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Tuna
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"Antonia's Line"
Antonia's Line (1995), named simply Antonia in The Netherlands, the country of origin, won the Best Foreign Film Oscar. It is a delightful story of a matriarchy, started by Antonia (Willeke van Ammelrooy) and her daughter Danielle (Els Dottermans). The film begins as WW II ends. Antonia goes back to her home town to bury her mother and raise her daughter. Her daughter comments, "It isn't much" when she sees the village. Antonia says, "That's what I thought when I left, and it hasn't changed much." They settle into a farming life, and acquire guests over time, such as the village idiot, a retarded woman after she is raped by one of her brothers, a woman who loves being pregnant (Wimie Wilhelm), the village priest, when he leaves the church, etc.
Danielle announces one day that she wants a baby. When questioned, she decides she doesn't want a husband, just a baby. Antonia explains that the local country men just make boys and follow cows, so takes her to the city to find a man. This sets up the famous scene where she wears the guy out doing it time after time, then stands on her head naked to make sure the sperm gets to the right place. This works, and she gives birth to a brilliant, beautiful daughter. Eventually, history repeats itself, and the daughter becomes pregnant.
These are just the highlights. If you haven't seen this film, you are really missing something. Although, as in real life, some tragic things happen, this is a very uplifting, affirming film that will have you constantly smiling. Els Dottermans shows everything, Elsie de Brauw, as her lesbian lover and her child's t4eacher shows breasts, and Wimie Wilhelm also shows breasts. IMDb readers have this at 7.4 of 10. This is a foreign language film with subtitles and a very feminist story, yet I adored it. It is clearly a B.
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Els Dottermans
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7,
8,
9,
10,
11,
12,
13)
Elsie de Brauw
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6,
7,
8,
9,
10,
11)
Wimie Wilhelm
(1,
2,
3)
"Flesh and Lace"
Flesh and Lace (1964) is a difficult film for me to categorize. Made by Joe Sarno, it is probably early exploitation, and sort of a roughie. The story centers around two establishments. The first is a club with B girls who hustle drinks and a craps game in a back room. The other is a toy store/loan sharking business. Heather Hall is the newest employee at the bar, and is too shy to attract men into buying drinks. She is hanging on to her job by a thread, mainly because her roommate and coworker (Judy Young) is sleeping with the boss. Rook (Phil Mason) comes back to town with enough cash to pay of his markers, and starts back up with Judy Young. Young throws Hall out on her ear when she catches her with Mason.
That is when Hall meets Joe Russell, the toy shop owner, and moves in with him. She has gone from shy to a nympho. Since the plot isn't terrible complex, I will stop here. Russell shows her buns, and is in lingerie frequently. Robin Marks, as one of the club dancers, shows breasts, and buns through sheer panties.
There is no IMDB score as yet for this Something Weird release, and no reviews or comments. Thew transfer is pristine and I somewhat enjoyed seeing 50's looking women and 50s attitudes, but this is not a film that would entertain most people. If the genre is exploitation, this is a D, not because it is badly made, but because of the story.
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Heather Hall
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Robin Marks
(1,
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9,
10,
11,
12,
13,
14,
15,
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17,
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22,
23)
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Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
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Note:
If you had problems with the clips from Baadasssss! yesterday,
they should be working correctly now - find them in the back issues.
OTHER CRAP:
-
Halle selects the next man who will cheat on her.
-
Former Van Halen frontman David Lee Roth will add the unlikely
title of emergency medical technician to his resumè.
-
Bruce Willis wants hair!
-
The trailer for Pauly Shore is Dead . "Hollywood
comedian/actor Pauly Shore loses everything: his house is gone,
nobody in Hollywood wants to represent him, he moves back home
with his mom, and is now parking cars at the Comedy Store. Then
one night when he's up in his mom's loft, a dead famous comedian
appears who tells Pauly to kill himself cause he'll go down as a
comedic genius who died before his time. Pauly then fakes his own
death, and the media goes crazy. Celebrities are talking about him
on MTV and girls are fighting over him on Jerry Springer. It's
everything that he wanted...his plan worked. A week or so later
the LAPD is tipped off about his whereabouts and they break down
the door of the seedy motel room that he's hiding out in and throw
him in LA County's celebrity wing."
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President Clinton's My Life presented as a powerpoint presentation
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The six rules to adapt a comic book into a good movie.
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Hillary Clinton, and some serious pokies. Oh, yeah, did
I mention that the pokies belong not to Hillary, but to Natalie
Portman.
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Fahrenheit 9/11, as reviewed by The Filthy Critic. "So
here it is: I think George Bush is a fucking asshole. I also think
Michael Moore is a fucking asshole. Bush is the probably the
bigger one, but he didn't make a movie."
-
FilmJerk.com's Early Report for June 27. 2004
- Now this is what makes soccer a great sport.
Sexy Football
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Iowa to Southern Miss: you stole our logo. For
reference ,
here is Iowa's long-standing logo, and
here is the new one for Southern Miss
-
Will the Great White Way be blacked out this summer.
-
The trailer for National Treasure: "The film is a caper
story about a secret code in the U.S. Constitution that reveals
the whereabouts of a treasure buried during the 1700s. Nic Cage
plays an archaeologist-historian on the hunt for the treasure."
- In the entire history of baseball, since 1876, no team has
ever been 18 games or more below .500, then climbed back over .500
until yesterday, when the Tampa Bay Devil Rays did it.
You have to think Lou Piniella is earning his salary.
-
Fahrenheit 9/11 wins the weekend with an uncanny $25,000 per
screen. Dodgeball did well, and was still within a
stone's throw of first, reaching $67 million in total. Shrek 2 is
still going pretty strong, just short of $400 million! Damn,
that's a big number. Spidey 2 opens next week and will change the
ballgame.
-
Shaq says "I'm like toilet paper" Well, he is kinda
soft and absorbent, but toilet paper probably makes a higher
percentage of free throws.
-
Ten amazing scenes for Spidey fans
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New Yorkers addicted to sex. 8% of New Yorkers are sex
addicts, an amazing statistic, because the other 92% are heroin
addicts and can't get it up.
-
Bush's comment on Cheney Obscenity: "Shit Happens. Now watch this
drive."
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COTE, the Coalition Of Terrarium Enthusiasts, once seen as a prime
Nader supporter in the 2004 race, announced Friday they would
instead be endorsing an iguana named 'Lizzie' Nader's
campaign advisor said, "He feels betrayed. Those nutbars were the
heart and soul of his campaign."
- Borowitz:
Vice President Dick Cheney scandalized the United Kingdom today,
cussing out Queen Elizabeth II in what observers said was his most
profanity-laden tirade to date.
-
Green Party Refuses to Back Nader for President. Say
Sayonara to Good-Time Ralphie
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Some great, unintentionally funny headlines.
-
Michael Moore thinks the Democrats suck almost as deep as Bush.
And as for Nader? The portly populist also trashed "good-time
Ralphie" because, "he doesn't give a [bleep] about anybody but
himself."
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TRANSCRIPT OF "LONG-OVERDUE" EXCHANGE BETWEEN VICE PRESIDENT DICK
'CHRISTIAN VALUES ROLE MODEL' CHENEY AND RAGE-CONSUMED LIBERAL
SENATOR PATRICK LEAHY.
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Leading actresses to show some skin in Broadway's Dracula.
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Play Scissor-Paper-Rock with Richard Simmons!
Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
Click
here
to submit a URL for Other Crap
MOVIE REVIEWS:
Here
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
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Shiloh
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Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
NOTE: because of a unique combination of
circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial
bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip
format. Left click on the files as you normally would to view a
picture. When
you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in
the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.
I know this is not especially convenient, but it
allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from
hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some
reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not
play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory
work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this
new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want
to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips
altogether.
Rosanna again
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
Shiloh says:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
Scoop says:
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
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Graphic Response
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- The beautiful Mädchen Amick bares all 3 B's in scenes from "Dream Lover" (1994). (Just recently released on DVD)
- Sally Field showing off a first class bum in the early Ah-nuld movie "Stay Hungry" (1976).
Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website. www.graphic-barry.com.
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Oz
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'Caps and comments by Oz:
"Murder in Mind"
Murder in Mind is the typical 'based on a true story' TV movie so there's little nudity. Some pokies and underwear by Jennie Nauman, Angie Ohren and Kristin Davis.
"Atomic Train"
Kristin Davis had a minor role in the very lame Atomic Train. No nudity but she looks good in her jumper.
"Alila"
Over to Israel for Alila, one of the more pointless movies you'll ever see. Yaël Abecassis' nakedness is the only highlight.
- Yaël Abecassis
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5)
"Garage Days"
Continuing eastwards and on to Australia, we have Garage Days. Some nice nips shown by Pia Miranda and Yvette Duncan. Natalie Jain plays the stripper but the credits have Cassandra McCann as the body double. I couldn't work out where one comes in. Cassandra might be in the more athletic scenes and Natalie in the topless scenes. There are also some sexy images of Maya Stange and Holly Brisley.
- Pia Miranda
(1,
2,
3)
- Yvette Duncan
(1,
2,
3)
- Natalie Jain (with some body double work by Cassandra McCann)
(1,
2)
- Maya Stange
(1,
2,
- Holly Brisley
"Blurred"
Still in Australia but there is no nudity in Blurred, just pokies by Nathalie Roy. Marea Barker is the stripper but we're not around long enough to see the full strip.
- Nathalie Roy
(1,
2)
- Marea Barker
(1,
2)
"The Healer"
Back to Europe, although with an Australian actress Miranda Otto naked, we have The Healer, which is a co-production of several countries. Some movies have very poor credits, not listing some performers. This is the opposite. We only see Ginger Bergland's naked behind but she's in the credits. Likewise for Wioletta Kolokowska, who is a naked car accident victim.
"Anna's Summer"
Down to the Mediterranean we have the Greek Anna's Summer. Maria Skoula is topless and there's some see-through nudity by Angela Molina.
- Maria Skoula
(1,
2)
- Angela Molina
(1,
2,
3)
"Profession of Arms"
Still in the same area, we can see a topless Sandra Ceccarelli and Dessy Tenekedjieva in the Italian film The Profession of Arms (aka Il Mestiere delle armi)
"Swedish Beauty"
Finally, up to Scandinavia and we can see Swedish Beauty. Unfortunately, very little nakedness just some sexy caps of Jenny Ulving and Nadine Kirschon.
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Variety
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Susan Sarandon
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6)
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Fantastic toplessness in scenes from 1978's "Pretty Baby".
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Kristen Johnston
(1,
2)
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Showing some serious pokies in scenes from an episode of "3rd Rock from the Sun".
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Cristi Harris
(1,
2,
3,
4,
5)
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Señor Skin 'caps from the direct-to-vid movie "Kiss of Death" (1995). Chances are you've never heard of her, but she does look pretty darn good topless.
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