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Tuna
"Scorpion II"

Scorpion II (1998) is packaged on the same DVD as Scorpion, and the nudity details are exactly the same. Chiharu Komatsu shows her breasts, and a bunch of unknowns show breasts and buns. That is where the similarity ends however. Where the first film was a solid example of the WIP genre, this one is a jumbled mess. Komatsu keeps trying to kill one-armed men, because she thinks they are the one who killed her sister, but someone always does it first in front of her. Turns out to be the wrong low-life every time anyway.

One of the guys who kills one of her targets gets shot, and she patches him up, then enters the same prison she is a fugitive from with eyeglasses as a clever disguise, acting as a new prison doctor. She is to save the girlfriend of the man she patched up. During the big break, she discovers that he was actually the one who killed her sister, and that he had an arm transplant. He is shot (for the third time in the film) and she is holding him over the edge of a high bridge by the transplanted arm, which tears off and he falls to his death.

I wish I made the above up, but it is all true. Not only did they make a terrible mess of the plot, which includes mobsters who actually run the prisons, but they got artistic with the photography, making most scenes too dark to see. If you rent this double DVD, watch the first one, and take a big pass on the sequel. E-

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  • Chiharu Komatsu (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    "Cactus Flower"

    Cactus Flower (1969) marked the film debut of Goldie Hawn, in a performance which earned her a Best Supporting Actress Oscar. After watching this adaptation of a Broadway play, it puzzled me that her performance earned an Oscar, the only one to date, till I looked at the competition that year. Not that her performance wasn't good, but she has done much more in other films. Cactus Flower stars Walter Matthau as a dentist and Hawn's boyfriend, and Ingrid Bergman as his receptionist/assistant, who has always been in love with him. Matthau told Hawn he was married, to avoid her trapping him into marriage. He decides he wants to marry her after all, but she demands to meet his wife and make sure the divorce is ok. Matthau gets Bergman to play his wife.

    There are some funny moments, and Bergman is pure class, even in a part this frivolous. The ending is obvious just about as soon as the plot is set up, but the film has charm, and some good comedy moments. It may be the worst of Hawn's films in terms of exposure. We see her in the beginning in a pink nightie, but the most we can spot is part of one bun. IMDB readers score this one 6.7 of 10. For me, they didn't do much adapting to make it a film, but rather transplanted the stage play to a sound stage, however, the talent of the principles carried it off anyway. It is a must for Hawn fans, but is little more than a feel good romantic comedy. C+.

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  • Goldie Hawn (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Updates:

    Today we have new Naked Encyclopedia volumes for Lysette Anthony, Jane Fonda and Bridget Fonda!

     

    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that I inexplicably determined there might be something of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Graphic Response
    • Kelly Lynch, topless in "Desperate Hours". If you haven't read Scoop's review on this masterpiece, you should check it out. This movie has everything...Mickey Rourke playing a genius killer, Anthony Hopkins playing a suburban American dad, dialogue that makes no sense, and acting that looks like the final round of the Bill Shatner Memorial overacting contest!

    • Greta Scacchi showing all 3 B's in "The Coca-Cola Kid".

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website. www.graphic-barry.com.

    Scorpion's Skinemax
    Flower Edwards
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Showing off her breasts, bush, and even a little bit of bum as she gets it on in just about every way, shape, form and place in scenes from "Deviant Desires".

    Mason Marconi The former Pet and her big'uns, also in scenes from "Deviant Desires".

    Summer Fields Breasts, tattoos, a hint of pubes and pseudo-sex. One more look scenes from "Deviant Desires".

    Darcy DeMoss Taking a bubble bath with her clothes on, and then releasing the hounds for some silly pseudo-sex scenes. From the "Erotic Confessions" episode, "A Party of Two".

    Kimberly Rowe Breasts and bum in the "Erotic Confessions" episode, "An Erotic Christmas".

    The Night
    Monique van de Ven
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    The Dutch actress famous for her role in the Paul Verhoeven film "Turkish Delight", shows all 3 B's in scenes from "Keetje Tippel" (1975).

    Hannah de Leeuwe
    (1, 2, 3)

    The 'full figured' actress also showing breasts and bush in scenes from "Keetje Tippel".

    Liz Snoyink
    (1, 2)

    Topless in scenes from "De Lift" (1983).

    Celeblover
    Anke Schwiekowski Topless in scenes from the German comedy, "Mädchen, Mädchen" (2001).

    Diana Amft Also baring her breasts in "Mädchen, Mädchen".

    Ellen Ten Damme The Dutch actress topless in a sex scene from "Charlotte Link: Der Verehrer".

    Felicitas Woll No nudity in these scenes from "Berlin, Berlin" (2002), but does anyone else think she looks just like Zooey Deschanel, the older sister from "Almost Famous"?

    Ivonne Schönherr Teasing the camera with just a hint of nipple, and a bit of bum in scenes from "Berlin, Berlin".

    Jennifer Albano As far as I know, she's not related to Captain Lou. Here she is showing her breasts as she gets it on with Tony Soprano in the "House Arrest" episode of "The Sopranos".

    Lisa Martinek The German actress is topless in these scenes from "Der Mann von nebenan" (2002).

    Nadeshda Brennicke Another topless German...this time in scenes from "Vor meiner Zeit" (2001).

    Wookie Mayer From the German TV movie "S.O.S. Barracuda - Auftrag: Mord!". Thankfully when this Wookie takes off her clothes, she is not even remotely as hairy as the more famous Wookie, Chewbacca.

    Variety
    Nicci Juice
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    aka Rollergirl. Very sexy scans from the German GQ, by Blackshine. Links 1 and 4 have some see-thru nipple sightings with very high visibility.

    Mimi Rogers
    (1, 2, 3)

    Another look at her mammoth melons from "Full Body Massage". Great 'caps by nmd.