Friday

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To see and use all the Funhouse features, you need Netscape 6.+ or MSIE 5.+.

• Netscape 6.2.2 is available free for download or on CD.
• MSIE 6.0 is available free.

Slap Shot (1977) is the third film Paul Newman did with George Roy Hill (Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid and The Sting were the first two). Newman is a player-coach of the worst minor league hockey team in the league. He is simultaneously trying to get back with his estranged wife, seduce the wife of his best player, and find a way to make his team win. The pressure increases when the town mill closes, and it is announced that the team will be disbanded at the end of the season. He discovers that overly physical play not only pleases fans, but wins games. He also starts a rumor that the team will be sold to a group of investors hoping that it will come true.

This is not so much a film about hockey as it is about hockey players. It was written by Nancy Dowd (her first) and is based on conversations with her brother who was a professional hockey player. She travelled with his team, and he taped real locker room and bus conversations so she could make the film realistic. In fact, there was some criticism of the rough language in the film. Newman, who played amateur hockey, did nearly all of his own skating, only bringing in a double for some fancy stick work that was beyond his ability. Supporting actor Michael Ontkean actually played minor league hockey. The exposure is from Melinda Dillon, who plays the estranged wife of a hockey player who ends up in bed with Newman. If we ever have a poll for best performance by a nipple in a supporting role, she is a good candidate. On one level, this film is mostly fun and has some hilarious moments, but it also speaks to the controversy over whether or not violence has a place in hockey. Most people, including me, liked this film. IMDB readers rate it 7.1 of 10. The 25th anniversary DVD just released is a very nice Widescreen transfer loaded with special features. This film is at least a B. You don't have to like hockey, and there is enough action for those who don't usually like comedy.

UPDATES:

Honte's site is updated. Mammoth update this week: 6 meg of new material.

RIP:

One additional thought on Dudley Moore. Pat Reeder pointed out (below) that Dudley and his partner Peter Cook had a great impact on British comedy. Less known is his impact on Mike Myers. If you don't know what I am talking about, watch "Foul Play" and the firstAustin Powers movie back-to-back, and you'll see where Myers got the idea for the ultimate 60's-70's swinger! Dudley plays - well, frankly, he plays Austin Powers, at least in terms of his bedroom technique.

MOVIES:

Bull Durham's tagline says everything that needs to be said.  "It's all about sex and sport. What else is there?"

• Susan Sarandon (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

She Creature was a made-for-cable film in a series intending to recreate the look and feel of the old-time creature and horror films. Rya Kihlstedt was topless most through of the movie, and even did a pseudo-lesbian scene with Carla Gugino, who was dressed. Not my kind of movie (creature kills people in grisly ways, although Sir Robin was not at all afraid), but beautiful set design, creepy atmosphere and plenty of nudity. I believe that makes this the Citizen Kane of  Evil Lesbian Mermaid movies.

• Rya Kihlstedt (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

Slap Shot 2 was a lame attempt to make a few bucks from the cult audience which loved Slap Shot. It probably includes every sports movie cliché in the book. I think they hoped for a theatrical distribution, but that hope may actually have been a temporary lapse of sanity.

• Random groupies (1, 2, 3)

In honor of Amelie's Oscar nomination, here is Audrey Tautou's incredible butt in "Le Libertin", and her topless scene in another movie. I haven't seen Amelie, but everyone I have talked to has been completely charmed by it, from my cold-hearted, unsentimental, retired USMC Col. friend to my 15 year old daughter. It was considered a runaway Oscar favorite, but ended up losing to that Sarajevo war story. Amazingly enough, Tautou went through the entire film without saying "look, boss, dee plane".

• Audrey Tautou (1, 2)

Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

• Penélope Cruz, topless in "Abre los ojos" (1997). The Spanish film which was remade for American audiences as "Vanilla Sky", and directed by Cameron Crowe,

• Mary Steenburgen, rear nudity plus very brief breast exposure in scenes from "Life as a House".

Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website. www.graphic-barry.com.

Probably the most unusual "Babe in Bondage" scene that I have ever come across, from the movie "Garden of Evil". The beautiful Angie Everhart is tied down and covered by flowers while being menaced by extremely psychotic Malcolm McDowell (even more that usual). Sadly this was in her pre-nudity days, so all of the good parts are concealed by strategically placed flowers.

• Angie Everhart (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

Unknown

• Click here for the details from the Sci-Fi Channel

Wilder wrote and directed such classics as "Sunset Boulevard," "Some Like it Hot" and "Double Indemnity," "Stalag 17", "Seven Year Itch" and "Sabrina". He was 95.

A few words from Pat Reeder...

For anyone who loves comedy as we do, Wednesday was a sad day, due to the tragic but hardly unexpected passing of Dudley Moore and Milton Berle. The standard obituaries are full of the usual career highlights, but I thought it might be nice to pass along a couple of things that they won't mention.

First, on Dudley Moore: Dudley got a lot of bad reviews for the American movies he made after "10" and "Arthur," but I really don't think it was his fault. He did the best he could with material that was just too thin, and that's the fault of Hollywood and its low regard for the importance of good writing. But if you really want to see how funny Dudley Moore could be, check out his earlier work, with "Beyond The Fringe" and his partner from that show, the brilliant Peter Cook. Dud made a number of records with both acts, and some of the sketches were obvious inspirations for Monty Python and are still hilarious to this day (the most famous is the one where Dud plays a one-legged man auditioning for the part of Tarzan, and Pete tries to reject him gently, without saying why). Pete and Dud also had a TV sketch show in the '60s in Britain that Laura and I watched videos of just recently, and laughed until we hurt. Plus, they cut some great records under the name "Derek and Clive," mostly improv material as two dim-witted and incredibly foul-mouthed Englishmen. If you ever see those, pick them up (but don't play them on the air!) . And of course, Pete and Dud made one of our all-time favorite films, the original "Bedazzled." Forget the tasteless and unfunny remake and check this out sometime. It may be as stylistically '60s mod as Austin Powers, but its humor and message are timeless.

Scoop's comments: agree 100%. Beyond the Fringe is an acknowledged wellspring of British Humor, and the Pythons would be the first to acknowledge their indebtedness to Peter Cook and Dudley Moore.

Next Time, Try Rolling
Last year, Daniel Schuddinck, a father of nine from Lichtaart, Belgium, tried to break the world record for crawling on hands and knees. The record is 12.5 miles. But after crawling three miles, he quit, saying, "My wrists are killing me." But he didn't let it stop him: this year, he wore specially-reinforced knee pads and tried a new "caterpillar-like" crawling technique. This time, he gave up after less than three miles. He says he won't crawl again.

* However, he did tie Monica Lewinsky's old record for "Most Time Spent On Your Knees."

PBS SHOOTS FOR YOUTH
American Masters: Britney Spears - PBS officials are alarmed that their median viewer age is now 55, while their prime-time ratings are the lowest since 1978. So they are tinkering with shows to try to draw a younger audience. Already, longtime "Wall Street Week" host Louis Rukeyer has quit in a huff over the changes. PBS insists they are just trying to "replenish" the audience, not pander to young viewers.

* The new host of "Wall Street Week"....Carson Daly.

Scoop,

Here are some photos you might get a kick out of:

And here's some stuff from IMDB News. First up, it turns out Angelina Jolie is the perfect woman. That is, if you like 'em tattooed and violent...

Angelina Is Vogue Perfection

Angelina Jolie has been named fashion bible Vogue's first perfect woman. The sexy actress fronts the magazine's first-ever Shape issue, which "celebrates the female form in all its glorious variety."

Vogue editor Anna Wintour claims Jolie represents "physical perfection" and "fantastic form," and hired celebrity snapper Annie Liebovitz to capture the actress on film. Jolie admits she's thrilled with the honour, but never sees herself as a modern beauty. She says, "I went through a stage where I was denying anything feminine about myself. I think I'd make a good boy. "I don't think of myself as voluptuous or even feminine. I always thought that I was too angular." Asked what she dislikes most about her appearance, she says, "My lips on their own are bright red, which I hate."

The Shape issue also names British model Sophie Dahl as the epitome of "curvy," Devon Aoki as "short" and six foot Gucci model Eva Kubatov as "tall."

Next, a juvenile attack on Halle Berry's website. Is drawing a mustache and goatee on Halle a hate crime now?...

Angry Kidman Fan Defaces Halle's Site

A furious Nicole Kidman fan hacked into Halle Berry's official internet website to vent their fury over Berry's Oscar triumph. Australian actress Nicole was tipped as a frontrunner in the race for the golden statuette on Sunday for her role in Moulin Rouge. But she was pipped to the post by an emotional Halle, who won after a breathtaking performance in Monster's Ball.

A devotee of Nicole was so furious at the redhead star's loss, they used technology to exact revenge on stunning Halle's internet site Hallewood, which she uses for her news, biography and webchats. In place of the hi-tech cartoon-themed site, a simple defaced image of the beautiful actress has been added, sporting a handlebar moustache and goatee plus strange blue and green eyes. And the angry hacker has simply left the misspelt words "Just Nicol Kidman."

A disgusted Halle devotee said, "I couldn't believe it when I logged on to the site. She's my favorite actress and I was so pleased when she won the Oscar. But the sick geek who did this has made her look like one of the Three Musketeers. It's awful."

And some good news about the Funhouse Queen: winning an Oscar will not change Jennifer Connally's career choices. So in her next movie, maybe she'll be naked again...

Connelly Stays Grounded After Oscar Win

Jennifer Connelly insists her Oscar win will not change her career too much. The A Beautiful Mind star, who won best actress, says she's grateful for the honor but won't let it change her life.

She says, "I'm immensely flattered by it. All that said, you know, I'm working now on something else, and then there's the next job and it's kind of like I start from scratch."

Jennifer will not let her ego swell after receiving the award. She said, "I get right back into the 'will I be good?' (mode). So, I'm just hoping that I can do well in the next (movie)." Connelly's next big movie is the action flick, The Hulk.