Wednesday

Tuna
"The Defilers"

The Defilers (1965) is the first film made by Dave Friedman after coming to Hollywood. He had been working in Florida with Herschell Gordon Lewis, and swore his first film would be better than anything he had made with Lewis. He teamed with Lee Frost, and made what has become the quintessential roughie. The roughies were made in contrast to the "nudie cutie," which tended to be silly, rather than erotic. The roughies combined sex and violence, and were made in black and white, recalling earlier stag films. The film was shot in five days with a total budget of $11k. From script to release was a total of two months.

The story is about two best friends, both bored and rich, who divide their time between pot and sex. One of the two is a real sadist. They end up kidnapping a girl who has just arrived in Hollywood and knew nobody just for kicks. The kidnap victim was played by Swedish Mai Jansson, who showed breasts and buns. Linda Cochran and Carol Dark also showed breasts and buns as girlfriends, and two unknowns show breasts skinny dipping.

IMDB readers have this at 4.5 of 10. This is essential viewing for exploitation fans. It is interesting that Friedman and Lewis invented the roughie with Scum of the Earth, and Friedman made what is considered the best of the roughies in The Defilers. This is a typical Something Weird release, with two features, trailers, exploitation art, and a commentary with none other than Dave Friedman, which is worth the price of the DVD all by itself. Friedman is sharp as a tack, and a very entertaining storyteller. All in all, this is a C+. A great genre film, but not any crossover appeal.

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  • Carol Dark (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)
  • Linda Cochran (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
  • Mai Jansson (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Movies:

    Empire (2002)

    Empire is not a bad movie at all. It's kind of a new millennium version of Carlito's Way. It has an interesting, complex plot, a solid score consisting of rap and salsa, and the unique screen personality of John Leguizamo, who's all kinds of "bad" mixed with all kinds of bad. It has some sexy nudity as well, but I don't know who these girls are. It's also a pretty decent DVD - lots of features, and an excellent 2.35 transfer. The film is not without flaws, but I think you'll like it if you like the whole premise of "ugly street scene guy meets even uglier uptown investment banker guy".

     

    Personal Velocity (2001)

     

    Personal Velocity won a lot of awards at Sundance 2002. I hated it. It's basically an art film - it's mostly a narrator reading from a book of short stories, and a lot of hand held DV photography. The cinematography is frequently blurry (a by-product of the conversion from DV to film), and this nude scene is no exception. The scene is not even worth looking at, to tell you the truth, not even on DVD.

     

    8 Mile (2002)

    Thanks to the genius of director Curtis Hanson, 8 mile is a helluva good movie if you like Eminem. If you don't like ol' Slim Shady, well, you can skip it because he's on screen about the same percentage of time as Saddam Hussein's vote share in the last Iraqi election.

    If you accept this premise: "rap is music", then 8 Mile is a musical, and part of the much despised economic and artistic revival of the movie musical in the past year or so, including Chicago and Moulin Rouge.

    • Kim Basinger. Not much to see here: the top of Kim's butt and the side of her breast. (1, 2)

    • Gina Lynn. Plenty to see here. She is not in the movie, but in a special, controversial, made-for-DVD video of Eminem's "Superman".

    Sordid Lives (2000)

    The tag line sums it up accurately - "a BLACK comedy about WHITE trash".

    The plot, such as it is, centers around the death of the matriarch of a white trash family and the preparations for her funeral. The real reason for the movie is to make fun of dumb-ass Southerners. The jokes are pretty much familiar. Big hair, howling songs, bright polyester clothing, chain smokin', closeted gay guys who can't face their families, high heels at the supermarket.

    I did get a kick out of the film in a couple of places. Two drunken women plan to get revenge for the infidelity of one of their husbands, so they hold guns on the husband, and the wife says "now you tell me just why you needed to cheat on me with that slut", whereupon her girlfriend said "hey, thet's my momma yer talkin' about". It turns out that the husband feels doubly guilty. He not only cheated on his wife with her best friend's mamma, but he killed the pool ol' gal at the motel by carelessly leaving his wooden legs lying around. She tripped on them on her way to the bathroom, cracked her head, that's all she wrote.

    A couple of other things were kinda funny. For example, at all times there were big buckets of fried food lying around every room, and people were nibbling constantly.

    On the other hand, the film was really loud and screechy. Everyone talked too loud and delivered the punch lines as if they were expecting a background drummer to deliver a rim-shot.

    The biggest negative is that there are times when this movie takes itself way too seriously. I really got disoriented by the mood swings. It would get funny, then it would portray one of the gay guys as tragic, and he'd be crying away while talking to his shrink in a completely serious scene. Odd stuff, and I didn't really like it at all when it would turn dead serious in the middle of broad, cynical farce.

    By the way, if you are wondering what ever happened to Delta Burke, Bonnie Bedelia, and Olivia Newton-John, and if you love the music of Tammy Wynette, this is your movie. Newton-John sings a lot, and when she isn't singing, the gay transvestite guy is doing his act as a bad Tammy Wynette impersonator.

    • Rosemary Alexander (1, 2, 3) removed her top and exposed some very large breasts in a failed attempt to seduce a gay guy. It was a pretty funny scene. She's a shrink who's trying to "dehomosexualize" a flaming queen - she is saying "fuck me", and he's saying "oh, you're not wearing any panties, Dr Eve. Eeew. I need a Mylanta"

     

     

    The Man From Elysian Fields (2002)

    I really liked this movie, but it has no nudity at all. Talk about an eclectic cast: the three stars are Andy Garcia, James Coburn, and Mick Jagger, and they were all excellent. Comments here

     

    The Grey Zone (2001)

    What would you think if I told you it's a movie written and directed by Tim Blake Nelson, starring David Arquette. You'd think it's some kind of slapstick cracker comedy, right?

    You couldn't be more wrong.

    It is a horrifying, graphic, tragic, story about the death camps at Auschwitz, focusing in the Sonderkommandos, the special Jewish units who were used by the Nazis to persuade their fellow Jews to undress and enter the extermination "showers". After the mass slaughter, the Sonderkommandos were also responsible for getting the bodies to the crematoria, then disposing of the ashes. This responsibility bought them plenty of food, clean linens, cigarettes, and four months of life. When the four months were up, they were killed and a new group would be impressed into service. Why did they do it? For the promise of four months of life, which might possibly turn into something more with a German defeat.

    The Nazis had no trouble with the first eleven groups, but Group 12 actually managed to organize an armed revolt. Although they all died, they managed to blow up about half of the death camp's facilities.

    There is nudity from dozens, maybe hundreds of people of every shape, age, and gender.

    But you won't enjoy it, and I certainly am not going to make any images from this film.

    By our standard, this film is a C+.  It is horrifying, and I was in tears through half of the movie. It shows just about every detail of life and death in the concentration camps. Arquette does fine in a serious role. It is very powerful, but obviously not for everyone.

     

     

    Other crap:


    What're the odds?

     

    2003 NCAA Mens Basketball Championship

    Closing Date: Mar 19, 2003 20:00

    Kentucky established as a STRONG early betting favorite

    Bet Selections Win Odds
    Kentucky 2/1
    Arizona 3/1
    Oklahoma 6/1
    Texas 6/1
    Kansas 8/1
    Florida 10/1
    Pittsburgh 12/1
    Duke 14/1
    Connecticut 18/1
    Syracuse 18/1
    Illinois 18/1
    Louisville 18/1
    Wake Forest 18/1
    Maryland 20/1
    Mississippi State 22/1
    Marquette 22/1
    Michigan State 25/1
    Xavier 25/1
    Notre Dame 25/1
    Wisconsin 33/1
    Oregon 35/1
    Stanford 35/1
    LSU 35/1
    Memphis 35/1
    Missouri 50/1
    Oklahoma State 50/1
    Creighton 50/1
    Cincinnati 66/1
    Gonzaga 66/1
    NC State 66/1
    Alabama 80/1
    California 80/1
    Tulsa 80/1
    Arizona State 80/1
    Indiana 100/1
    Western Kentucky 100/1
    Utah 150/1

     

     

     

     

     

     


    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Hankster
    'Caps and comments by Hankster:

    Today the time machine takes a trip to 1988 and a double feature is on the bill.

    First up is "Stealing Home" and a scene with Beth Broderick (probably best known for her role on "Sabrina The Teenage Witch"). But back in 1988 she portrayed an older woman who seduces teenager Jonathan Silverman. Beth almost reveals her breasts as Jonathan gets one hell of a feel.

    The main attraction today is Sherilyn Fenn (of "Twin Peaks" fame) who has no problem showing off her boobs in a shower scene and as her lover opens her robe.

    • Beth Broderick (1, 2, 3, 4)

    • Sherilyn Fenn (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Vejiita
    Macarena Gómez
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Raquel Meroño
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)


    Nude in several scenes from the movie "Dagon" (2001). A film by horror film director Stuart Gordon ("Re-Animator") that many say is one of the best adaptations of an H.P. Lovecraft story.


    Paula Trickey
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    Topless and great thong views as she works the brass pole in scenes from "Maniac Cop 2" (1990).

    Sophie Ngan
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Gorgeous breasts (plus some rear nudity and pubes) in scenes from the Hong Kong movie, "Naked Poison 2".

    Variety
    Josie Maran
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    Scans by Marsie of the beautiful brunette supermodel posing topless and mostly topless.

    Lara Flynn Boyle Topless scenes and gettin' it on with Lowell from "Wings" in scenes from "Susan's Plan".

    Maria Bello

    Others


    Dann takes a look at "Auto Focus".

    Dann adds...
    For those of us that remember the TV show Hogan's Heroes which started in 1965, Auto Focus is a fascinating look at the life and death of star Bob Crane. For those that don't, it's a slow-moving story of a TV star obsessed with sex.


    Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    ODD ENVIRONMENTAL NEWS
    Rake Them Over The Coals! - A Rice University study found that the haze over Houston, Texas, contains tiny bits of polyunsaturated fatty acids created by barbecued meat dripping onto hot coals. Some Texans reacted angrily, saying Texans are born to barbecue, and environmentalists will not take away their grills by claiming tiny meat particles and hickory smoke are pollutants.

  • You'll have to pry the barbecue from their cold, dead hand!
  • Proving that Texans live and breathe barbecue.
  • Don't ask Texans to choose between barbecue and Rice.
  • One Texan suggested that people switch from charcoal to grills that use clean-burning propane and propane accessories.


    NAGGING MOTHER-IN-LAW NOW GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE
    Everybody Loves Ramondo - Italy's Supreme Court has ruled that a nagging mother-in-law is grounds for divorce. A 23-year-old wife testified that her mother-in-law made her life hell by constantly claiming she wasn't good enough for her son, she was a bad mother, and was only interested in makeup and dieting so she could attract other men, none of which was true. Her husband was so dominated by his mother, he wouldn't speak up. The court granted the divorce and gave the wife child custody, their house and $600 a month alimony. The husband moved back in with his mother.

  • So now, everybody's happy!
  • The good news: with all that alimony, he'll never be able to move out again.
  • At least all that makeup and dieting will pay off now.

  • From the Mail Bag
    Hey Scoop,

    Here's a Follow-up to the Ludvig Borga running for Finnish Parliament story.....

    Yep, Tony Halme alias Ludvig Borga alias The Viking really got elected and gathered the fifth highest number of votes in the whole country...

    But he obviously hasn't forgotten his wrestling career and opened his new career with a little pre-match mocking and mouth bashing - by calling our president a dyke on national radio... Aren't we so lucky!

    -RoSSol