My Condition...

It was the extreme shortness of breath that got my attention. I was admitted to the hospital in atrial fibrillation with a heart rate of 180. They rather quickly drained 1.4 liters of bloody fluid from my right lung. They have subjected me to dozens of tests, and ruled out many possible causes of this, but they still don't know what went wrong. I am still in atrial fibrillation, but with a heart rate under control using 3 drugs. I am home waiting for some of my medication to reach the proper level in my system, then I may have another hospital stay to try and convert my heart to normal rhythm.

I am able to spend some time at the computer, and am again reading my Email.

Tuna

1941 (1979):

Spielberg's only significant misfire. I wrote a rather long  review with some pictures, which is best read here.

The nudity scoop is brief but sort of interesting. The opening scene of 1941 is a very close copy/parody of the opening scene of Jaws, except that the midnight swimmer is disrupted by a Japanese submarine rather than a shark. In both movies, the skinny dipping swimmer with the voluptuous figure is played by the same actress: Susan Backlinie. (Swimming and diving stunt work was her specialty.)

• Susan Backlinie (1, 2, 3)

Other Crap:

• What's the greatest American rock band of all time?
• Amazing new study shows that your favorite Lucky Charms marshmallow bit shape determines what you're like in bed!
• Brian De Palma may direct a prequel to The Untouchables.
• The trailer for Sympathy for Lady Vengeance "The third film Chan-wook Park's revenge trilogy following 'Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance' and 'Oldboy'."
• Britain's Prince Harry had blood test to prove Charles was father. WTF. Look at the ears. It was either Chuck or Dumbo.
• Super-Thin Lindsay Lohan Collapses
• I didn't make this up: U.S. Government rules that the "Siegfried and Roy" attack was not the work of terrorists!! They have also ruled out beehive hairdos. I didn't make that up either.
• Ex-Presidents Bush, Clinton Play Golf
• NPR pays out some hefty salaries!
• Another cast member from "Real World Austin" joins the handcuff brigade.
• Silence is Golden - the AMC Theater warning about cell phones.
• Comedian Pablo Francisco riffs on movies
• Atlantic City frets over thought of losing the Miss America pageant to Nashville
• Now that's funny! Developer wants to use new Supreme Court ruling to eminent domain Souter's house!!!
  • "Could a hotel be built on the land owned by Supreme Court Justice David H. Souter? A new ruling by the Supreme Court which was supported by Justice Souter himself itself might allow it. A private developer is seeking to use this very law to build a hotel on Souter's land. The CEO of Freestar Media, LLC, points out that the City of Weare will certainly gain greater tax revenue and economic benefits with a hotel on 34 Cilley Hill Road than allowing Mr. Souter to own the land."
  • The developer plans to call it The Lost Liberty Hotel
• American scientists create robot lobster. Unfortunately, North Korean scientists have countered our plan with robot drawn butter.
• Statement of the Shrink League: "It is irresponsible for Mr. Cruise to use his movie publicity tour to promote his own ideological views and deter people with mental illness from getting the care they need" ... "Instead, he should use the tour to promote OUR ideological view and allow us to drain those loonies of the money WE need. What the hell do they need money for? They're nuts! They'd just spend it all on silly straws and those noisemakers from New Year's Eve"
• The Daily Show: "The on-the-ground evidence, or as we like to call them, 'facts' suggest Cheney might be incorrect."
• Patently Absurd: "Totally Absurd Inventions ... America's Goofiest Patents!"
• Dead Pets - They Never Run Away!
• Iowa State University's Tasty Insect Recipes
• Become more macho or risk your extinction, men told ... Symptoms of the illness that has been dubbed "mantropy" include a penchant for pedicures, fruit smoothies and small dogs.
• Mao: the Untold Story. A review of a book on the life of Chairman Mao: "the whole official history of the revered founding father of Communist China is a myth written to cover up the evil of a monster". A few samples:
  • Mao and his leading comrades never actually marched, since they were carried in litters and were generally treated "like landlords."
  • Mao never tried to pit his Reds against the Japanese: He was too busy plotting to destroy his own rival commanders and to maneuver Stalin to help give him control of China on a plate.
  • In Yenan in 1941, Mao funded his operations by turning 30,000 acres of fertile land to opium production.

  
  
  
   

   

• The Weekend Warrior makes his predictions for the upcoming weekend. He's callin' it $60 mill for Spielberg and Cruise, and nine mill for Martin Lawrence.
• "PRESIDENT TO NAME YODA HOMELAND SECURITY CHIEF" ...
  Bush refuses to change his mind even after learning Yoda isn't real
• Letterman's "Top Ten Rejected Titles For Saddam Hussein's New Novel"
  • "Inspectors Turn up no Evidence that Herbie was Ever Fully Loaded"
  • "The Brotherhood of the Traveling Underpants"
• NEWSBREAKERS When News Breaks, We Bust It. These are the crazies who try to sneak themselves into the background of live news reports. Their many costumed characters include the Cheese Ninja.
• The poster for the dystopian thriller from the Wachowski Brothers, V for Vendetta, which stars Portman and Agent Smith. It's like a futuristic version of Zorro, except with a V instead of a Z.
• This week's movies: Rebound - no reviews yet. A sports comedy with Martin Lawrence as a college basketball coach who is a mastermind with an uncontrollable temper, ala Bobby Knight. Banished from the college game, he is able to get only one coaching job - at a junior high school that lost its last game 109-0.
  • (This film will appear on 2300 screens, War of the World on 3600)
• This week's movies: War of the Worlds is rated 100% positive at Rotten Tomatoes, although no major reviewers have checked in yet, but there is something curious going on here. It is only rated 6.8 at IMDb.
• The trailer for Cry Wolf.
  • "Nobody believes a liar - even when they're telling the truth. When a young woman is found murdered, a group of local high school students decide to further scare their classmates by spreading online rumors that a serial killer called "The Wolf" is on the loose. By describing "The Wolf's" next victims, the students' game is to see how many people they can convince - and if anyone will uncover the lie. But when the described victims actually do start turning up dead, suddenly no one knows where the lies end and the truth begins. As someone or something begins hunting the students themselves, the game turns terrifyingly real."
• "My exorcisms get results"
• TOM CRUISE BIDS FAREWELL TO EARTH ... Returns to Planet of Origin on Eve of Film's Debut
• Star Trek episode concept of the week: "The Giant Radio Lobes of Fornax A"
• Paula Abdul near death after grueling nail salon ordeal.
• UK tries to close the "power couple public embarrassment" gap! Hugh and Liz are at it again. "Liz was flirting with Hugh all night. We couldn't believe it when she grabbed Hugh's hand and started sucking his finger suggestively."
• Weirdest amazon.com item yet. Weighing in at 700 pounds, with a current retail price of eight large, it's all 1082 books in the Penguin Classics Library!!
   
   

Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap

MOVIE REVIEWS:

Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

It's an all "Hankster Light" today.

Once again we set the controls of the Time Machine back to 1974...this time to take a look at the marvelous Angie Dickinson in in the Drive-In classic, "Big Bad Mama"!

Angie bares it all in several scenes...including a love scene with Fun House hero, Bill Shatner! Never could figure how they got her to this one.

• Angie Dickinson (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

One our way back to the present, we stopped by 1975 for quick peek at Laura Gemser topless in 'Black Emanuelle".

• Laura Gemser (1, 2, 3)

Finally today, we return to the present to enjoy some nice cleavage from Pamela Anderson & Jenny McCarthy in "Scary Movie 3".

• Pamela Anderson & Jenny McCarthy (1, 2, 3, 4)

A little bit of variety from the Ghost today...

First up, 'caps and vids of the husky-voiced Linda Fiorentino showing a little skin in two movies.

Here is Fiorentino topless, baring a bit of bum and showing off her legs in scenes from "The Last Seduction".

• Linda Fiorentino 'caps (1, 2)
• Linda Fiorentino zipped .wmvs (1, 2, 3)

Here is Linda again, this time showing only partial side/rear breast views in scenes from "Liberty Stands Still" (2002).

• Linda Fiorentino 'caps
• Linda Fiorentino zipped .wmv

Next up, some assorted video clips.

• Missy Cleveland aka Amanda Cleveland (zipped .wmv). Here is the former Heffer (April '79) topless in a shower scene from the Brian De Palma film "Blow Out" (1981), starring John Travolta and Nancy Allen.

• Paula Prentiss (zipped .wmv). Here she is going full fronatl in scenes from "Catch-22" (1970).

• Heidi Sorenson (zipped .wmv). Another former Heffer baring her robo-big'uns on screen. The unusual factoid about this clip is that she did the Heff-mag thing 14 years before taking her top off for this love scene with C. Thomas Howell in "Suspect Device".

• Sondra Locke (zipped .wmv), bares breast and bum as she is attacked by a bunch of bad guys in scenes from the Clint Eastwoond western, "The Outlaw Josey Wales" (1976).

SCIENTISTS BRING DOGS BACK FROM THE DEAD
"DOG" Backwards Is "GOD!" - Scientists at Pittsburgh's Safar Center for Resuscitation Research made a major breakthrough: zombie dogs! They created a technique in which a dog's blood is drained and its veins refilled with ice-cold saline. Its heart, breathing and brain all stop, making it clinically dead. Three hours later, they replace the blood, give the dog an electric shock, and it comes back to life, perfectly normal and with no brain damage. They hope to do human tests within a few years.

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