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Casino Job
2009
This is the soft-core spin on Ocean's 11. Some hot chicks execute an
elaborate plan to get revenge on a scumbag casino owner.
I have to say that the film is not so bad by B-movie standards, because the
girls are both pretty and naked, and the script is decent. The complex scam
held my attention throughout the entire film, and there were two pretty nifty
plot twists at the end. Having noted that, I have to add that the execution of
the film is far worse than the basic story line. Some shots are good, and a
few of the actors are respectable, but other actors and camera set-ups seem to
be right out of hard-core porn films, and the dialogue is definitely not the
script's strength.
In other words, you could take this script, punch up the dialogue, hire
professional actors, and make a decent movie out of the core idea, even though
the actual movie is only a pale shadow of that hypothetical movie.
The clips below are self-reviewing.
The four main women got totally naked front and rear:
Amylia Joiner, Ilsa Martinez, Deanna Minerva and Julia Beatty.
Model and commercial pitchwoman
Irina Voronina showed her breasts and a thonged bottom, and performed in a
VERY brief girl-girl scene. As you will see in the clip, I don't think she'll
be taking any work from Meryl Streep.
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OTHER CRAP:
Catch the deluxe
version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles,
here.
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Prêt-à-Porter
2008
Scoop's notes: possibly Robert Altman's worst
film. As I see it, it's about a four way tie for that dishonor, between
O.C and Stiggs, Popeye, Dr T, and this film. IMDb rates those four in his
bottom six, but adds two more into the mix. I have never seen those two,
so they may well belong there.
Although Altman made movies for nearly 50
years, his reputation is based on two bursts of genius that emerged from
an otherwise mediocre career. From 1970 to about 1978, the man was on fire
and turned out movies that were interesting even when they were not his
best efforts. Then he hit a major career slump in 1979-80 with Quintet and
Popeye, and did not recover for a decade and a half. Then, out of the
blue, he found his mojo in 1992-93 and knocked two homers back-to-back
with The Player and Short Cuts. Then, just as quickly as he had surged
back to prominence, he promptly made the abysmal Pret-a-Porter and never
really hit his best stride again. His top seven films all come from those
two productive periods.
The films from his two "oasis" periods.
Median: 7.6, 100% above 6.0.
- (7.88) - 3 Women
(1977)
- (7.80) - MASH
(1970)
- (7.70) - The Player
(1992)
- (7.70) - Short Cuts
(1993)
- (7.69) - Nashville
(1975)
- (7.59) - McCabe &
Mrs. Miller (1971)
- (7.59) - The Long
Goodbye (1973)
- (7.18) - Thieves Like
Us (1974)
- (7.18) - Images
(1972)
- (6.99) - California
Split (1974)
- (6.90) - A Wedding
(1978)
- (6.71) - Brewster
McCloud (1970)
- (6.03) - Buffalo Bill
and the Indians (1976)
The films from the desert: Median 5.9, fewer than half above 6.0.
- (7.28) - Come Back to
the Five and Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean (1982)
- (7.20) - Gosford Park
(2001)
- (7.09) - Vincent &
Theo (1990)
- (7.00) - A Prairie
Home Companion (2006)
- (6.89) - That Cold
Day in the Park (1969)
- (6.80) - Cookie's
Fortune (1999)
- (6.71) - Streamers
(1983)
- (6.24) - A Perfect
Couple (1979)
- (6.21) - The Company
(2003)
- (6.17) - Countdown
(1968)
- (5.93) - The
Delinquents (1957)
- (5.92) - Kansas City
(1996)
- (5.71) - The
Gingerbread Man (1998)
- (5.68) - Fool for
Love (1985)
- (5.47) - HealtH
(1980)
- (5.25) - O.C. and
Stiggs (1985)
- (4.91) - Quintet
(1979)
- (4.81) - Popeye
(1980)
- (4.81) - Prêt-à-Porter
(1994)
- (4.71) - Dr T and the
Women (2000)
- (4.64) - Beyond
Therapy (1987)
Having noted all that, one must concede that Altman was usually good
at getting famous women naked, and he was at the top of his nudity game
with this film, although the nudity is basically concentrated into the
last few minutes, and does not come from the stars, except Sally
Kellerman.
Sally
Kellerman, Samples below.
Tracey
Ullman, Samples below. If Tracey could live her life again, I'll bet
she would not do this scene. She has a body made for radio.
Kasia Figura, Samples below.
various
models, Samples below.
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Notes and collages
Sorority Boys
2002
Bree Turner
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Watchmen
(2009)
Cam quality capture of female superhero Silhouette (Apollonia
Vanova) and her girlfriend nurse (Leah Gibson), who play a couple of
lesbians who get murdered early on in the movie.
Apollonia Vanova and Leah Gibson: sexy but
dead
Kyon Kis Liye
(2003)
aka "Why? And for Whom?"
Canadian Bollywood film starring former model Ruby Dhalla before she went
into politics. Even though this is very PG-rated she's trying to block its DVD
distribution. D'uh, that stunt didn't work for Pamela Anderson.
A Bug and a Bag of Weed
(2006)
Canadian hoser comedy.
Amy Kerr (pink tank top) and Kristin Langille: very sexy
Diverted
(2009)
Recent CBC 9/11 movie based on diversion of jet
airliners to the small town of Gander, Newfoundland.
Anita Majumdar: some nudity
Karen LeBlanc: cleavage
Freezer Burn: The Invasion of Laxdale
(2008)
Another Canadian hoser comedy this time starring
Tom Green.
Sarain Boylan: partial boob.
Leona Brausen: mega cleavage
The Stone Angel
(2007)
Artsy fartsy movie with much theoretical nudity
but only a couple of nipple sightings in reality
Christine Horne: various nudity
Nada Abdel Shahid: partial boob
Ellen Page: fully clothed sex in chair
Sex Drive
(2008)
Canadian actress Amanda Crew has a lead in this American sex comedy but
manages to show nothing even though she took a whizz in a car radiator, had
a catfight, nearly got raped by a lesbian bulldyke in prison, and finally
got her anal cherry popped in the end.
Amanda Crew
The Stranger Beside Me
(2003)
Another Anne Rule biopic about Ted Bundy.
Suki Kaiser: a bit of side boob having prison
conjugal sex.
Brenda James: sexy
unknowns: sexy but dead
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Vice
2008
I like Michael Madson even though most of his work is from the Marlon
Brando grunt and mumble school of acting, but this 2008 crime mystery is
not his best, simply because the story tended to drag to a fairly obvious
ending, not a good thing for a mystery.
Max is a detective who is having problems getting over the death of his
wife, and he's not too particular how he does his job. Shoot an innocent
young woman bystander by mistake? No problem, just throw down a gun and
claim she was trying to kill him.
Max is the lead during a botched undercover drug deal where things go
very badly, and even worse, the dope disappears. Max suspects one of his
men grabbed the goods.
As Max comes under heat from Internal Affairs and tries to figure out
what happened to the drugs, the men who were in on the bust start dying
one-by-one. Now Max has an additional worry....is he next?
It sounds better than it was, and that's too bad. Writing killed this
puppy. While the story isn't unique, telling it in a different way would
have made it much more exciting.
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| Brenda Matthews |
Justine Warrington |
Sandra-Jessica Couturier |
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Pics
Cynthia Klitbo (Mexican soap opera
actress)
Mai-Britt Vingsoe (Scandinavian TV
hostess)
Film Clips
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