Friday

Movie News!
This tidbit landed in the Scoopy mail bag...Apparently there is a French movie causing a bit of controversy due to it's content. My personal guess about the only thing that would piss of the French would be that a movie with bunch of Americans slaughtering their language, living in Versailles, Kentucky (pronounced 'Ver-sales') insulting Jerry Lewis, and insisting that California wine is the only wine! But the Associated Press reports differently. Our questions to all of our Euro fans..."What is the name of the movie?", and "Where can we get some vidcaps?"

PARIS (AP) A violent, sexually explicit movie that opens with a harrowing rape scene has outraged France's political conservatives and provided a rallying point for defenders of artistic expression.
Last week, France's Council of State, responsible for interpreting rules and regulations, declared the film pornographic and said it could incite violence, exiling it to the country's few X-rated theaters. The film's title (which would not be publishable in most newspapers) is an obscene sexual command.
Two mainstream distributors defied the ban by showing the movie to adult audiences, risking large fines.
The film, which was screened at the Cannes Film Festival in May, passed almost unnoticed until a citizens' group with links to the far right complained it was unsuitable for minors.
France's film critics have panned the movie, with the respected Le Monde daily newspaper calling it "a sick film." The weekly Le Nouvel Observateur said it "throws sex in your face to sell blood and gore."
The film is the story of two young women (played by a former prostitute and a pornography star) who team up in a rampage of mindless sex and violence. Directed by Virginie Despentes, the movie purportedly is meant to reflect society's brutal treatment of women.
Movie distributors Marin Karmitz and Galeshka Moravioff told French media they would reject the ban. Karmitz said by telephone that he would not be muzzled by far right groups. "I'm continuing to show the movie because the council's decision undermines freedom of expression and could have serious consequences, not only for the French cinema, but for the arts in general," he said.
Theaters risk fines of up to $51,000 for showing the film. The debate has been front-page news for a week in France, where artistic freedom often goes unchallenged, and nudity is commonplace on television.
Culture Minister Catherine Tasca told RTL radio on Wednesday that she would introduce "as soon as possible" a proposal for a new under 18-prohibited rating that would allow the film to remain in general cinemas and not be X-rated. After learning of Tasca's intentions, Karmitz said theaters would hold off showing the film until the new rating takes effect.
French director Catherine Breillat has accused the Council of State of overstepping its role as protector of the constitution. "Now there exists a higher body that has given itself the right to impose censure: it just took waving the specter of pornography and the protection of moral values," she wrote in petition signed by dozens of film personalities.

Brainscan
Vanessa Williams
(
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)
All comments in this section by the Brain
These, the last Penthouse scans of Vanessa Williams, provoke a comment and a question. Years after the pictures were published I read of the furor they aroused and saw that among all the self-righteousness there was a perfect quip, from of all people Joan Rivers. She was quoted as saying that whereas stripping Ms Williams of her Miss America crown might appear reasonable it also seemed fair, given the nature of the pictures, that she be named Miss Congeniality. Woulda gotten my vote. Now for the question: who is the woman that appears with Ms Williams? She fulfills all the criteria of celebrity, so far as I am concerned: her image is famous and because of her contribution to the demise of Vanessa's reign, she is a public figure as much as the bims who brought down rich and powerful men. So boys, anyone out there know the name of this pretty young woman (young at the time, at least)?
Tyra Banks
(
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Speaking of someone had to do it, here is a series of Tyra Banks scans from Victoria Secrets catalogs and one from her calendar. These are the most revealing images of what has to be the best looking woman on the planet.
UC99
Julie K. Smith
(
1, 2, 3)
More massive mammaries from the Andy Sidaris classic (aren't they all) "Day of the Warrior"!

Ok, so I was checking out the Andy Sidaris website (yes, there is one) and I saw that they are now offering to all loyal fans the Director's Cut/Collectors Editions of "Hard Ticket to Hawaii" and "Picasso Trigger". Pardon me, but....The Director's cut is the version that truly depicts the vision of the film maker, the ultimate telling of the story if you will. But Andy...that requires that you actually HAVE a story to begin with! And please, don't give me any BS about how "the studio changed everything"...You produced, edited and distributed this thing yourself! 'The man' wasn't exactly 'keeping you down' I'm sorry to say. So, let's cut through the bull, call it soft core porn and put it in the room in the back of the video store and get on with it.
Digitally remastered and new packaged versions of "Citizen Kane" or "Casablanca"...those I'll buy and be willing to pay a premium for the Director's Cut. But not movies that features chicks with guns on the cover! Even I have standards!

Sylvia Kristel
(
1, 2, 3, 4)
Vidcaps NOT from "Emmanuelle". Amazing, by true. Here she is from the 1976 film "Alice". #1-3 are topless only, but #4 has some nice full frontal.
Oz
Paula Jai Parker
(
1, 2)
Comments by Oz:
Let's begin with two collages of Paula Jai Parker in the pleasant enough movie "Woo". There is a reason for the strange looking costume. Paula's boyfriend in the movie decided he'd like to see Paula dressed up as a chook. This included all the actions such as flapping her arms like a chook, walking like a chook and clucking like a chook. She then has to eat like a chook. This involves her sitting on him and pecking the pop corn off his chest. Whatever turns you on I suppose!
Polly Shannon
(
1, 2)
Two collages of Polly in "Hard to Forget". In this movie she plays a woman who 'disappears' to South Africa. She is, however, discovered by what turns out to be her love interest in the movie. It is an enjoyable movie. In a couple of the pictures it looks like she is badly in need of a feed - just look at her ribs and arms!
Serenity
(
1, 2, 3, 4)
The remaining collages are all from various episodes of Wild On. As you can see, in Australia we are fortunate to have the uncensored version. I'm not sure what the titles of the episodes are. I don't think it matters as all episodes are almost the same, only the background's are different.
Here we have porn star Serenity appears in four collages. The first two are from somewhere in the Caribbean where clothes seem to be optional. Yes, she is playing Nude Twister in a couple of the pictures. The next two are from somewhere in the Mediterranean. The first of these shows Serenity posing for a photographer and, in the second, she is flashing for a group of admirers.
Stephania Swinney
(
1, 2, 3)
Stephania is some sort of exotic dancer/model/actor from Italy. In this Wild On episode, the Venetian artisans were demonstrating their skills by producing a sculpture of Stephania in glass. The final collage shows the result, although not too clearly.
and ...
Claire King
(
1, 2, 3)
From "The Cold Light of Day", by Watty.
Kirsten Maryott
(
1, 2, 3, 4)
Vidcaps from "The House on Todville Road". Never heard of this one, but nice topless stuff from a very attractive starlett.
Terri Harrel One more from "The House on Todville Road".




Members Bonuses

a Working links in the members' page, text-only in the AdultCheck version

"Fire on the Amazon" (limited release 1993, shot in 1990)

Cheapozoid Roger Corman flick about the disappearing rainforest. The film is only 75 minutes long, and about half of it is a digression that takes place in an Indian village. Here's the general idea. A famous indigenous environmentalist is killed. Although it is obvious that the money interests wanted him out of the way, the murder is performed with an arrow to feign an indian attack, and the local police somehow arrest a taciturn indian who "hangs himself" in his cell after signing a full confession. When his fellow tribesmen come for his body, a local North American environmentalist (Sandra Bullock) and a magazine reporter (Craig Sheffer) try to talk to them, but they are unresponsive so, on the spur of the moment, the Americans follow the indians up the river to their reservation.

Pause. Let's think about that. Sheffer and Bullock see the indians paddling upstream, so they comandeer a canoe and follow. They don't know the terrain, they don't know how far it is, they have no supplies, they don't even have insect repellant, and they're in a stolen canoe paddling through the unfamiliar jungle, surrounded by crocs, snakes, bad guys, and stone age tribesmen. When Sheffer is shot, their canoe overturns, and they just decide to saunter through the rainforest in a random direction, even though night is approaching, they are soaking wet, and Sheffer has a gunshot wound. Well, as luck would have it, they are captured by indigenous people who possess secret herbs that cure the wound, who perform an autopsy on the guy who "hanged himself", thus proving he was dead before the hanging, and who possess more secret herbs that make Sandra Bullock want to make nice-nice for hours with the reporter (whom she had previously detested).

Now that the ice is broken, the lovebirds are constantly stealing a kiss on the corner of dirt roads, or in sleazy taverns filled with environmental terrorists and competitors in the Anthony Quinn lookalike contest, and all of this romance is pursued with the same nonchalance you'd have with your best girly on the streets of London.

This must take the award for the most abrubt ending ever. Bullock and Sheffer are pursued by about a zillion heavily armed bad guys, including all possible legal authorites. When they are trapped on a dock, with only about a minute left in the film, Sheffer's buddy (who we met for only a minute in the opening scene) arrives in a seaplane to rescue our lovebirds. Unfortunately, Bullock dies from her wounds, but not before making a tearful deathbed speech in the plane, after which the word slides tell us about how much of the rainforest is lost each year, followed by the credits.

The production values are loathesome. The photographic quality is about equal to your home movies, and the sound track is both inappropriate and cheesy. In other words, the director defied the odds and managed to ruin a bad script.

I guess you know by now that Sandra didn't really show much, but here's what she did show. There is a bit of aureola on display in collage #1, maybe even part of a nipple, but Sandra has said that she had her nipples taped for this scene, so I don't know exactly what we are looking at. Maybe some Pebbles and Bam-Bam band-aids. In some of the other collages her breasts are hanging downward, apparently unfettered, but the scene is dark. Incidentally, it seems there are still several minutes missing from this cut. The original unrated cut was 85 minutes. Bullock (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

"The Big Lebowski" from Tuna

I like Coen brother's films, and The Big Lebowski is no exception. Jeff Lebowski (based on a real friend of the Coen's) is stuck in the late 60's. He is a pot smoking, bowling, easy-going slob who happens to share the same last name with a millionaire, but goes by "Dude." When two goons mistake the Dude for his millionaire namesake, and beat him up and urinate on his carpet trying to collect a debt, he gets drawn into a kidnapping and no end of double-crossing. Some blows to the head and some good dope provide justification for some truly unique dream sequences. Most of the characters in this film were written around actors and actresses the Coen's wanted in the film. You get the feeling everyone had fun making this film, and I had fun watching it. Performances are great throughout, and there is even a little nudity from Julianne Moore and Tara Reid. John Turturro is especially memorable as Jesus the bowler.

Thumbnails

Julieanne Moore (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7) Tara Reid (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

"Embrace of the Vampire" from Tuna

Embrace of the Vampire is nearly unanimously seen as a poor film. I agree. First, the Vampire is a total wimp and a whiner, and we don't even get to know why he is at the school, how he knows Alyssa Milano has the soul of his 200 year old lost girlfriend, or why he is dying. There is lots of nudity (mostly Milano) and simulated sex, but the only real passion is provided in a short appearance by Jennifer Tilly. I can't help but compare this to a Rollin film. It has lesbians, naked women, vampires, castles and slow pace. It even has a symbol. What is missing then? Rollin's films are full of memorable images, and amazing colors. Rollin is visually stunning, where Embrace has good figure photography. Milano's performance did pick up near the end, when she stopped being the all American virgin, but, by then, I was nearly asleep.

The Nymphs are Glori Gold, Shawna Ryan and Sabrina Allen, but I have no idea which is which. I do have to say that this film provided a large number of high quality images. The DVD transfer was very good, and has 4 versions. Letterbox/fullscreen of both R and UNRATED.

Thumbnails Thumbnails

Alyssa Milano (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34) Jennifer Tilly (1, 2) Charlotte Lewis Nymphs (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

Graphic Response

Carole Laure, "Get Out Your Handkerchiefs" Elizabeth Ashley- "Paperback Hero" Natacha Regnier "Dreamlife of Angels" Sylvia Kristel, "Emmanuelle"

In addition to the pictures that go with these daily member's bonuses every day, the subscription area now has two years' worth of back issues of the Fun House, plus the rasslin' babes site, the fakes, the Fun House, the Encyclopedia, and the Mardi Gras pics. Click here to sign up or get info

a
Members Bonus




Click Here!