Walking Tall (1973) is based on the true life Tennessee sheriff Bufford Pusser, who became a legend by cleaning out all of the gambling, moonshine, prostitution and corruption nearly singlehandedly. Made for about $500K, the film was a runaway success grossing over $17M in the box office, and spawned two sequels and a short-lived TV show. Joe Don Baker is a professional wrestler who tires of being owned and manipulated by the promoters, so he and his family return to his home town to settle down to a more normal life. They soon discover that organized crime has moved in and paid off the law. Baker runs afoul of the bad guys when he catches them cheating at craps. The beat him up, then cut him up and leave him for dead.

This irritates Baker, especially when the law refuses to do anything, so he gets a big stick, goes to the den of iniquity, breaks some heads, and demands payment for the car they stole and other incidental expenses. He is arrested, but acquitted by jury, and decides to run for sheriff. Takes him a while to learn the job, and by the time they have shot him twice more, and killed his wife and dog, he gets downright peeved and gets even.

Dominick Mazzie is seen with a see through top and no bra. We get a brief glimpse of Brenda Benet's left breast as se is being arrested for prostitution, and buns and left breast from Lynn Borden when she is being beaten as a suspected police informant. IMBb readers have this at 6.3. I can't account for the success of this film. Production value was not there, the redneck hicks seemed more like real redneck hicks being paid to act, the plot was predictable, and it seemed very long at 125 minutes. It must be something to do with an underdog and good guy beating up on all the bad guys. Could also partially be backlash to the civil disobedience of the era. This is barely a C, but many people liked it.

Other Crap:

• Elvis Presley Jr. stopped by to promote his two Portland concerts this weekend and to lay claim to what he considers his rightful birthright as the illegitimate son of Elvis Sr. Wherever Junior goes he lugs along a binder full of copies of letters, notes and clippings that refer to him as the son of Elvis. He has a copy of Elvis's will with highlighted sections that could be referring to more than one child. His birth mother, he said, is Angelique Pettyjohn, a walk-on in the Elvis Sr. move 'Blue Hawaii' who later played in 'Clambake' and had roles on several TV shows.
  • If you are a Star Trek buff, you know exactly who Angelique Pettyjohn is. She's Kirk's alien chick with the green hair and the tinfoil bikini, from "The Gamesters of Triskelion".
  • Her career petered out in the late 70s, but in the 1980's she made a show biz comeback in ... um ... movies for mature audiences, if you catch my drift. Let's just say her career petered back in.
• Here is a career summary of the mom of Elvis Presley, Jr., Angelique Pettyjohn, aka Captain Kirk's green-haired girlfriend.
• A paparazzo catches Sharon Stone topless, and she looks mahvelous. She wanted to be caught, I suppose, since she was topless on a public beach and made no attempt to disguise herself.
• At last, an explanation for Bruce Willis and Lindsay Lohan. Hair loss adds growth to sex drive.
• Lebanese continue the battle of the rallies. The current lead has drifted back to the ANTI-Syrians after a million man march, but PRO-Syrians are planning some counter-counter-counter-counter-rallies even as we speak. Later on this week comes the march of those who really don't give a shit about Syria either way.
• Is the era of free internet news about to end?
• Google's website advertising program, Adsense, is about to have some fairly hefty competition. Yahoo is testing a 'long tail' ad words scheme.
• Not fo' shizzle what it means to whack a cave boy with a cap for fronting on your homeskillet? Consult the Rap Dictionary
• The trailer for Palindromes, the new Todd Solondz movie currently screening at SxSW.
• Quentin Tarantino will NOT make a Friday 13th film. Instead, he plans to re-make The English Patient. I wonder how many different projects he has been rumored to be involved with in the past decade.
• Queer Eye for the Baseball Guys. Six Boston Red Sox players get fashion and grooming tips from those guys who wear Liberace's hand-me-downs.
• Do you think they may be running out of ideas for reality shows? Mr. Romance hopes to uncover "The Next Fabio". Winner gets (I ain't makin' this up) a lifetime gym membership and a contract to appear on the cover of some romantic novels. I think there should be Mr Webmaster - a competition for "regular guys". Various grouchy old farts get to compete, and the winner gets to write Other Crap for a day. And (it goes without saying) gets to appear on the cover of several romantic novels.
• Firefighters remove a car from telephone wires. The best part of the story (besides the great pictures) is this fact: "the driver jumped down from the vehicle and ran to catch a bus prior to the arrival of Engine 2"
• Quentin Tarantino has criticized the makers of James Bond for ditching Pierce Brosnan.
• Halle Berry runs away with the award for "Best Nudity in an Oscar-winning performance". If you're interested in the body count, here is the numerical result of the actual balloting. The order may differ slightly from the pictorial summary because of a few additional votes cast after the summary was written (it was just about a three-way tie for fourth.). Without studying the archives, here's how I would rank them personally, more or less:
  1. Halle
  2. Holly Hunter
  3. Jodie Foster
  4. Glenda Jackson
  5. Gwyneth
  6. Jessica Lange
  7. Jane Fonda "Coming Home"
  8. Julie Christie
  9. Marlee Matlin
  10. Charlize
• Under Pressure from National Institute of Mental Health, NCAA RENAMES MARCH MADNESS "MARCH BIPOLAR DISORDER"
• CBC News: Vancouver 3rd in world in quality of life survey. (Two Swiss cites finished in the top two spots.)
• "A Century of Candy Bars: An Analysis of Wrapper Design" This is an illustrated thesis submitted for a graduate degree from Syracuse.
• Amish hockey team. Reminds me of my high school's team nickname: The Fightin' Amish. Our rally cry: "we sincerely hope to best thee, brother."
• Weekly World News: "HOWARD STERN TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT IN 2008?" Howard vows to put the "fun" back in our citizen's fundamental human rights. I'd vote for him just on the basis of this one platform point: "The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) will be disbanded and complete freedom of expression will be allowed in all media." A more more interesting campaign promise is this: "Every woman who casts a Stern vote will be invited to the White House for a very special, private thank-you spanking -- or, as Stern refers to it, a Butt Bongo Fiesta."
• Matthew Vaughn will direct X-Men 3, and Zak Penn's script has been chosen over the competition. Penn wrote X2, so he brings a steady hand and continuity. Vaughn directed Layer Cake when his colleague Guy Richie dropped out. That is his only directing credit.
• Popular Indian actor caught in Bollywood casting couch sting. : "A private television network in India on Sunday broadcast footage of a sting operation showing a popular Bollywood actor demanding sex from a reporter who posed as an aspiring actress. "
• Dutch Commercial About Why Your Should Learn English. Very funny. Very politically incorrect.
• URL says it all: NakedVolleyball.com
• You know about the Special Olympics, but I'll bet Special Pro Wrestling is something new to you.
• Doonesbury's take on Jeff Gannon. The White House needs a new press stooge. Guess who's elected?
• Yogakitty.com -Yoga for you and your cat.

Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap

MOVIE REVIEWS:

Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

To put it simply...Halle Berry kicked some ass.

Here are the official poll results and comments.

Here are the results of our most recent other polls...
The Top 20 Nude Scenes of 2004

The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 80s

The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 90s

Which actress has been the most convincing playing a stripper.

Who has the best bum in Hollywood?

Best All Time Television Comedy

Email Scoopy Jr. with nominees, comments or suggestions.

"Coyote" (1992)
The only reason to see this is to catch Mitsou Gélinas in the buff. The French-Canadian singer is currently on the English language CBC talking about Quebec culture. But she will always be remembered for making naughty music videos in the 1980s and 1990s where she's completely nude except for a strategically placed chair.

• Mitsou Gelinas: partial boob. (1, 2, 3)
• Jayne Heitmeyer: sexy in catsuit in her very first role.

"Heads or Tails" (1971) aka Pile ou face
French-Canadian softporn about a group of men and women who each try to score with the only woman at a swinging party to keep her clothes on. Lots of sex scenes but they are very dark. But there's enough disco bush in this movie to thatch a rug.

• Diane Arcand: full frontal
• Jacqueline Fellay: full frontal.
• Monique Belisle: full frontal.
• Patricia Foster: full frontal.
• Nathalie Naubert: she's the non-nude cockteaser.
• unknown: very old nude model.

"The Hillz"
Paris Hilton plays Heather, a rich, stuck-up, money grubbing, pompous bitch (hmm.....was she acting?) in this 2004 comedy/drama about rich Boyz in the Hood wannabes who are spending the summer before going to college by terrorizing the city.

Steve 5, a major league baseball prospect, would do anything to impress her and win her before going off to training camp. Although Steve's prospects for future income are good, Heather is hooked up with a rich frat boy, so she's not interested. Eventually, the group gets into so much stuff that Heather is the least of Steve's problems.

There are parts of this flick that aren't bad, but basically, it's a mess: lame, poorly and overacted, appealing mainly to young teens. Paris Hilton's nip slip (see the collage) and numerous pokies may be the only high points (high points......get it?). You'll laugh more AT the movie than WITH the movie.

• Paris Hilton

JACKSON'S FINANCES SCRUTINIZED
He Could Pay Off Five More Kids! - Michael Jackson's prosecutors say they suspect he's $700 million in debt and facing bankruptcy, which could be a motive for him allegedly trying to silence his accuser's family. But Fox News reporter Roger Friedman says they're wrong: Michael's advisors are working on a bail-out deal that would pay all his debts and leave him $100 million cash plus $8 million a year income.