Playing with Fire (2000 TV movie) is a Black Television Network film, one of man I have screened. These have an all black cast, usually with some fine looking women and some sex scenes, but are carefully shot to avoid any real exposure. The stories are about TV daytime movie quality, and the acting is generally not Oscar caliber. This time, they missed Vanessa Williams' nipple with the arm/elbow/crossfade tricks. Williams is an executive in some sort of investment firm. She has entrusted little sister Tangi Miller with $50K, couriering it to Ghana. She returns from Ghana with a stolen priceless statue, and didn't deliver the money. She, and her boyfriend who works in the Ghana embassy are to sell it to a middleman. A customs inspector is hot on her trail, and the head of consulate security is also investigating.

Things turn nasty, except for Williams and the consulate head of security, who find true love. IMDB readers have this at 9.4 of 10, with three 10s, a 9, and an 8. That accounts for the four credited cast members and the director. There is nothing especially wrong with this film, but there is nothing right about it either. It is a very slow weak thriller that happens to have an all black cast. Nothing about the story in itself required any ethnicity, but it must be nice for blacks to see films with blacks for a change. It did keep me awake, which is a plus. This is in the C to C- range. An adequate genre effort.

Mo' Better Blues (1990):

I guess it is fair to say that Spike Lee is not just a black man who makes films, but is truly a "black filmmaker", in that his films specifically treat certain aspects of the black experience in America. The reason I make that distinction is that Lee has obviously given a lot of thought, perhaps even obsessed over, issues that the rest of us have never thought about, even if we are white filmmakers or other black men who make films.

Imagine the possibilities, if you will, inherent in a very dark-skinned man in a completely dark room wearing a white suit and a white hat. Bathe him in colored track lighting, and you can create the illusion of a green hat and suit walking around, like the invisible man. Now imagine a dark-skinned black woman and a light-skinned white woman standing side by side in a room. It is nighttime, so there is no sunlight to consider. Bathe the room in beautiful blue lights. The white woman still looks the same, except maybe that she might have eaten some clams during the Red Tide. The black woman's skin, however, now takes on a beautiful blue hue. She's a blue woman. You probably never thought about those things, and neither had I, but Spike has, and used them to create a dazzling array of ultra-cool effects. Imagine Denzel Washington with a polished trumpet and Wesley Snipes with a glistening sax. Add the right kind of cool shades. Dress them in the right colors. Put them in a dark, smoky nightclub with a dark backdrop. Put some shiny surfaces and small lights behind them. Bathe the room in blue light. It's magic. Now use some indirect lighting to light the backdrop in blue as well. Now change the indirect lighting and color the backdrop rose. And so forth.

What you have is a visual poem about the powers of light and darkness and their ability to create and transform moods. You have a jazz riff played out with a camera instead of a saxophone.

This film is among the most artistic and aesthetically brilliant I've ever seen. In addition, Lee and DP Ernest Dickerson use the camera like Michelangelo used a chisel, transforming ordinary interiors into magical venues, transforming New York exteriors into a treasury of memories and evocative moments. They always delight and amaze me with the way the use that camera - with their creative choices for the initial set-up of the camera angle in each scene, and then with the movement of the camera through the scene.

And it's difficult to argue with the musical choices. If you like the music of John Coltrane, Miles Davis and Branford Marsalis, you are gonna go nuts over this biography of a trumpeter who plays that kind of music with a quintet in uptown jazz clubs.

If a movie consisted only of camera angles, camera movement, lighting, photographic composition, storyboarding, production design, interior locations, exterior locations, music, mood and atmosphere, this movie could be considered the Citizen Kane of the 90's. If you love New York City, progressive jazz, and dazzling photographic presentation, this is your film, hands down.

Of course, there is more to a movie than that. There is a script. Storylines. Important themes. I'm not too sure those things should be weighted too heavily when evaluating this film, since it is akin to saying that the plot of Hamlet is kinda stupid, which it is, but who cares? But the scropt is the film's Achilles Heel. The great weakness of the film is that Lee's approach is completely conventional. I didn't see anything new here that I haven't seen in earlier movies like Young Man With a Horn, except that the experiences are specifically filtered through the urban middle-class black experience.

In the opening scene, a young boy wants to play baseball but his mom makes him play the trumpet. He tells mom that he hates the trumpet. We see him next as an adult, and it is then obvious that he loves the trumpet, and values his music above his need for romantic love, over his need to fire his incompetent manager (played by Lee himself), and over his relationships with the members of his ensemble. We see that he's a good man. His incompetent manager has been his best friend since third grade, and he takes care of his friend. But as good as his intentions might be, his obsession with music and his loyalty to his friend are gradually isolating him from everyone else, and chopping off the legs of his existence.

This is not an "important" film like the ones that made Spike Lee famous. It doesn't hammer away on social themes; there's no activism; there's no politics; there's no social injustice. There aren't any white villains. There aren't any white heroes, either. It is simply a story about a man and his surroundings. It must generally reflect portions of the middle class black experience, and it must specifically reflect some of Lee's own loves and hates, but there's no attempt to change the world, or even to remind the world that it needs changing. It's just a story about people who love jazz and New York City, told by a filmmaker who loves jazz and New York City and making movies.

This movie received no Oscar nominations of any kind - not for the astounding lighting effects, the creative cinematography, the art design, or the A+ musical score. None. OK, I can see why it wouldn't be nominated as best picture. There's nothing so impressive about the script, and Spike Lee the actor is many levels lower than Spike Lee the director. But there's a lot of aesthetic achievement in this movie that should have been awarded, or at least nominated.

Given the facts I am a New Yorker, I like Miles and Coltrane, and I really admire dazzling filmmaking ... well, I pretty much loved it. Based upon those variables, your mileage may vary.

This is a C+ on our rating system.  Although it is brilliant in so many ways, I said C+ because the story is trite, and because the film isn't completely broad in its appeal. It doesn't matter whether you are black or white or any other color, but it will be very slow if you don't like the music of Coltrane and Marsalis, because the musical numbers are often played at full length. If you do like those guys, it is heaven.

• Cynda Williams. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) She did her own singing in this film, her screen debut, and she's good, but I don't think her career turned out as she expected. Hollywood wanted her breasts more than her voice, and she ended up whipping out those jumbo jacks in at least seven different movies (see the Encyclopedia entry). Darn the luck, the widescreen DVD in Mo' Better Blues lost the best look at her breasts from the full screen VHS.  (Shown here.)

• Joie Lee (Spike's sister. She looks too much like Spike for my taste.)

OTHER CRAP:

• Inga Drozdova - Playmate of November, 1997 - free nude gallery courtesy of PlayboyPlus.com!
• Yacht runs aground - conveniently next to a topless woman, making for a good wire service photo
• Maiah's September Maxim appearance (the small ones are thumbnails)
• If you're into Mariah, here are all her paparazzi snaps at Mariah Daily
• video of The Cheeky Girls doing The Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum)
• Kate Moss pole dancing - the pole is the one on the left
• The movie industry says that hand-held text-message devices are creating the era of the failed blockbuster. No, it couldn't be that the movie industry is churning out crap. Of course, those instant messages would HELP the film if the audiences liked it.
• Is there a Madden curse? The cover box of the annual electronic football game seems to result in disaster.
• Prince William, in Africa, sees a 14 inch dik-dik, mistakes it for an animal.
• Star Wars: New Episode III Spoilers: "Jar-Jar Binks does not die."
• Here is the trailer for Return of the King
• The Music Cops' Pick Of The Pops -- the most dangerous songs/artists to download
• Kisses - the sexy urinal
• Broadway stages 'Big River,' its first deaf musical. The deaf audience gives Bill Shatner his first-ever standing ovation. Yoko Ono and Cher also have big solos.
• Weekly World News - women's hot flashes are the cause of global warming
• the world's largest-ever grizzly bear
• Gallagher's Top 10 campaign slogans
• The Juggies don't like the new hosts of The Man Show.
• At the DVD polls, Arnold is the candidate to watch. Rentals of Arnold's films have increased by 20% since he announced for governor. Even if he loses, he wins.

Other crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above, since it's sorta in real time.

PIRATE COUNTDOWN:

MOVIE REVIEWS:

Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

• The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
• If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
• A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
• If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

• Stacy Haiduk, showing off her wonderful breasts in scenes from "The Beneficiary" (1997).

• Corey Chang, robo-hooters and very nice rear nudity in more scenes from "The Beneficiary".

• Robin Wright, the "Forrest Gump" star topless in scenes from "Moll Flanders" (1996).

Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website. www.graphic-barry.com.

"8 1/2 Women"

After the death of their Wife/Mother, a father and son open up a brothel inhabited by 8 1/2 women. They are inspired by the Fellini movie "8 1/2".

I confess I simply don't get most British comedies. I didn't get this one. It's way too slow-paced and subtle for my taste. On the plus side, there's plenty of nudity from the women, and some really weird characters they are, too. Some will love this movie, while others simply won't.

• Assorted nude women including: Toni Collette, Vivian Wu and Amanda Plummer.

We of course know her best from "Dude, Where's My Car?". Of course she's also co-starred in the TV series "The Practice" and the teen films "Sugar & Spice" and "Whatever It Takes".

AL-QAIDA CLAIMS CREDIT FOR BLACKOUT
They Must Think We're Dimbulbs - An Arab paper printed a letter supposedly from al-Qaida, claiming they caused the blackout by hitting two power plants in the US and Canada, "its ally in the war against Islam." They claim they brought "dread to Americans' hearts," brought down the Internet, and struck a blow against the stock exchange. Actually, New Yorkers peacefully walked home, the Internet never went down, and the blackout hit after the NYSE closed. It was over by Monday, and the Dow hit a 14-month high.