Tuesday

Tuna
"Snapshots"

Snapshots (2002) is enjoying its US premier direct to video this week. It is a romantic comedy with some unlikely casting choices that, for me, worked. This joint Dutch English co-production stars Burt Reynolds as an aging hippy living and running a book store in Amsterdam. He is pretty much a loner, and has a gruff exterior, but has a heart of gold. A would-be developer is trying to get him to sell the store, hoping to build a sex superstore, and Reynolds is the last holdout.

Meanwhile, Moroccan Julie Christie and her daughter Carmen Chaplin are living in LA, and the two are arguing over attendance at the wedding of Chaplin's father to a young woman. Mom threatens to keep Chaplin from taking an extended trip to Europe if she doesn't attend. Mom tells her not to go to Amsterdam, as it is not a good place for a young girl to be alone, but to try Venice instead. Naturally, Chaplin goes to Amsterdam, and ends up meeting, then working for, Reynolds. We slowly learn that Reynolds had one great love in his life, a woman in Morocco, who was already married. It becomes pretty obvious that Christy is that woman, and she has also been thinking about Reynolds all those years. Meanwhile, Chaplin is trying to "find herself." When Reynolds tells her to look in a mirror to find herself, she starts taking nude photos of herself to try and understand how people see her, and starts a romance with a young man who owns a photography store.

I had a little trouble with the concept of Reynolds as an aging hippy, mostly due to the parts I have seen him play, but he actually developed a character for this film. Christie was phenomenal as a Moroccan, and Carmen Chaplin looks great, has fantastic eyes, and has talent to spare. Of course, you could expect as much from Charles Chaplin's granddaughter. The film was shot mainly in Amsterdam, with some flashbacks in Morocco, and a few scenes in LA, so much of the scenery was fantastic. Gábor Szabó did the cinematography, so it was very nicely photographed.

14 people at IMDB have this at 6.2 of 10, which is not a bad score for a direct to vid. There are no on line reviews in English. Chaplin shows breasts, buns, and a hint of bush during her photo sessions. Granted, Reynolds as a bohemian ex hippy was a stretch, and the outcome is predictable, but getting there was a lot of fun, and I was rooting for the happy ending. This film is a good solid C. Fans of romantic comedy will enjoy it.

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  • Carmen Chaplin (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43)

    "Sudden Impact"

    Sudden Impact (1983) is the fourth in the Dirty Harry franchise, and was directed by Clint Eastwood, who, of course, also stared as Harry Callahan, the tough cop from San Francisco. This is my least favorite of the series, as it has no suspense at all. When learn the identity in the opening scene of the woman who is taking revenge for the rape of her sister and herself by shooting the perpetrators, first in the testicles, and then in the forehead. Harry is sent to San Paulo to investigate the background of the first victim, who was killed in San Francisco. In reality, his bosses just wanted him out of the way for a while, as his heavy handed police tactics were embarrassing them.

    So, she kills the evil doers, Harry solves the case, and there is lots of shooting and fighting along the way. Much of the film is very dark, making it difficult to watch, and even the surprise ending was predictable. The exposure was from Lisa London (H.O.T.S, Dragnet, Private Resort), who shows breasts as a hooker.

    IMDB readers have this at 6.1 of 10. Here is how the Dirty Harry films stack up:

    Dirty Harry  1971  7.6
    Magnum Force  1973  6.6
    The Enforcer  1976  6.3
    Sudden Impact  1983  6.1

    This film barely make sit as an actioner, and so C-.

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  • Lisa London (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Mailbox: (letters in white, my responses in yellow. Check it out, there are some pics in here, dudes.)

    Regarding Holly Marie Combs in A REASON TO BELIEVE... I saw an interview with her not too long ago where she talks about that scene. She said that they used a dildo to make it look more realistic when she was putting on the condom. Apparently, pantomiming it didn't look right (after all, it's difficult to put a condom on nothing), and of course she wasn't going to grab the actor's penis. When you watch the scene it's pretty obvious that it's a dildo because of the way she grabs it. I have a couple of video clips that show both versions of this scene. Let me know if you're interested.

    Sure, why not? Some guys expressed an interest in it.
     

    I would like to know if there websites containing articles about the devices used to place on the actors during the filming of nude love scenes ... things to prevent over-excitement by the actors. I know of the "baggies" used on NYPD BLUE.

    Cool question, but I don't have an answer. I'd like to know more about this as well. Need some help out there. Anybody? Bueller?

     

    Was watching the series 'Helen of Troy' last night on USA and at least in Part 1, there is an EXTENDED scene of backside nudity as well as numerous see-throughs of the main actress, Sienna Guillory (The Time Machine). Any caps or even a movie would be awesome.

    Here is one of her in Helen of Troy. Here are some of her in a previous movie. (1, 2)

     

    Anything on Constance Zimmer from Good Morning Miami?

    To my knowledge, she's done no public nudity of any kind. Here are some caps from the show, and here's her best public appearance. (1, 2, 3)

     

    Hey Scoop, Nudity Report on some recent rentals.

    I agree with Hankster's review of Bog Creatures.  I often will rent movies if they actually list "Nudity" as part of their ratings, which this one did. I happen to be a big fan of Topless Girls Being Chased, but there wasn't enough of it, and it was photographed with a lot of movement. Otherwise, the movie was disappointing, especially since the cast was attractive. It did have a  nice castle, which looked real, even if the location was unlikely. Just to mention one of several stupid points: "do you really wear short-shorts on a dig in Denmark?"  I think the "making of" part of the DVD mentioned that other names had been considered for the film, so you might see it show up under another name. One reviewer for the IMDB says it reminds her of "a high school video project."

    Another recent rental, Cheerleader Massacre (as reviewed by Tuna) had the best nudity in the one-and-only deleted scene, which Tuna
    didn't to mention. It was a fantasy 3-way/bath, complete with lesbian kisses and chocolate syrup. It probably was shot for another movie, since it didn't have any of the same actresses.  It did have the one-and-only full frontal nudity, except for a  possibly accidental peek in the shower scene. It seems like they were trying  to avoid any full frontal shots as they shot the ever-present locker room shower nudity, as all of the scenes shown from the front had the metal  shower controls blocking anything. Except you can see the very bottom of porn star Diana Espin's beaver below the shower controls. If it wasn't  accidental, why did they frame the shots that way, and why not just show the
    whole enchilada (or taco, in this case)?

    The last one was Darkwolf, which also listed "Nudity" in the Ratings. It  starts out with some topless strippers, so I thought that would be the extent of it.  Well, yes and no. There was a nice topless scene with a  photographer's model. Then there were some "naked girl morphs into werewolf" scenes that used CGI for most of the nudity.  But they actually gave extended screen time to a naked actress (a double credited as "she-wolf").  Of course, she was very hairy, had wolf-like features, and seemed to be wearing a colored pubic patch, that actually looked real, so it might as well as have been the real thing. In fact, when she is grabbed from behind,  there is a quite realistic spread-shot. Probably the best nudity is a scene with the aforementioned topless model  and another girl, who are photographed completely nude, wearing only some interesting body painting. They again seem to be wearing pubic patches, but  since they are also painted, the effect is the same as if they weren't wearing patches at all. Which raises the question: "why wear them anyway?"

    Copperhead

    Thanks for the info

     

    Scoop - is it true that there are topless paparazzi pictures of Catherine Zeta-Jones about 8.99 months pregnant?

    Yes. I'm not sure how interesting they are to anyone, and they are sort of unattractive because she was smoking in some of them, Zeta-Jones and Douglas are suing people over them.

     


    Updates:

    • Updated volumes: Bridget Fonda, Anna Friel, Sadie Frost

     

    Other crap:


    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Graphic Response
    • Goldie Hawn, breasts and almost frontal views in a bath tub scene from "Wildcats".

    • Maggie Gyllenhaal, gorgeous full frontal nudity from "Secretary".

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website. www.graphic-barry.com.

    BFD
    Angela Winkler Topless in scenes from the 1975 movie "The Lost Honor of Katharina Blum".

    Chiara Caselli Full frontal nudity in scenes from "Al di lŕ delle nuvole" aka "Beyond the Clouds" (1995).

    Inés Sastre Also from "Beyond the Clouds"...the Spanish actress goes topless.

    Sophie Marceau Full frontal and rear nudity in one more collage from "Beyond the Clouds".

    Helena Bonham Carter From one of her first movie roles, the British actress in a dark topless scene from "Lady Jane" (1986).

    Halle Berry
    (1, 2)

    From "Monster's Ball". Cleavage and pokies in #1, gettin' it on with Billy Bob in #2.

    Halle Berry More Halle...this time her topless and undies only scenes from "Swordfish".

    Jacqueline Bisset No nudity, but the British actress looks fantastic in these scenes from "Le Magnifique" (1973).

    Julianne Moore
    (1, 2)

    The multi-Oscar nominee nude in scenes from two movies. Link #1 features breast and bum exposure in scenes from the Madonna movie "Body of Evidence" (1993). In link #2 we see her topless in love scenes from "The End of the Affair. (1999).

    Nicole Kidman A tripple B performance! Breasts, bum and bush in scenes from "Billy Bathgate" (1991).

    Vejiita
    Amy Lynn Baxter
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    One word...yummy! The busty blonde in a bikini, topless and hosing herself off in scenes from "Golfballs!" (1999).

    Justine Priestley
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Sister of "90210" star Jason Priestley baring her bum and showing a bit of breast exposure in scenes from "Up Against Amanda" (2000).

    Sean Young
    (1, 2)

    Topless in two movies. Link #1 features scenes from "Men", link #2 features 'caps from the movie "Out of Control".

    Variety
    Simone Kessell
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    A special thanks to everyone who helped us answer the reader mail from yesterday. By request, here is the Kiwi actress topless in scenes from "Stickmen" (2001). Vidcaps by C2000.

    Anna Ammirati
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

    From the movie "Monella" aka "Frivolous Lola", written and directed by Euro-nudity legend Tinto Brass. Of course if it's a Tinto movie you know there is plenty of toplessness, bum views and close ups from the gyno-cam!

    Krista Allen The former "Emmanuelle"-turned-legit-actress showing a truck load of cleavage on a recent episode of "Fastlane". Thanks to Gman.

    Francesca Rettondini The beautiful Italian actress shows breast and bum exposure in vidcaps by PK Orion from "Ghost Ship" (2002).

    Julie K. Smith
    (1, 2)

    The busty B-movie babe and former Pet (February '93) pouring chocolate syrup all over her breasts in scenes from "Cheerleader Massacre" (2003).

    Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    CANNABIS: THE ASPIRIN OF THE 21ST CENTURY?
    What Have They Been Smoking? - Scientists at the Institute of Neurology in Queens Square, London, say it's becoming apparent that cannabis has "huge potential" as a medical drug and may protect the brain from degenerative, age-related diseases such as Parkinson's, Huntingdon's and Alzheimer's. One said the latest research showing the therapeutic benefits may result in cannabis becoming the "aspirin of the 21st century."

  • As in "Toke two, and call me in the morning."
  • The investment of the 21st century: Hostess Snack Cakes Inc.
  • Even if you do get a terrible neurological disease, smoke enough pot and you won't even care.
  • So how come when you're stoned, it's a lot like HAVING Alzheimer's?


    McCARTNEY WILL NEVER RETIRE
    Oh, Let Him In! - Paul McCartney said he's never going to retire from being a musician. He said if people don't want him to play concerts anymore, he'll play in small town pubs; and if the pubs throw him out, "I'll keep on singing outside the door."

  • And patrons will keep telling the owner, "Someone's knockin' at the door...Somebody's ringin' the bell."
  • He figures if it's good enough for Andrew Ridgeley, it's good enough for him.
  • Better yet, if the pub throws him out, he'll buy it and throw the former owner out.


    MADONNA TRICK BACKFIRES
    What A Tease! - Madonna tried to teach illegal music file sharers a lesson by pretending to release all 11 tracks from her new CD at madonna.com, but they were really just recordings of her saying, "What the f--- do you think you're doing?" It backfired when one angry computer buff hacked into her site, posted the message "This is what the f--- I think I'm doing," and left links to a site where the real songs could be downloaded illegally for free.

  • The moral: never hack off a hacker.
  • Why would anyone think Madonna's the kind of girl who would give it away for free?
  • Why doesn't she just go back to making records that are WORTH paying for?


    KOURNIKOVA DEMOTES HERSELF
    I Want To See Her Do The French Open! - After four first-round defeats in five tournaments this year and dropping from 8th ranked to 67th, Anna Kournikova is taking a big step back to lower echelon tournaments for the first time in seven years. She's hoping it will help improve her skills, the way it did for Andre Agassi, who returned to win the French Open. But sports writers wonder how long companies will keep paying Kournikova big endorsement money when she's playing obscure minor tournaments.

  • That depends on what they're selling.
  • Hey, smaller tournaments, smaller outfits!
  • Well, they kept paying her through seven years of losing big tournaments.
  • Also, her pictures may stop appearing in Vogue and appear only in Swank.