, often by dropping them behind file
cabinets. At that point, you cease to exist and receive no pay for months.
There is no hint in this film that it was intentional, but such things were
not at all uncommon.
The basic idea of a poor woman hanging around a Navy town hoping to marry a
sailor and gain dependent status for her and her kids is also very
true-to-life, because that means commissary privileges, medical care and an
allotment. When their husbands were at sea, they often became "seventh fleet
widows," which meant they screwed around with whoever was in port. Lest you
feel sorry for the husbands, they had no shortage of female companionship on
R&R in places like Subic Bay, Yokosuka and Hong Kong.
In other words, this script is very authentic, obviously written by someone
who has been there.
Darryl Ponicsan also did an amazing job on the dialogue, which included
lines like:
Base commander Lynn Forshay, when asked if he had ever been in love: "I
tell you Baggs, I don't believe I have. That's because I happen to be one of
those incurable romantics. Every time I meet a girl, I expect to hear a clap
of thunder. I never heard the thunder, but I occasionally did get the clap."
Bosun's mate John Baggs Jr.: "Would you call yourself a "Champagne
cocktail-sippin', cock-teasin', downtown barroom whore?"
Maggie Paul: "Second generation"
The script was supported by outstanding execution as well. The acting was
amazing. Marsha Mason garnered her first of four Oscar nominations for this
performance, and won the first of two Golden Globes. Caan and Wallach were
also fantastic, but that is no surprise. Newcomer Kirk Calloway was brilliant
as the hardened young son with deep feelings just beneath the surface. The
cinematography was done by none other than Vilmos Zsigmond, and was typical of
his outstanding work. Music was composed by John Williams, and the song's
lyrics were written by Paul Williams. It is no surprise that Mark Rydell
produced and directed this fine film. It is not the only one of his that I
have admired. He was responsible for The Rose, For the Boys, and On Golden
Pond. I love all three, and On Golden Pond would be in my list of the top 100
of all time.
Although The Last Detail has emerged over time as Darryl Ponicsan's most
highly regarded film project, and beats Cinderella Liberty 7.5 to 6.5 at IMDb,
there is reason to believe that Cinderella Liberty was actually considered the
better film in 1973. Although they fought to an Oscar stand-still with three
nominations and no wins, Cinderella Liberty was the overwhelming favorite at
the Golden Globes. While The Last Detail received only the two acting
nominations for Nicholson and Quaid (with no wins), Cinderella Liberty
received five nominations including best screenplay, and the Big Kahuna
itself, best picture - drama. Four of its nominations were also-rans, but
Marsha Mason won outright for her performance.
Obviously, this is exactly my kind of film. It talks about things I have
personal experience at, and does so very believably. The entire film was shot
in Seattle, a place where I spent a lot of time during my Navy years. If
it is your kind of film, as it is mine, they don't get much better.
It is a C+ on our scale, but one of my favorite films.
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Comme t'y es belle
Comme t'y es belle is a whimsical but at the same time not
unserious portrait of the friendship of four Sephardic Jewish women in
Paris. Isa (Michèle Laroque) is a bitchy blonde beauty shop owner
whose heart melts for a financial wizard - a British biker
she has the good sense to run over with her SUV. She is also preparing
a partnership registration with her immigrant housekeeper, who keeps
her house tidy and her kids up-to-date with their homework. Isa's
sister Alice (Valérie Benguigui) is going through a rough patch with
her couch potato husband (Alexandre Astier), but is soothed by the
pleasant presence of the single father (Thierry Neuvic) of a
schoolmate of her children. Pampered heiress Léa (Aure Autika) cannot
forget her ex but should. The youngest of the club, ditzy brunette
Nina (Géraldine Nakache), is looking for ways to lose weight and gain
a boyfriend, preferably the sleazy Adonis Simon (Davide Kammenos) who
has a heart of gold, or so she thinks.
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Sherrybaby
"I'll suck your dick if you give me the job I want". That line, by star
Maggie Gyllenhaal, serves to illustrate the problems faced by newly
paroled prisoner Sherry in this 2006 drama. After serving three years in
prison for stealing to support her drug habit, Sherry is clean and trying
to make a life for herself and re-bond with her young daughter, but there
are many obstacles.
Sherry has to deal with a strict parole officer, her brother and his
wife who are caring for the daughter and have become so possessive they
told the child not to call her Mommy, a father who seems to have an
unhealthy affection for his daughter, plus all the additional problems
that we all face in everyday life.
Sherry tries to cope with all the problems and avoid getting
re-involved with drugs by attending meetings, and she is getting strength
and support from a man whom she met at a meeting, but the pressures of
having her family actually try to distance her daughter from her start to
make it harder to avoid drugs.
This is a good story with a fairly ambiguous ending that probably
accurately reflects what would happen in real life, and my only complaint
with the movie is that they did let it drag in parts, although that may
have added to the tone of the movie. It is a worthwhile movie to watch.
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Maggie Gyllenhaal |
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Notes and collages
Elvira, Mistress of the Dark
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Images
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Britney Spears. According to the story,
she's in a borrowed bikini, with a bit of one
boob falling out below her top, hanging out with her new rehab pals. |
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Film Clips
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Following up on Marsha Mason ... I covered
her in Blume in Love last week, and Tuna got Cinderella Liberty today.
Here is her third nude appearance
in The Image. (Also covered recently by RokWatch.)
This one is a real
treasure. You may have seen Helen Slater in House in the Hills, but you
probably haven't seen this version. It is a full-negative broadcast from
Danish television, or something. I'm not sure, because I've never run into
anything else with an aspect ratio of 1.23:1. At any rate, it shows some
image composition never seen before. Of course, it isn't so important that
we see the boom mike (below left), but it is kinda cool that we see
Helen's public hair (below right).
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Pat's comments in yellow...
Fostoria, Ohio, attorney Gene Murray is using a
creative method of getting his client's drug charges dismissed. The police chief
is under investigation for allegedly lying on his job application and resume, so
Murray is arguing that he wasn't legally employed as a cop and thus had no
authority to bust his client. To hammer home the point, he plans to prove that
the chief's criminal justice degree is worthless by calling the town police dog
Rocko to the stand and showing that he has the same degree from the same online
college, under the name "John I. Rocko." Murray didn't say how the dog managed
to get a degree from the school.
* Same way a lot of other students do: by licking the
professor.
* He also didn't say how the dog managed to be
valedictorian.
A Harvard study found that a diet rich in ice cream and other high-fat dairy
foods may help women get pregnant.
* Or at least, help them LOOK pregnant.
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