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The Comedy Wire
Mexican telecom tycoon Carlos Slim Helu has knocked Warren Buffett out of the
second-richest person slot with a fortune of $53.1 billion, or $700 million more
than Buffett. Thanks to the booming Mexican economy, he's added $4 billion to
his fortune since last month. But he dismisses criticism that his Telmex
company is a monopoly and he doesn't give billions to charity like Buffett and
Bill Gates. He told Forbes, "Poverty isn't solved with donations," and building
businesses does more to help society than "going around like Santa Claus."
* That must be why all the people of Mexico prefer to
live THERE.
* So he's a greedy, monopolistic billionaire? See, another Mexican takes a job
that should belong to an American!
Monday, the Hard Rock Café chain unveiled plans for a $400 million Hard Rock
theme park in Myrtle Beach, Florida. The park will have tons of rock
memorabilia and a 10,000-seat theater with daily live music. It will be divided
into five "zones": British Invasion, Country Music, '70s Disco/Punk/Glam,
American Music and the feelings behind the music. There will be a '60s café, a
reggae theme water play area, and three roller coasters: one blasting '80s rock,
one playing Southern rock, and one based on an undisclosed rock band.
* It's the Rolling Stones Roller Coaster: it starts out
scary and exciting, goes through a lot of ups and downs, and ends up dull and
creaky.
* Here's a tip: avoid the Buddy Holly Airplane Ride. And the Tunnel of Courtney
Love.
Last night, Haley Scarnato was voted off "American Idol" after being
criticized by Simon Cowell for trying to cover up mediocre singing by showing
off her hot body.
* We then enjoyed a number by guest superstar, J-Lo.
On this day in 1954, Bill Haley & The Comets recorded "Rock Around The
Clock," generally considered to be the first "rock n' roll" record.
* Back then, "rock 'n' roll" meant "R&B played by a white
guy old enough to be your father" ... Just like it does now.
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