Friday

Film clips: Connelly Mania, Part 3 of 3:

  • Jen's nudity from Of Love and Shadows. This was her second topless scene, following The Hot Spot. It's a full minute of sex with Banderas, but has WAY too much Banderas and too little Connelly. In that entire minute, Connelly shows nothing more than a quick escape of a single breast.  (Zipped .wmv). 
    • The film is a political "thriller," minus the thrills, about the military coup in Chile in 1973. Or maybe it's a love story with the coup as a backdrop. Whatever. It's based on a book by the daughter of Allende, the elected President who was overthrown by Pinochet. (Movie House Review).

     

  • All of Jen's nudity from Requiem for a Dream consists of a few seconds with nearly zero motion, but it's a rare glimpse of her pubic hair. (Zipped .wmv). 
    • This is a brilliant "drugs suck" film with a show-offy 2000 edits, one which careens wildly back and forth from outrageous, broad satire to intense, harrowing melodrama. It never found a market, primarily because Aronofsky refused to make any changes for the MPAA, so it was released "unrated," nearly tantamount to no release at all. I'm not sure it would have found a market anyway. It's one of the most impressive movies I've ever seen, and is rated #54 of all time at IMDb, but it's so depressing that I hope never to see it again. (Movie House Review).

     

  • Jen's final career nudity to date, from The House of Sand and Fog. Three scenes. First we see her nipple through a transparent bra. Then she has a sex scene with Ron Eldred, and offers a rare look at her butt. Finally, one nipple visible under water in the suicide scene.  (Zipped .wmv). 
    •  This is another depressing film from the cry-of-the-month club. This one is basically just a tragiploitation film in which Connelly is establishing herself as the Susan Heyward of the new millennium.  (Movie House Review).

 

 

OTHER CRAP:

It's August 18th, and ... you're on notice:


 

GRACE Cock-Flavoured Soup
  • Lindsay Lohan loves it. Jodie Foster? Eh ... no so much.

Seven clips from Hollywoodland, the film about George Reeves, TV's Superman.

The trailer for Let's Go To Prison, a comedy from Bob Odenkirk, the Mr Show guy.

Four clips from Harsh Times, a crime thriller with Christian Bale and Eva Longoria

The trailer for Al Franken: God Spoke, a documentary about Franken's metamorphosis from whatever he used to be (comedian?) to whatever he is now (gadfly? politician?).

The trailer for Surviving Eden, The Movie, which is currently scheduled to open in four theaters.
  • Loser loses all... in "Surviving Eden," a sardonic send-up of reality television and the culture that devours it. In the tradition of "Waiting for Guffman" and "Take the Money and Run," a documentary film crew captures the pitfalls and pratfalls of fame as reality show winner Dennis Flotchky (Michael Panes) is thrust into the whirlwind world of instant celebrity. Dennis, a fat, charismatically challenged assistant manager of convenience store, becomes a contestant on reality show Surviving Eden when his roommate Sterno (Peter Dinklage) enters him into the casting competition as a joke. In spite of his utter lack of personality and ability, underdog Dennis develops a cult following and ultimately wins the competition. One million dollars richer and 150 pounds thinner but none the wiser, Dennis quickly and hilariously falls prey to the machinations of the Hollywood celebrity maker and the vultures and hangers-on that accompany it.

A clip and the trailer from Crossover, a new basketball film.

The trailer and six clips from Sherrybaby
  • Three years after entering prison for robbery as a 19-year-old heroin addict, Sherry Swanson (Maggie Gyllenhaal) begins her first day of freedom, clean and sober. A model prisoner who has undergone personal transformation, she immediately sets out to regain custody of her young daughter Alexis (Ryan Simpkins), who has been cared for in her absence by her brother Bobby (Brad William Henke) and his wife Lynn (Bridget Barkan). Unprepared for the demands of the world she's stepped back into, Sherry's hopes of staying clean, getting a job, and becoming a responsible mother are challenged by the realities of unemployment, halfway houses, and parole restrictions. Bobby and Lynn's concerns about Sherry's ability to care for Alexis, and her inability to prove them wrong, threaten to destroy the already delicate relationship she has with her daughter, as well as her newfound sobriety. Disillusioned and haunted by wounds from her childhood, Sherry is eventually confronted with life-altering questions about her own survival and what it means to be a good mother. Ultimately she learns that as the harsh realities of life often get in the way of her best intentions, sometimes it's best to take life one small step at a time.

The trailer from a guide to recognizing your saints
  • "A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints" is a coming-of-age drama about a boy growing up in Astoria, N.Y., during the 1980s. As his friends end up dead, on drugs or in prison, he comes to believe he has been saved from their fate by various so-called saints.

The trailer for History Boys, an award-winning British play which has been made into a movie
  • "The History Boys" tells the story of an unruly class of bright, funny history students in pursuit of an undergraduate place at Oxford or Cambridge. Bounced between their maverick English master (Richard Griffiths), a young and shrewd teacher hired to up their test scores (Stephen Campbell Moore), a grossly out-numbered history teacher (Frances de la Tour), and a headmaster obsessed with results (Clive Merrison), the boys attempt to sift through it all to pass the daunting university admissions process. Their journey becomes as much about how education works, as it is about where education leads.

Hillary Offers to Housesit for Bush ... Would Water Plants, Read Presidential Briefings in Oval Office

Some great signs from around the world
  • Note on the non-English sign: "Die Knüller des monats" is a perfectly normal phrase in German - it means "the scoop of the month," and might be used in a newspaper or magazine. Nothing funny about it at all - in German. However, this is a Swedish web site and it seems funny to them because "knull" is the Swedish equivalent of "fuck."
  • If I remember my Scandinavian languages correctly (and I'm rusty, so I may be wrong), the joke actually works better in Norwegian, where knuller is an actual verb form. (I think it is "knullar" with an "a" in Swedish.)

Excellent animated version of Poe's The Tell-Tale Heart, narrated by James Mason

Amazing police video: The Best Getaway Driving Ever

"One fingered salute" vent design draws ire from neighbors

Teen actor Haley Joel Osment faces up to six months in jail on charges that he was driving drunk and possessing marijuana

Film superstar Mel Gibson was sentenced to three years'probation and a year of alcohol abuse treatment

Colbert looks at the Connecticut senate race

The latest update on Hungary's Steven Colbert bridge

Colbert: The Berlin Wall: was it really that bad?

Colbert makes his case to be Cuba's next leader

The Daily Show is fortunate that correspondent Rob Corddry is Macacan

Jon Stewart discusses President Bush's interest in Albert Camus's The Stranger

Jon Stewart rips on CNN's anti-terror coverage.

The new Buddhism? Buddhist monks brawl at peace protest

The Allen and Glenn show
  • Strangely entertaining oddball comedy/magic act

Another fun night out with Lindsay and her mom

Altoids makes the gayest commercial ever

The trailer for The Marine, starring wrestling superstar John Cena

Rumsfeld Admits He'd "Totally Dig" a Foursome with Dixie Chicks

A rare interview with author Philip K Dick

Return of the Ghostbusters (official trailer for a fan film)

The forger who fooled the world

Letterman: Top Ten Signs Your Bought A Bad Computer
  • Runs on Windows '78
  • Tech support number is a Silicon Valley Applebee's
  • For better internet reception, salesman includes pair of rabbit ears

Some crazy technology: The Supersonic Shape-Shifting Bomber

Joe Lieberman will run as a turtle

"Hybrid mutant" found dead in Maine.
  • Damn you, evil scientists. Isn't it bad enough that you create mutants and hybrids separately? Must you combine them? I say we close your mutant-breeding farms forever.
  • Well, except for the one that made Rebecca Romijn in X-Men. He's obviously not an evil scientist, but is doing the Lord's own work.
Drunken, naked teen interrupts Bible study
.
  • Here's the best part: the Bible study was in a bakery. I guess they were studying the Sermon on the Mount. I hope there was a fishmonger nearby.

George Allen's "macaca" statement

 

 

Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.

 

Angel Guts: Red Porno (1981)

Angel Guts: Red Porno (1981), or "Tenshi no harawata: Akai inga," is the fourth in the Nikkatsu Angel Guts series. This time the action was directed by Toshiharu Ikeda from a screenplay by Ishii, the creator of the characters and the scenarist on several in the series. Ishii and Ikeda became lifelong friends during this film. 

Ikeda is interviewed in the special features, and his interview is a "must watch." He became a director accidentally. While in college, he was out drinking with friends, and the woman next to him at the bar seemed to know a lot about movies. As he was a movie fan, he expounded on his theories, and she became angry, saying that if he knew so much about movies, he could probably direct one. When he agreed, she gave him her card. She was a scriptwriter at Nikkatsu. The next day, he showed up for an interview, but was told he would need a four-year degree to be hired. Relieved, he joined her for tea in the employee cafeteria, where she was sitting with two men who were in desperate need for an assistant director for the film they were starting the next day. She offered Ikeda's services and, since he had no degree, she said he would work free of charge.

Ikeda welcomed the Roman Porno at Nikkatsu, as he had wanted to explore sexy cinema anyway, and the idea of delving into real women, as opposed to romanticized cup dolls, appealed to him. Perhaps this is a good time to mention the origin of Tenshi no harawata, or "Angel Guts." Angel represents the idealized woman, a model of purity and goodness. As I previously mentioned, Japanese believe the guts are the seat of all feelings and motivations. Thus the title infers the conflict between modern womens' spotless image, and the realities of their lives and thoughts. It is also worth mentioning that, although the Japanese have adapted the word porno into their language, it doesn't have the same stigma that it does in English.

While Ikeda claims to be a reluctant director who was much happier as an assistant, I think that was partially modesty talking, and partially beer, since he drank constantly through the interview. Of all the Japanese directors interviewed for this excellent set, Toshiharu Ikeda was the most likable. I suppose it is not a surprise that I liked his film very much as well. Surprisingly, Ikeda was not originally slated to direct at all, but was brought in at the 11th hour, as Ishii was finishing the screenplay. It was slated for an already advertised December 25 release, and he had 10 days to film it.

This time, Nami (Jun Izumi) is a junior sales clerk in a posh department store. She is no stranger to physical pleasure, and we seen her tossing off in one creative way or anther as soon as she gets home from work each day. As a favor to a friend, she subs for a photo shoot one night, and that proves to be a serious mistake because the shoot was for a B&D magazine called "Red Porno." This came to the attention of her married boss, who took her to dinner, got her drunk, and took her to a love hotel. When the boss' wife discovers Nami's magazine spread and recognizes her from the store, he turns her in and gets her fired as a slut moonlighting as a porno star. Nami, as is expected in the Angel Guts series, ends up forming a relationship with Muraka.

Muraka is a nerd, given to masturbating in unison with the school girl (Kyoko Ito) across from his apartment. Of course, she is an inspiration. You wouldn't believe what she does with a raw egg, a condom, and three sharp pencils. Also, some pervert is making obscene phone calls and stealing women's underwear. We are to expect, as the neighbors do, that Muraka is the pervert.

Eventually we finally get to the obligatory rape and tragic ending.

This particular one is the sexiest of the five in the series. The masturbation scenes, while soft core, are very hot, and most of the sex is consensual and passionate. In fact, the plot, although coherent, seems more like glue to tie the sex scenes together. It is the shortest of the five, but otherwise offers the same high quality as the others in the series.

This concludes my coverage of the Nikkatsu Angel Guts films, as I already did the final one (Red Vertigo) a few weeks ago. Ishii made another Angel Guts film several years later, but not for the same studio. This is a fascinating series, presented well, with worthwhile special features and good transfers. Since these were all high budget efforts made by film professionals with the resources of Japan's oldest studio behind them, the quality is solid. They were intended to be shocking, and are still shocking today, especially to Western audiences. They were also the cream of the Roman Porno offerings, due to their origin. This particular film is a C+, and the entire 5-film box set is a very high C+. If you have any interest in Roman Porno, Asian cinema, the depiction of rape in Japan the 70s and 80s, or Manga adaptations, this set is a "must own."

IMDb readers say 5.9, again with very few votes.

 

Jun Izumi, as Nami, shows breasts and buns in several sex and several masturbation scenes. You really need to see how she used a furniture leg.
Kyoko Ito, as the schoolgirl, shows breasts during her masturbation scene and during her rape.
 An unknown, as the boss' wife, shows breasts having sex in a bathtub.
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Two gals caught by the paparazzi. 

Michelle Trachtenberg looks great in black, better in white.


And Kate Bosworth dresses for success.


 

 

 

 

 

 

First there was "Busty Cops."  Now there's "Busty Cops 2." 

And coming soon..."Alabama Jones and the Busty Crusade." 

This is a project which will stretch over several days. Today's babe is Aimee Sweet

First Aimee Sweet with Shawnie ...

... and then Aimee Sweet with Monique Alexander.

 

 

 

 



 

Alexandra Maria Lara

Vom suchen und finden der liebe

 
Catherine Flemming

Die Datsche

 
Emmanuelle Beart

Nathalie

 
Ingrid van Bergen

 Rosen fuer den Staatsanwalt

 
Jessica Stockmann

Exclusiv Weekend

 
Kader Loth

Blitz

 
Silvia Janissc

Fabian

 
Christel Braak

Fabian

 

 

 

 

 

Dann reports on Shapeshifter:

Decent storyline, pretty good acting, but a pretty lame beast, highlight this 2005 horror flick.

A prison is invaded by a shapeshifter, a beast that can change from human to demonic form at will. In beast form, he feeds on his victims. He's sent by the Russian Mafia to get a prisoner who is on the run from the mob.

There's lots of bloody killing, and some pretty interesting antics by the prisoners and guards trying to escape the beast. It's gory, but the story isn't bad. The beast is, unfortunately.

In the scene shown in the collage, Natalia Bellami plays a prostitute who is engaging in some S&M with her client when the beast, who has been let loose to feed, breaks in and......starts feeding. Fans of bloody horror flicks will probably like this one

Natalia Bellami

 

 

 

 

Lindsay Sloan, Entourage , Season Three, Episode 10

Farrah Fawcett- topless in Myra Breckenridge, special edition.

the only other Farrah Fawcett nipple-action from Myra is this scene.

While we're on the subject of the cast of Myra Breckenridge, here's Raquel Welch showing her bum in Hannie Caulder

Nicole Richie REALLY needs to eat a sammich from a paper bag. Then she should place the bag over her head.

 

 


Pat's comments in yellow...


Zookeepers in The Hague, Netherlands, are setting up an online dating service for orangutans.  Lonely apes at Dutch and Indonesian zoos can now see each online.  If they find another ape they like, the two can press a button to give each other food pellets.  A zookeeper said the zoos are so far apart, she doubts the apes will ever actually get together, but she won't rule it out.

*  If you think hooking up with a hairy ape on an Internet dating service
is new, then you've never used one before.




German sex researcher Dr. Werner Habermehl claims to have proved that redheads have more sex.  He compared the sex lives of 600 German women with their hair color and found that redheads clearly had more sex than women of other hair colors.  He also claims that women who dye their hair red are signaling that they are unhappy and looking for a new partner. 

*  Turns out blondes have more fun because they have LESS sex with German men. 

*  This doesn't work for men, or else Carrot Top would get more tail than
George Clooney.



David Copperfield claims he's discovered the Fountain of Youth, and it just happens to be on some islands in the Bahamas that he recently bought and turned into a posh island resort for the ultra-rich that costs $392,000 a week.  Copperfield claims that the youth water is a "true phenomenon," that nearly-dead bugs and leaves that come in contact with it suddenly revive, and he plans to hire scientists to authenticate it.  But a spokesman for the Fountain of Youth Institute, a spa and plastic surgery clinic in Tampa, told E! Online, "Obviously, he's an illusionist, and we deal in reality."

*  Apparently, David's new illusion is to make every rich fool's money
disappear.