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"Fatal Frames" (1996)
Fatal Frames (1996) is now my choice for the worst film containing photography or characters ever. I really tried to watch it, but, after the first 30 minutes, I had to fast forward through it for the exposure. An American director is brought to Rome to make a rock video for Stefania Stella (played by Stefania Stella). At the same time, someone is making snuff films, and all of the victims are women known to the American. Stella speaks in very broken English, but that is only a minor distraction compared to trying to follow the plot, and the real low point of the film is the photography.
We have about four styles of lighting/photography:
1) Hand held blue
2) Hand held orange
3) Hand held grainy B&W
4) Oversaturated color
I could see no pattern to the choices of lighting, other than the snuff stuff was in grainy B&W, and was very graphic. The killer Ginzues the women with a machete. The official IMDB score is a way over-inflated 2.9/10, but the mean vote is 2.0/10. Even this is higher than I rate it. Stefania has a blue sex scene, where she is supposedly having sex, but is wearing very obvious thong underwear. I can think of absolutely nothing good to say about this film. Based on the Scoopy A to F scale, it is a Q at best.
Thumbnails
Stefania Stella
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| Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
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Scoopy's revised bumper sticker: "Life's too short to dance with ugly women or, for that matter, to dance with pretty ones unless you can get laid afterwards".
New to DVD
I revisited The Apostate, the grade-b mass murder mystery with Dennis Hopper and Richard Grieco (DVD images are a substantial upgrade). Poor movie, great nudity, obscure women..
- Johanna Quintero
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- Bridget White
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I looked at Sophie's Choice. No nudity. Great DVD. Excellent movie.
TomCat Tomcat started his new series of Polish women with w's and z's in their last name:
- Monica Bolibrzuch
- Anna Chodokowska
- Hanna Dunowska. The first word of this movie is "lzy", if you care to start your course in Polish phonetics. Cool looking movie. Virgin sacrifices and stuff, kind of a Conanski the
Barbarian.
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| | Probert
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Today we welcome another new contributor to the Fun House.
"Among the Cinders"
Originally from New Zealand, Rebecca Gibney has made her name in Australian TV series. She first caught my eye when she was a regular member of the supporting cast of "Flying Doctors".
Among The Cinders has been done before, though I've never seen more than a couple of images. Given the age (10 years at least) of the tape, and the fact that it was recorded on a distinctly iffy machine, I'm quite pleased with the result.
"Stealing Beauty"
Again, this particular scene with Rachel Weisz has been done many times. These images are just my take on it. At some point, in the next few days, I'll be having a go at the Liv Tyler scenes.
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"Werewolf Woman"
'Werewolf Woman' is a typical early-mid '70's Euro horror. Plenty of nakedness and simulated sex. Though, in this case, the director was an exponent of the gyno-cam - just wait til you see the Annika Borel (the title actress) 'caps that I'm working on!
As I understand it, Dagmar Lassander, a popular German actress, did this film when she was in her mid forties. She was apparently so appalled by the results of her efforts that she disowned the film and demanded to have her name taken off the credits.
I think she looks marvelous, given her reported age!
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"The Osterman Weekend"
I have not seen this scene of Meg Foster 'capped before, which I was quite surprised about. But, maybe, I'm biased as she's one of my favorite actresses if only because of her strangely pale blue eyes.
Cassie Yates. I saw someone else's take on this scene a few weeks ago.
Helen Shaver. I'm sure someone's done this before, though I can't remember
seeing it.
| Scorpion
| Carrie Janisse
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From the 1993 softcore movie, "Desert Passion". The Cowboy and Indian sex fantasy scene in #2 is interesting.
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Missy Browning
Unknown
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Two brunettes with wonderful breasts in more scenes from "Desert Passion". Missy gives us a peek from every angle except the gyno-cam. Meanwhile, our mystery guest shows off her breasts, plus a hint of pubes.
| Kim Yates
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From "Dangerous Invitation". Simulated sex scenes with topless, bum, and some exposure down under.
| Lauren Hays
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Lauren showing off her well crafted robo-hooters, and pretty much everything else worth seeing in several scenes from "Dangerous Invitation".
| Kim and Lauren
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Naturally, no Skinemax movie would be complete without a little lesbo action.
| | Miaou
| | Isabelle Pasco |
Topless in a love scene from "Céline" (1992).
| | Florence Pernel |
Partial breast and panties. From the movie "Que les gros salaires lèvent le doigt!!!" (1982)
| | Amélie Pick |
Very nice breast exposure in scenes from "Retour à Fonteyne" (1999).
| | Clémence Poesy |
Shower scene with some breast exposure from an episode of the French TV series "Les Monos"
| | and ...
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Chandra North
Cheryl Tiegs
Daniela Pestova
Christie Brinkley
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More bikini babes from the SI desk calendar by The Rawhide Kid. Or as Bill and Ted would call him..."Mr. The Kid".
| | Gillian Anderson |
One word....HOT!
Here's Gillian at the Oscars. Sure, the X-files may be crap now that Mulder is gone, but that's ok for two reasons:
X-Philes have "The Lone Gunmen"
Scully is looking better than ever!
| Anna Kournikova |
A great scan by Yuccaman.
| | Helen Hunt |
A superb tribute collage by ZonononZor, mixing great scans and excellent nude vidcaps from "Dr. T and the Women".
| | The Funnies
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Top ten signs you've joined a cheap health plan:
10. Annual breast exam conducted at Hooters.
9. Directions to your doctor's office include "take a right when you enter the trailer park."
8. Tongue depressors taste faintly like Fudgesicles.
7. Only proctologist in the plan is Gus from Roto-Rooter.
6. Only item listed under Preventive Care coverage is "an apple a day."
5. Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.
4. "Patient responsible for 200% of out of network chargers" is not a typo.
3. The only expense covered 100% is embalming.
2. With your last HMO, your Prozac didn't come in different colors with little "m's" on them.
AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'VE JOINED A CHEAP HMO....
1. YOU ASK FOR VIAGRA, YOU GET A POPSICLE STICK AND DUCT TAPE!!!!
Read the following six statements and the amazingconclusion they lead to.
1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is basketball.
2. The sport of choice for maintenance-level employees is bowling.
3. The sport of choice for frontline workers is football.
4. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball.
5. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis.
6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf.
Amazing conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
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