Some more great film clips:

An imager named Dead Red did these three outstanding zipped .avis from The Devil's Advocate. This is a great combination. The film clips are high-definition, superior to DVD quality. The women are beautiful, famous, and naked full-frontal (Charlize Theron and Connie Nielsen). The movie is a classic escapist picture with a hammy but charming performance by Al Pacino as Satan. (Movie House Review). In the first clip, Theron strips stark naked in church. In the second, Nielsen strips naked to seduce Keanu. In the third, Keanu makes love to his sweet wife (Theron), but fantisizes about his satanic half-sister (Nielsen), and we see the breasts of both actresses.

Stage Beauty attempted to pick up on some of that Shakespeare in Love vibe by looking at the key moment in English theater when women were first allowed to play women's roles. The question it raises is: "So what happened to the guys whose entire livelihood - playing women in stage - was legislated away?" It's a decent movie, in the good-not-great category. I probably liked it more than you will. (Movie House Review). Claire Danes chose this film to expose her breasts for the first time on camera. (Well, the first time she showed them intentionally. One nipple was seen in a downblouse in Polish Wedding.) Our readers chose Claire's work in Stage Beauty among the top ten nude scenes of 2004. In the first clip, Claire whips out a breast for a portrait painter. In the second, her breasts are visible in a downblouse during a sex scene.

A nudity classic. A topless Erika Eleniak pops out of a cake in Under Siege in this zipped .avi. Amazingly enough, I have never written a review or done captures from this film, and I never loaded Tuna's notes into the Movie House, but Tuna wrote the following, and I agree with it:

Under Seige (1992) is described on the package as "Die Hard on a ship." The ship is supposedly the Battleship Missouri. The part of Bruce Willis is played by Steven Seagal, who has been demoted to the position of ship's cook, probably because of a little misunderstanding over his having rearranged the face of his commanding officer. Of course he is really a Navy SEAL, expert in ...  well, whatever is needed to get through the plot.

A chopper full of entertainers and caterers arrive, supposedly from Pearl Harbor, to throw the captain a birthday party. Included in the guest list is a centerfold, Erika Eleniak, to jump out of a cake. Erika is what she appears to be, but the rest of the group actually consists of the baddies, led by a turned CIA agent and the Missouri's executive officer. Their aim is to take over the ship, offload some nuclear missiles to a submarine they happen to own, and sell them to the highest bidder. This is all the more ironic as the Missouri is on her final voyage to be decommissioned. Of course it is up to Seagal, with the help of Eleniak, to stop their nefarious scheme.

I enjoyed it. The Navy policies and procedures won't stand much scrutiny here, but it was a good, fast-paced yarn, and Seagal, whom I usually find irritating, was better here than usual.

C+. IMDb readers have this at 6.1. It was nominated for Oscars for Best Sound Effects and Sound Editing. It earned $156M against a $12M budget.

David Cronenberg's Crash is a love-it-or-hate-it kind of film, and I have done both. It is relentlessly downbeat, humorless, and totally "off the wall." It exists in an alternate universe which looks like ours might look if God were a madman. I didn't much care for Crash the first time I saw it, especially since it takes itself so seriously,  but I came around because it is just so unique and imaginative. I wrote, "This movie is like Andy Kaufmann's comedy: it never winks and comes out of character and tells you everything is OK. It wants you to hate it, because if it works, a normal person should hate everything about it. This film might repulse you, in fact it should repulse you, but you can't deny its imaginative power."  (Movie House Review). There is a lot of nudity, some of it presented in such a demented way that it isn't remotely appealing, but the highlight is the full frontal scene in this zipped .avi - with crotch close-up - from Deborah Unger.

 

Other Crap:

Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.

Tina Aumont

Rush Limbaugh was detained for more than three hours Monday at Palm Beach, Florida, International Airport because he had a bottle of Viagra without a prescription.  He was finally released without being charged, but the sheriff plans to refer it to state authorities, who say it could be a second-degree misdemeanor.  Limbaugh's attorney said he has a prescription for the Viagra, which is for his personal use, but the doctor didn't put his name on the label for the sake of privacy.

*  They confiscated his Viagra and let him go. That's two reasons why he won't have to do hard time. 


As part of a public toilet cleanup campaign, Singapore wants to improve their toilet cleaners' "low morale and low skills."  To turn them into proud professionals, they are importing Japanese experts in toilet technology to teach a three-day course. Graduates will earn the title of "restroom specialist."

*  It's hard earning a degree in bathroom studies.  You have to do a lot of
reading.  Mostly magazines.

*  If I wanted to go to school just so I could end up cleaning toilets, I'd
get a liberal arts degree.



Many Catholics questioned how divorcee Nicole Kidman was able to marry Keith Urban in a Catholic Church.  The BBC reports that Kidman was advised by church officials that she didn't need an annulment because her first marriage was in the Church of Scientology.  Since the Vatican doesn't
recognize that as a religion, in their eyes, her 10-year marriage to Tom
Cruise was a sham.


*  Proof that the Catholic Church is definitely right about at least one
thing.
 
 
Moose, the Jack Russell terrier who played Eddie on "Frasier," has died at 16-1/2, or 115 in dog years.  Like many stars, he had a shady past: his trainer Mathilde Halberg was called as a last resort after he kept running away and chewing up things, and he was sent to the pound's death row for killing a neighbor's cat. . 

*  Pretty much the same backstory as Alec Baldwin.