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Tuna
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"Scream Queen Hot Tub Party"
Scream Queen Hot Tub Party (1991) was conceived, written, directed and produced by Fred Olin Ray and Jim Wynorski. It was shot on Hi 8mm in one day at Jim Wynorski's home. The women were given a piece of the profit, and Wynorski and Ray did their own distribution. As it never found its way into the rental market, this has always been a rather rare film, other than pirate copies. The plot is a throw-away. Five scream queens are invited to a mansion for a seminar on scream queens. The host isn't around, so they change into negligees, then use an Ouija board to figure out what to do. The answer? Get into the hot tub. Each of the women in turn describe some aspect of scream queen technique, such as the shower scene, chain saw play, firearms, the importance of exercise, etc. The entire thing was padded with clips from other films owned by Ray or Wynorski in which one or more of the girls appeared. These include footage from "Slumber Party Massacre," "Sorority House Massacre II," "Tower of Terror," "Emmanuelle V," "Evil Toons," "Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers." .
So, absent plot and acting, why would anyone watch this masterpiece? Brinke Stevens, Monique Gabrielle, Kelli Moroney (Zow Kelly Simon), Michelle Bauer and Roxanne Kernohan, all showing breasts. The women were all in great shape, and had the god sense not to take this seriously.
"Why did we have to change into nighties to reach the spirit world? DO spirits prefer nighties?" No, I think the producer just wanted an excuse to get us to undress."
"I was just thinking ..." "A scream queen never thinks."
The DVD includes a still gallery, a commentary with Ray and Wynorski, and One Million Heels B.C. 25 people have it at 1.5 of 10. I can't possibly give this less than a C. It is easily the best of all scream queen hot tub party films. The idea was so unique that all five girls had to agree not to make another film like it for any other director for at least a year. When others saw how much money it was making, all five girls were approached to make a clone for someone else. The video quality is not great, as the source material was 8 mm, but it is watchable, and the commentary is sometimes interesting.
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Brinke Stevens
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7,
8,
9,
10,
11)
Group
Kelli Maroney
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7,
8,
9,
10,
11,
12,
13,
14)
Michelle Bauer
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7,
8,
9,
10,
11,
12)
Monique Gabrielle
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7,
8,
9,
10,
11,
12,
13,
14,
15,
16)
Roxanne Kernohan
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7,
8)
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Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
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UPDATES:
- There are about 10 new OR updated volumes in the Encyclopedia in the
J's.
Eurotrip (2004):
I wrote a long, long
review which spoiled many of the best jokes. The review is
pretty funny, but my real suggestion is to do whatever you have to
do to see this movie, if it sounds like your kind of material.
Written by three Seinfeld writers, this is like an episode of
Seinfeld with the gloves off. It is raunchy, gross, offensive, sexy,
politically incorrect, filled with gratuitous nudity, and deeply
cynical. (But not mean-spirited) Of course, those elements make the
potential audience quite small, but if you are in that audience, as
I am, this is your movie, dudes! It also works like an episode of
Seinfeld by weaving all the themes and plots together. And it is
totally fucking hilarious, especially if you have lived in Europe
for a long time and know the truth underneath the crazy
exaggerations.
Non-stop nudity. I expect the DVD will have even more.
(These are not very good quality. Movie still in theaters, not
yet on home media. The actual DVD or theatrical print will be in
color, and none of these scenes will appear in B&W)
- Jessica Boehrs (1,
2)
- Edita Deveroux and Petra Tomankova (1,
2,
3)
- Molly Schade (1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6)
- beach extras (1,
2,
3,
4)
- sex club extras (1,
2,
3,
4) (every one of these girls has a last name
ending in -ova. Most of the European filming was in Prague,
although Amsterdam played itself, and there were also location
shoots in Germany)
C+. Highly recommended, if your type of movie. A hybrid between
Seinfeld and American Pie, but far raunchier than either.
OTHER CRAP:
-
Broadcast news networks say they'll carry Rice's testimony live.
-
Tarantino says he may do more with the Kill Bill characters.
- Here's a behind-the-scenes
featurette for
Alien vs. Predator
- Check out the NEW trailer for
Kill Bill: Vol. 2
-
Kerry promises Pennsylvania 433,000 new jobs. He also promised
an additional 13 zillion kajillion dollars to those who don't get
any of the new jobs.
- For the record, Pennsylvania would reach full employment
(estimated at 2% unemployment) with about 200,000 new jobs. In
order to reach the theoretically unattainable 0% unemployment,
they would need 320,000 jobs, so if Kerry creates 433,000 jobs
for them, they would have an unemployment rate of about minus
2%, and would need some people to work several jobs (and/or
significant immigration from surrounding states).
- At least he didn't promise 433,000 new jobs to Wyoming,
which would have required each and every member of the work
force to work about two and a half jobs. At least that would
keep them out of mischief.
-
Turkmenistan's president has told his people to shun traditional
false gold teeth in favor of white ones, the latest eccentric
command after moves to ban beards, ballet and circuses. Hey,
nothin' wrong with that. I'm with him 100% so far, as long as
mimes are covered under either circuses or ballet. The next steps
should be to ban house cats and metrosexuals.
-
Courtney Love admits to taking OxyContin, or as she calls it
"Hillbilly Heroin"
-
ABBA turns down a BILLION dollar offer to re-unite. As
spokesman for the group, Bjorn-Tor Mortensrud said, "we sucked
when we were young. Imagine how fucking bad we would sound now."
-
J-Lo to give acting lessons to film students. Gigli 101 is a
pretty easy course, but Maid in Manhattan 302 is said to be harder
than Organic Chemistry.
-
"Little-Known" Attractions of Lynchburg and Central Virginia.
Very funny site.
-
Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee may be planning a remake of their
marriage! The on-and-off couple may want to emulate Liz Taylor
and Richard Burton by ordering a second wedding cake. Rumors fly
that they are planning to get married at the next Mensa gathering.
-
Check out the reviews of Lynne Cheney's novel, Sisters
-
First 7-Eleven to open in Beijing. There are already 784
7-Elevens elsewhere in China!
-
Tower Records releases the first album from future Trivial Pursuit
answer, William Hung
-
Yahoo Launches Soul-Search Engine
-
Jon Stewart's report on Freedom of the Press - in Iraq.
- Watch the first eight minutes of
I'm Not Scared . "Something sinister is lurking under the
surface of 10-year-old Michele's idyllic summer in 1978. While the
days in his remote sourthern Italian village are filled with the
familiar routines of childhood, a chance discovery leads to a
shocking revelation. Now, suddenly beyond the point-of-no-return,
Michele digs further to find that even his own parents may be
behind what's quickly becoming the country's most nefarious
crime."
-
Barcelona votes to end bullfights. In other news, Italy bans
pasta.
-
Oddball stories from Countdown.
- Since Other Crap is known as the
Martha Stewart of the internet (without the insider trading, of
course), here's a must-have Easter link:
LearnPysanky.com - How to Make Ukrainian Easter Eggs (Pysanky)
-
False advertising.
-
CONDOLEEZZA'S BRAIN REDACTED. Painful Memories Erased Prior to
Testimony.
-
NYPD Blue's Charlotte Ross for PETA
-
At least - something worthwhile on this
Beckham story - his alleged girlfriend falls out of her top
-
Weak attention span attributed to television. Many scientists
believe that ... say, what kind of bird is that over there?
-
A woman has been arrested for flushing another woman's finger down
a toilet. The headline: "finger flushed after fight".
- A study of animals across the
world has confirmed what many men have long suspected and spammers
have long claimed -
a large penis can be a recipe for success in the mating game.
-
A Japanese restaurant which served sushi on the body of a near
naked woman has caused a storm of controversy in the conservative
southwest Chinese city of Kunming. The reports caused a
firestorm in the local and national press with many readers
slamming the novel dining trend as offensive and insulting to
women.
-
When at the prom, it's best to stick to your date - using duct
tape. An Idaho couple used duct tape, thrift-store jackets and
bed sheets to make their own formal wear for just $30. "
-
Claire Forlani in ASCII. View their home page for many more.
-
Hospital removes 176 pound tumor from Romanian woman.
Premininary conclusions are that the tumor was actually two
gymnasts.
-
Showsteelers, the cheer/dance team for the Birmingham
Steeldogs.
- Storyboards for
The Day after Tomorrow
-
Latino Review looks at the script for Ocean's 12.
- Attention nerds: you can now
schedule next year's vacation.
Star Wars episode three dates set
-
Drexler heads hoops Hall of Fame class of '04
-
Year by year tourney history for March Madness. Comprehensive
info.
-
Mathematician finds 90% probability of God.
-
Tennessee may become the first state in the country to ban the
viewing of obscene movies in cars. Unless, of course, the
porno movie condemns evolution.
- The young and the wedded.
Why stars marry younger than ever while the rest of us are waiting
longer than ever..
-
30 Best sexually suggestive Lines in the original Star Wars
trilogy
-
SlashNOT - Satire for nerds. Geek humor that matters. A parody of
Slashdot.
-
ACLU to Sue Government Over 'No-Fly' List " ...a class-action
lawsuit challenging the list of travelers that the government has
barred from flying because they're considered a threat.". So,
they're suing for the right to be a threat without interference
from the government?
-
The Daily Show looks at a man running for everything.
-
The Daily Show's "This week in God" - Lesbian Methodism
-
The Daily Show looks at illegal pets.
-
The Daily Show looks at gay marriage.
-
The Daily Show asks "what's the BFD about HDTV?"
-
The Daily Show looks at spam e-mail.
-
The Daily Show interviews Al Franken
-
Tom Hanks stops by the Daily Show.
- The trailer for
Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter... and Spring . "Anne Reid stars
as May, an ordinary grandmother from the North of England. When
her husband dies on a family visit to London, she recedes into the
background of her busy, metropolitan children's lives. Stuck in an
unfamiliar city, far from home, May fears that she has become
another invisible old lady whose life is more or less over. Until,
that is, she embarks on a passionate affair with Darren (Craig), a
man half her age who is renovating her son's house and sleeping
with her daughter. "
- The trailer for
The Mother. "Anne Reid stars as May, an ordinary grandmother
from the North of England. When her husband dies on a family visit
to London, she recedes into the background of her busy,
metropolitan children's lives. Stuck in an unfamiliar city, far
from home, May fears that she has become another invisible old
lady whose life is more or less over. Until, that is, she embarks
on a passionate affair with Darren (Craig), a man half her age who
is renovating her son's house and sleeping with her daughter."
-
The National Hot Dog and Sausage Council is predicting that
Americans will slurp down 24.2 million hot dogs this baseball
season. Or more, depending on how many Dodger games Kirstie
Alley can make
-
Texas prisoners no longer be will able to receive sexually
explicit material in the mail and their letters to the news media
and government officials can now be read by officials.
-
Harvard teacher bilks friends, falls for Nigerian e-mail scam
-
Mobog - where people send pictures directly from their camera
phones
-
Grease 3 with Olivia Newton John? - Oh, no-o-o-o-o-o!
- The official site and trailer
for
Dodgeball
-
Drag queens have been getting illegal, back-room injections of
industrial-grade silicone to give themselves some of the things
nature denied them when they were born male.. The silicone
used is the stuff sold in hardware stores as a sealant. It is not
sterile and can cause infections, particularly in the lungs.
-
Pentagon delays leave for 24,000 soldiers, decides to increase
military presence in Iraq.
-
Jennifer Lopez is no longer the only one in her family with a
million-dollar booty. Her mom, Guadalupe, 58, of The Bronx,
won a $2.4 million jackpot playing $1 slots in Atlantic City
Saturday night. It came 40 years too late. Back then she would
have been rich enough to have her tubes tied.
-
Healing Iraq - a blog from Baghdad.
-
Nader Fails to Make Oregon Ballot. Blames low turnout on
basketball game, not own douchebaggery.
-
Baseball Fans Overwhelmingly Want Mandatory Steroid Testing
- Four short videos from
SPICE TV RAW!
- Dalene Curtis was the playmate
of the month in June of 2001. Here is her free, nude
Playmate gallery, courtesy of PlayboyPlus.com!
- The cycle is complete.
Preseason No. 1 UConn downs Georgia Tech 82-73 to win national
title.
-
President Bush agrees that he will debate Kerry, but only on the
subject of whether Posh and Becks should split.
-
The Principality of Freedonia
- Whose words are these?
"Let us rid ourselves of the fiction that low oil prices are
somehow good for the United States. Jimmy Carter? Ralph Nader?
A member of the Saudi royal family? You're not even close.
-
The DVD Clinic Movie Review of Wild Things DVD. Bad news,
guys: no more skin in the "unrated" DVD, at least nothing obvious.
I'll look at it soon.
-
A review of Nora Ephron's screenplay for "Bewitched"
-
APOD: Category 1 Hurricane off the Brazilian coast. Largest
storm ever recorded in South Atlantic?
-
Mel's passion kicks butt in Asia, Latin America, not so much in
Europe.
- Let's skip all the political
bantering and accusations of racism concerning Jim Bunning's
comments that his Senate opponent looks like one of Saddam's sons.
What we want to know is the Other Crap. Does Dr. Dan look like
Saddam's sons, or doesn't he? Can you tell
which twin has the Toni?
Other Crap
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
Click
here
to submit a URL for Other Crap
MOVIE REVIEWS:
Here
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
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Shiloh
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Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
Victoria Abril
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One of the queenpins of international nudity (on
screen and off - she doesn't wear a lot of clothing in public,
either!), here is Miss Abril in Tie Me Up, which Tuna and I both
consider to be a must-see film from Almodovar. Bizarre, politically
incorrect, intriguing, and one of the most beautifully photographed
and art-directed films we have ever seen or captured. (.avi
version, .wmv version).
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Here she is in French Twist. (.avi
version, .wmv version). Long download, but lots o' nudity.
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Here she is again in French Twist, this time with
Josiane Balasko in some lesbotronic activity. (.avi
version, .wmv version).
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
Shiloh says:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
Scoop says:
I made the .wmvversions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
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Hugo
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Jennifer Connelly
(1,
2,
3,
4)
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The official babe of the the Fun House showing some brief nudity in scenes from "House of Sand and Fog" (2003).
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Lara Flynn Boyle |
"The Practice" star briefly shows off her super-pink nipples in scenes from "Afterglow" (1997). The normally ultra-thin actress looks like a total blimp in these 'caps...I bet she must have weighed 95 lbs back then.
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Dann
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'Caps and comments by Dann:
"Stealing Candy"
Low-budget doesn't always mean bad, and this 2002 direct-to-video effort is better than you might expect. While it has some nudity, it also has a decent plot and competent acting, so it rises above being simply a sexplotation film. In fact, the nudity and sex are minimal and tasteful, and simply required by the plot.
Three ex-cons devise the ultimate safe score kidnap a popular actress and make millions by forcing her to have live sex on the Internet. Things don't go as planned, of course, and some neat plot twists lead to an interesting ending. Decent enough to be worth a watch.
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The Gimp
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'Caps and comments by The Gimp:
A few A list "adult" stars for the Fun House today....
- Alaura Eden, close up breast and gyno views from that immortal classic "Ass Worship".
- Ryan Conner, close up breast and thong views from "Ass Worship 3".
- Jeanie Rivers, links 1-4 have breast and bum views, links 5-7 are hard core 'caps.
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7)
- Diana Espen aka April Flowers, the adult actress sometimes seen on Skinemax, baring all and gettin' it on hard core style in scenes from "Naughty College Girls"
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Variety
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Lara Harris
(1,
2)
Victoria Pratt
(1,
2)
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I missed a couple from the Crimson Ghost this weekend, so here ya go....
Lara Harris topless in scenes from "Inhumanoid" (1996). Note: she is not to be confused with Laura Harris from "The Faculty", "24" and "Dead Like Me".
and then...a couple of .mvs of fitness babe and "Mutant X" co-star Victoria Pratt in scenes from "Whatever It Takes" (1999). She was a little too muscled up back then, and looks a whole lot better now that she's more about fitness then bodybuilding...but still, she shows off her robo-hooters and some first rate thong views.
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Jade Leung
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7,
8,
9,
10,
11)
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'Caps and comments by Vejiita:
Here is the HK actress in scenes from the movie "Black Cat", the HK "remake" of "La Femme Nikita". She became famous for doing her own stunts, and some are pretty amazing. Sadly this is about as much nudity as she has ever done. However, she is still doing movies so who knows. Perhaps one day she will do more.
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Jamie-Lynn DiScala
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7)
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Señor Skin 'caps of "The "Sopranos" co-star in scenes from the TV movie "Call Me: The Rise and Fall of Heidi Fleiss". The nudity is from a body double, but Meadow still looks pretty good in skimpy clothes.
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Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
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Pat's comments in yellow...
NAKED POP SINGER NEWS ROUND-UP
Taste Malfunction - Alanis Morissette hosted the Juno Awards, Canada's annual
music awards, where she pulled a stunt to protest U.S. "censorship" sparked
by Janet Jackson's "wardrobe malfunction." Alanis dropped her gown and stood
onstage in a skin-tight body stocking with cartoonishly fake nipples and pubic
hair. She declared that there's "lots of fear" in the US, but she was proud
to be "in a land where we still think the human body is beautiful and we're not
afraid of the female breast."
The cartoon female breast.
Those actually were her own ridiculous nipples.
My only nudity-related fear is seeing Alanis Morissette naked for real.
All she proved is that sometimes, censorship is your friend.
Coming Soon To A Website Near You - MSNBC's Jeanette Walls reports that
Britney Spears did a private performance for some radio execs after a concert in
Miami and her breasts popped out of her skimpy top. An insider said, "The
flashbulbs really went off."
Especially since she left them out for the rest of the show.
Coincidentally, "Flashbulbs" is her nickname for her breasts.
After hearing her last CD, I think she'd better get used to dancing
topless for a living.
J-LO'S MOM HITS JACKPOT
The Rich Get Richer - Saturday night at the Borgata Hotel & Casino in
Atlantic City, Guadalupe Lopez of New York won a $2.4 million jackpot on a one-dollar
slot machine. The casino could not confirm whether the winner is Jennifer
Lopez's mother, but US Weekly and People magazines claim she is.
After all, how many women named Lopez could there be in New York?
She already hit the jackpot the day she went into labor.
She insists that even with the money, she'll still be "Guadalupe From The
Block."
SOY MAY PREVENT BALDNESS
It Did Wonders For Madonna - Colorado State University researchers discovered
that when digested, soybeans create a molecule called equol which protects
men from prostate cancer, acne, excessive body hair and even male pattern
baldness. They recommend that men start eating a lot more tofu, miso soup, soy milk
and fake meat instead of beef and pizza.
I think I'd rather be bald, hairy-backed, pimpled and cancerous.
Unfortunately, that's not male pattern eating.
Women eat like that, and they hardly ever suffer baldness, hairy backs or
prostate cancer.
WEIRD TALES FROM CAR LEASING AGENTS
A Party To Remember! - Nissan asked car dealers to name the oddest items left
in fleet cars returned at the end of their leases. They've found a week-old
bag of fish and chips, a mannequin, a chainsaw, a bulk supply of feminine
hygiene products, stockings, panties, a G-string, a microwave, condoms and a dead
goat.
And that was just in the glove compartment.
Moral: Never lease a car to Courtney Love.
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