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Tuna
"Poison" (2000)

Poison (2000) is a direct to VID that IMDB has decided to call "Thy Neighbors Wife." I think the way this happens is that someone hears a working title for a film, and rushes to IMDB to enter the data for the thrill of being first. The film is later made with a real title, but IMDB never changes the listing once it is there. At any rate, it is a damned good soft core. Like many soft core films, it is a thriller, but it is actually not a bad thriller in this case.

As the film opens, Kari Wuhrer sleeps with a prospective client so her husband can sign a development deal. They both expect that he will make VP over the contract, but he is fired, and replaced by Barbara Crampton. Distraught, the husband commits suicide. First, she gets the owner and his family with the old turn on the gas and break a light bulb trick (when they turn on the light, the exposed filament ignites the gas), then goes after Crampton, her husband, the 18 year old daughter (Melissa Stone) and the 20 year old son. We have breast and bun exposure from Wuhrer, Crampton, Stone and Peggy Trentini as a housekeeper.

There is plenty of exposure and simulated sex, but not of the boring variety. The story holds together for the most part, and the acting is superb for this genre. If you see it, be sure to read the single commentary at IMDB, it is a real hoot. I am very pleased to see this trend towards soft core with a good story. C+

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  • Barbara Crampton (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
  • Kari Wuhrer (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
  • Melissa Stone (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
  • Peggy Trentini (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
    I have mixed feelings about today's column. On the one hand, the quality of the images is very weak. They are scans of printed material rather than vidcaps from DVD's. On the other hand, they comprise a body of material which has been seldom if ever seen, and which includes a couple of women that I really wanted to see more of. So, sorry about the quality, but I figured bad images are better than none. Besides, now some of our contributors know where to look for some goodies, which means that revealing them now may stimulate better versions in the future.

    Schmutzfink
    Irene Kugler Dark, but the toplessness is still there. Scenes from "Barracuda Dancing" (1999).

    Anja Nejarri A little known German actress, but great breast exposure in scenes from "SK Kölsch".

    Katrin Weisser Breast exposure, plus a see-thru body stocking in scenes from "Der Mörder in dir".

    Variety
    Josie Maran
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    Excellent B&W pics of the sexy supermodel fully nude. All feature breast exposure, and #2 and #3 have they added bonus of pubes

    Claudia Schiffer
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)


    Christy Turlington
    (1, 2, 3)

    As always, Blackshine delivers some awesome scans of beautiful supermodels. The only nudity can be seen in Christy link #3 (both breasts are visible). Great additions to any collection.

    Kirsten Dunst

    Jennifer Gareis

    From Dann, great collages from a stinker of a movie..."Luckytown" (2000). In case you haven't seen it, Scoop and Tuna have both covered this one. Click here for their reviews.

    The goods...Kirsten plays a non-nude stripper so nothing to see there. Jennifer however shows off her ample bosom as well as some spectacular thong views.

    Natasha Alam I think she is new to me, and I for one am darn glad to meet her. Not nude, but very sexy (open shirt with some partial breast exposure). Scan by Czechmate.

    Katie Price
    (1, 2)

    aka Jordan. The UK pinup babe wearing practically nothing. #1 has some mega-cleavage.

    Nikki Cox Wow! Nikki showing some serious cleavage on the cover of FHM.

    The Funnies by Number 6
  • CARDS YOU'LL NEVER SEE IN HALLMARK

    Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but wonder:.............
    What was I thinking?

    Congratulations on your wedding day!.............
    Too bad no one likes your wife.

    How could two people as beautiful you............
    have such an ugly baby?

    I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love.........
    After having met you, I've changed my mind.

    I must admit, you brought Religion in my life...........
    I never believed in Hell until I met you.

    As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am.......
    that you're not here to ruin it for me.

    As you grow older, Mum, I think of all the gifts you've given me.
    Like the need for therapy...

    Thanks for being a part of my life!!!..........
    I never knew what evil was before this!

    Before you go,......... I would like you to take this knife out of my back.
    You'll probably need it again.

    Someday I hope to get married............
    but not to you.

    You look great for your age.......
    Almost Lifelike!

    When we were together, you always said you'd die for me.........
    Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise.

    I knew the day would come when you would leave me for my best friend.......
    So here's his leash, water bowl and chew toys.

    We have been friends for a very long time...........
    What do you say we call it quits?

    I'm so miserable without you..................
    It's almost like you're here.

    Congratulations on your new bundle of joy...............
    Did you ever find out who the father was?

    You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket....
    I'd miss you heaps and think of you often.

    Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday---------
    So we're having you put to sleep.


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