Darling (1965) stars Julie Christie in an Oscar Winning performance as a London model who is the epitome of the beautiful people. She sleeps her way to the top of the London fashion scene, and eventually marries an Italian prince. This film was a stab at the contemporaries it depicted, and was considered an important film. It won a total of three Oscars, was nominated for two others, and cleaned up at the BAFTAS. IMDb readers have it at 7.1.

As the film opens, Christie is married to an underachieving man whose idea of success is mastering a foreign language tape for their next vacation. When she meets a BBC writer and show host, she finds him irresistible. She finally wins him away from is wife, only to find a rich TV film producer. When she finally marries the older Italian prince, she discovers that, somewhere along the way, she has misplaced her dignity and happiness.

In an odd scene near the end, Christie strips facing a mirror. We get a long look at her buns, and her breasts are visible in the mirror. It is a medium long shot, but this is Julie Christie, arguably the most beautiful woman of the time. There is no doubt that this was her film. Her performance earned the Oscar, beating out Julie Andrews in Sound of Music. While I recognize the strengths of the film and understand its importance in poking fun at the free wheeling 60s jet setters, I found it a very long watch at 128 minutes. Part of the problem is that these are simply not my kind of people, and, like unwanted guests, I couldn't wait for them to go away. This is, obviously, a minority view. A little humor would have helped, and the 60s music was markedly absent, which is odd for a social satire. This is a C+. If it is your sort of drama, it is very well made, and stars a beautiful woman in an Oscar winning role.

Other Crap:

• Three new clips from House Of Wax
• The trailer for Heights
  • "'Heights' follows five characters over twenty-four hours on a fall day in New York City. Isabel (Elizabeth Banks), a photographer, is having second thoughts about her upcoming marriage to Jonathan (James Marsden), a lawyer. On the same day, Isabel's mother Diana (Glenn Close) learns that her husband has a new lover, and begins to re-think her life choices and her open marriage. Diana and Isabel's paths cross with Alec (Jesse Bradford), a young actor, and with Peter (John Light), a journalist. As the interrelated stories proceed, the connections between the lives of the five characters begin to reveal themselves and their stories unravel so that Isabel, Jonathan, Diana, Alec, and Peter must choose what kind of lives they will lead before the sun comes up on the next day."
• Wal-Mart Targets Student Parody Site. The retailer summarily smashed the powerful threat, which received nearly 400 hits in its first four days. Wal-Mart's annual revenues, by the way, are more than $250 billion dollars per year. If it were a country, it would have a larger economy than Switzerland or Austria! (What I want to know is this - how the fuck did they find a website getting a hundred hits per day? The only thing I can come up with is that the guy must have hot-linked to their graphics, which showed up in their logs.)
• New virus erases all Romanian gypsy music from your hard drive. At last, a virus with some potential! Now if they would just tweak it a bit to erase Cher, Yoko Ono, and Clay Aiken, they'd be cookin' with gas.
• Under a proposed Alabama bill, public school libraries could no longer buy new copies of plays or books by gay authors, or about gay characters. I'm shocked, shocked by the implication that there are actually some books written by straight people! I reckon the only book left in Alabama libraries will be that autobiography written by Jose Canseco. Well, I guess Alabama will save a lot of money that might have been wasted on those dusty old libraries. The bill's author originally wanted to ban even some Shakespeare, until he realized that nobody in Alabama would actually read anything written by Shakespeare.
• See if you can figure out the speaker and subject ... "He's generous to a fault, giving and kind," she said tearfully. "A great father, great with kids ... a brilliant businessman." It is a PROSECUTION witness describing Michael Jackson. Man, that DA is really assembling a powerhouse case against Jacko, eh? If he had brought it to trial a couple of months earlier, Jacko might have been elected pope.
• Listen to NPR's complete Springsteen inverview
• create your own "Visited Countries" map
• Charlie the Hamster Sings the Ten Commandments
• Julia Roberts has been named the most beautiful person in Hollywood by the American Association of the Deaf and Blind.
• "On May 4, the Epicenter Gallery in San Francisco will become the site of the world's first Whore College, to teach wannabe working girls and guys the ins and outs of prostitution. The kinky college is the brainchild of prostitute and sex activist Carol Leigh and will offer classes in titillating topics like Beauty Standards and Sex Work, Do-It- Yourself Web Cam and Safer Oral Sex Techniques."
  • I don't know. Sounds too similar to Radcliffe
• A MAN caught his wife working as a high-class hooker after he saw her ad in a newspaper.
  • When he called her up, she said: 'What can I do for you, big boy? I will do the things your wife won't.'
  • Distraught Uwe Peters shouted down the phone: 'But you are my wife, you tart.'"
• Russian Cosmonaut Says Vodka Should Be Allowed on ISS . Because in Soviet Union, the jokes tell you.
• The most accurate graph ever drawn.
• The NCAA foorball championship just got even more complicated, and no more likely to produce a clear champion: BCS opening up automatic bids to every conference
• iPods blamed for spike in subway crime
• Robert Rodriguez will be shooting back to back sequels for SIN CITY 2 and 3 starting February of next year
• Maddox: I am better than your kids. More crappy children's art.
• The Daily Show's Samantha Bee investigates whether firing smokers will lead to firing albinos, or the office whore.
• The big list of Celebrity Addresses. How to contact almost anyone famous. I suppose it is their agent's office in most cases. (I looked. Maggie Gyllenhaal is not there.)
• The Daily Show: "Bush meets with Prince Abdullah of Saudi Arabia and confirms that he's queer for oil."
• Weekly World News: "NEW SPRAY MAKES HOMOSEXUALS INVISIBLE TO GAYDAR!"
• Borowitz: "IDENTITY THIEF RETURNS IDENTITIES DEEMED WORTHLESS" "Losers," Fumes Angry Hacker
• Horse head pillow. "A custom severed horse head plush that is actually quite comfortable to sleep on, albeit a tad on the south side of morbid."
• Letterman's Top Ten Questions To Ask Yourself Before Camping Out To See "Star Wars"
• Straight Dope Staff Report: What's the deal with the three wise men?
• The Weekend Warrior's box office predictions and analysis for this weekend. He predicts: (1) XXX with 28 million (2) Hitchhiker with 23 million (3) The Interpreter with 14
• This week's movies (NY and LA only): 3-Iron - 80% postive reviews. Another of this week's small, arty releases with good reviews.
• This week's movies (NY and LA only): Ladies in Lavender - 90% positive reviews. This is the Judy Dench costume thing which takes place in Cornwall. Calling it elegant and classy, the critics praised the performances, the beautiful music, and the settings
• This week's movies (NY and LA) The Holy Girl -90% positive reviews. Spanish language coming of age film loved by the artier critics. If you're actually interested, the New York Times did a thorough review.
• This week's movies: XXX: State of the Union - 17% positive reviews. Many reviews are contemptuous. "XXXcrement," e.g.
• This week's movies. Reviews were all over the board for Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - 53% positive reviews. Everything from love to hate to "wtf?"
• Best re-make idea since Affleck and J-Lo's plan to remake Casablanca ... Michael Bay plans to remake Hitchcock's The Birds
• The Spurs played like angry mofos - 63-32 lead at halftime, might have won by 50, but emptied the bench.
• Rosie O'Donnell launches a crusade against the Letterman Show. Oh, man, look at that picture. I wish she weren't a lesbian, cuz she is HOT!

Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap

MOVIE REVIEWS:

Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

Or....review the results of our previous polls:
The Top 20 Nude Scenes of 2004
The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 80s
The Best Nude Film Debuts of the 90s
Which actress has been the most convincing playing a stripper.
Who has the best bum in Hollywood?
Best All Time Television Comedy
Best Nudity in an Oscar-winning performance
The Top 20 Best Straight Sex Scenes

Today from the Ghost, a whole bunch of video clips from "Genie in a String Bikini" (2004). Wrtitten and directed by lo-budget guru and Fun House hero, Fred Olen Ray.

• Kennedy Johnston and Beverly Lynne some serious lesbian lovin in 1-3, plus 3-way action (with heavy lesbo lovin') in the rest. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

• Kennedy Johnston, baring all 3 B's while gettin' it on. The sex in vids 4-5 doesn't look that fake! (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Adult star Nicole Sheridan baring all while doin' it in a variety of positions. (1, 2, 3, 4)

• Nicole Sheridan is joined by another adult star, Dolorian, for so lesbian love with leather and bondage. (1, 2, 3, 4)

Wild Things has become a formula, and this third of the batch sticks to the formula pretty closely.

Rich spoiled-brat 18 year-old girl schemes with poor across-the-tracks girl to screw somebody out of a lot of money, in this case her evil stepfather. They have lesbian sex, three-way sex with a male co-conspirator, and eventually get out-schemed by other schemers.

While Wild Things 2 was a pale imitation of the original, this third effort is pretty good. Every element is there, so of course there's not a lot of surprises, but for some reason it simply works better than 2; the acting is better, the script is better, and it's probably closer to the original than the second one.

Regardless of how you felt about the second movie, if you liked the original, you won't hate Diamonds in the Rough. I do suspect that some (but not all) of the nudity by the two female stars used body doubles, but even so, they looked great.

• Sarah Laine & Sandra McCoy
• Dina Meyer
• Unidentified

MICHAEL JACKSON UPDATE: DEBBIE ROWE TESTIFIES
See You Later, Incubator - Michael Jackson's ex-wife Debbie Rowe testified Wednesday. To the D.A.'s dismay, she said her video defending him wasn't rehearsed, and she wants to be reacquainted with him because "he's my friend." But she did admit she made the video in hopes she'd get to see her kids for the first time in 2-1/2 years, and she lied in praising his parenting skills. She also admitted they never lived together, and she signed away her parental rights in 2001 because her multi-million dollar custody agreement was too complicated and allowed her to see them only for eight hours every 45 days, at a hotel, under a nanny's strict supervision.

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