Tuesday

Tuna
"Aprimi Il Cuore"

Aprimi Il Cuore (2002), or Open My Heart (2003 subtitled English release) is an Italian film, the first two acts of which are one of the very best coming of age erotic stories I have ever seen. The final act is very dark. What follows will be a complete spoiler.

Spoilers

Maria (Natalie Cristiani) is a hooker, who has been supporting herself and her sister Caterina (Giada Colagrande) since their hooker mother died 15 years earlier. The sisters are lesbian lovers. Caterina is only allowed out of the house to attend ballet lessons, but is home schooled by her sister, and is very bright and well-read. Caterina is now 17, and beginning to think about sex with men. When the dance school custodian pays attention to her, she has her first crush. Her sister comes on to him, and he pays for her services. It is clear, however, that it is Caterina he is interested in. Maria, on a later "date," brings Caterina to him, and helps him take her virginity. Maria tells him later not to see Caterina again. He pays no attention, and visits Caterina whenever Maria is out working.

Maria eventually catches them, and that is when the story changes abruptly. She poisons him, pushes Caterina into prostitution, then poisons each of her tricks. Caterina eventually ends things by poisoning Maria and committing suicide.

End Spoilers

Sex scenes between Natalie Cristiani and Giada Colagrande are not very explicit, but are very hot. Sex with men is rather more explicit, but Cristiani is rather cold with the men, as is Colagrande with all but her first. Cristiani shows breasts in several scenes. Colagrande does full frontal and rear nudity. I really wish they had stayed with the erotic coming of age story, and found an ending more in line with the first two thirds of the story. That being said, the plot is decidedly original, which is a plus. Overall, this is a C-, but could have easily been a C+ had it stayed in the erotic genre.

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  • Giada Colagrande (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26)
  • Natalie Cristiani (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

    • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Sin City (2005):

    This is a complete synopsis of all the nudity in Sin City from Jaime King and Carla Gugino (there is also a lot of flesh exposed by thongs and see-through tops worn by the anonymous hookers in Old Town.)

     

    Other Crap:

    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap

     

     

    MOVIE REVIEWS:

    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

     

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Jr's Polls
    Here are the official results for last week's poll.

    The Top 20 Best Sex Scenes


    Here are the results of our most recent other polls...
    The Top 20 Nude Scenes of 2004
    The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 80s
    The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 90s
    Which actress has been the most convincing playing a stripper.
    Who has the best bum in Hollywood?
    Best All Time Television Comedy
    Best Nudity in an Oscar-winning performance

    Email Scoopy Jr. with more nominees, comments or suggestions.


    Crimson Ghost
    NOTE: We currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.


    A few odds n' ends from the Ghost today....

    First up, UK babe Anna Friel briefly topless while gettin' it on with Obi-wan in scenes from "Rogue Trader" (1999).


    Next up, here is Barbara Hershey baring all while being molested by and invisible demon in scenes from "The Entity" (1981). The video clip is definitely worth a look if your a Hershey fan.


    Finally from the Ghost, a rare bit of nudity from "L Word" star Jennifer Beals as she bares breasts and a bit of bum in a sex scene from "The Prophecy II" (1998).

    Jack Snow
    'Caps and comments by Jack Snow:

    Here's another batch of caps from Euro-TV:

    "Marias letzte Reise"
    Nina Kunzendorf shows almost all 3 B's while stripping down to so some skinny-dipping (clear breast and bum views), plus she shows a bit of breast in another scene.

    • Nina Kunzendorf (1, 2)


    "Hedwig Courths-Mahler - Durch Liebe erlöst:"
    A two-part TV-movie with another skinny-dipping scene. The time we see all three B's from Pauline Knof.


    "Popp dich schlank!"
    The young and busty Theresa Scholze runs around fully nude.


    "Lieber Georg"
    A stageplay performed at the "Schauspielhaus Bochum". Jessica Früh and Lore Brunner had scenes in very see-thru dresses.


    "Wolffs Revier, ep. Von Liebe und Hass"
    Annett Mohamed topless in flashbacks of a sex scene. Some folks may know her from Zalman King's "chromiumblue.com" where she was credited as Annette Culp.


    "Otto ist auf Frauen scharf"
    Typical Austro-German comedy from the 60's. Clear rear nude views, plus we brief toplessness can be seen in a mirrored reflection of Christiane Rücker.


    "Zwei Compañeros aka Vamos a matar, compañeros"
    Spaghetti-Western by Sergio Corbucci featuring Iris Berben in one of her very early roles.. We see her flashing a breast when her shirt is ripped open by a bad guy.


    "Hinter Gittern"
    Two more shower scenes from the early episodes of this German series. Cheryl Shepard is topless plus she also shows a bit of pubes in the episode "Freundinnen". German comedian Annette Frier can be seen topless in some very bad lightning on the episode "Falsches Spiel"


    "Verschollen"
    The series is about to be cancelled, which is quite a pity since it has improved a lot in the nudity department. Berrit Arnold bared her breasts in the episodes "Koks" and "Schnee unter Palmen", Katrin Brockmann did the same in the episode "Lebendig begraben"

    Variety
    Kelly Preston
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)

    		Many thanks to Vejiita for these great 'caps of a young and perfect Kelly Preston in scenes from "Mischief" (1985). We see her amazing toplessness, plus a bit of bum in #4 and even some bush in links #6 and #7.

    Mia Kirshner Mia topless during the opening credits of "The L Word". 'Caps by Twitchy.

    Sarah Shahi
    (1, 2)

    		The exotic and beautiful new addition to "The L Word" wearing a very lo-cut dress while out in public. Looks like we even get a hint of a nip slip in #1.

    Evangeline Lilly Here's a great collage featuring the "Lost" star stripped down to her bra and panties.

    Marguerite Moreau
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

    		Johnny Moronic 'caps of the former child actress (co-star of all 3 "Mighty Ducks" movies) going topless and baring a bit of bum (#9) in scenes from "Easy".

    Maria Conchita Alonso
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    		Señor Skin 'caps of the Cuban-American actress topless while riding Richard Grieco in scenes from "Blackheart" (1998).

    Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    BOB MARLEY IS STILL SERIOUSLY DEAD
    No Movie, Cry - The BBC apologized for sending an e-mail to the Bob Marley Foundation, requesting an interview with Mr. Marley for a proposed documentary on his song, "No Woman, No Cry." They said they'd need to spend one or two days with him, and "it would only work with some participation from Bob Marley himself." They did not realize that the reggae legend has been dead since 1981.

  • The people at the Bob Marley Foundation were so stoned, it took them two days to remember he was dead, too.


    PARIS HILTON OFFERED HOOKER JOB
    Check Into A Hilton! - An ex-psychiatric patient who claims he's a former pimp and calls himself "Pimp Juice" wrote a letter to the New York Daily News offering Paris Hilton a job as a high-class prostitute and promising she could earn over $50 million a year.

  • HA! She already spends that much on Chihuahua clothes.
  • She can't be a high-class whore! She's not high-class!
  • Paris Hilton, whoring herself for money?! What an absurd idea!


    NEW SEXUAL LIFESTYLE: "POLYAMORY"
    No, It's Not Parrot Love - Two researchers from London's South Bank University report there's a new lifestyle growing worldwide: polyamory. These are people who have multiple relationships at one time, but claim it's not casual sex because they're emotionally committed to all their partners and don't cheat on them. They even have a new vocabulary to describe it. Multiple paramours are "metamours;" a woman involved with them is an "ethical slut;" and feeling "frubbly" is the opposite of jealousy, where you feel friendly toward a lover's other partners. One researcher said she had two "primary partners" of either sex whom she lives with alternately, and two "regular lovers." She said they're all happy and their biggest problem is time management.

  • Oh, and herpes.
  • And avoiding their snoopy landlord, Mr. Roper.
  • That, and remembering whose name to call out in bed.
  • Before Viagra, time management was their second biggest problem.

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