Updates:

There has been a MAJOR upgrade of the Julie Gayet page in the Encyclopedia. She is one of France's greatest stars, and the page really needed work.

OTHER CRAP:

Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.

Kate Winterich

 

A mute woman (Holly Hunter) lives in Scotland with her father and her illegitimate daughter. She only "speaks" in sign language through her daughter (Anna Paquin), or by playing the piano. Daddy manages to marry her off, sight unseen, to a man now living in New Zealand. When she arrives on the Kiwi coast with her belongings, including her piano, her intended (Sam Neill) makes her leave her piano on the beach. If you are guessing that this made for a rather chilly honeymoon, you are way ahead of me.

When hubby takes off on a small trip, she strikes up a platonic relationship with a European neighbor who has embraced the Maori and gone native (Harvey Keitel). The neighbor hears her play, senses what she wants and needs, and hatches a plan to seduce her. He trades 80 acres of land to her husband for the piano, but demands that she be his teacher. It is then that she figures out that she can win back her piano by getting increasingly friendly with the neighbor. When her uptight husband discovers this hanky-panky, things get out of hand, although the film does manage an upbeat ending.

For those who enjoy symbolism, The Piano is dripping with it, to the extent that director Jane Campion even won the Golden Palm at Cannes, where symbolism can actually be exchanged for Francs at a very favorable rate. It wasn't just the French who loved it. Nearly every critic found it to be one of the top films of the year, and virtually every element of the film won awards: writing, direction, acting, and even the technical aspects. The film earned more prestigious honors than I have the time or energy to list, highlighted by Oscar nominations for Best Picture and Best Director. It might have won in many years, but lost out to the Schindler's List juggernaut, thus showing that 1993 was obviously the year for long meaningful films. A young Anna Paquin received numerous best supporting actress nods, and Holly Hunter was everyone's pick as best actress, winning the Oscar by keeping her mouth completely shut and her clothes off. I mention this in the hope that many other actresses will read this and try the same tactic.

It would be easy for me to write a review oozing with enthusiasm for this highly acclaimed film, but it would be enthusiasm I don't feel. The pace is extremely deliberate, and much of the film is a piano concert, evidently featuring music actually played by Hunter. Hunter's performance may have truly been brilliant, but I was not entertained or enchanted by this mute character who rarely showed any expression on her face. Paquin did an impressive job with a huge role, but I got very tired of her shrieking, and I never did see what about Sam Neill finally won her over. It don't dislike the film, but I must wonder if everyone who praised this film so enthusiastically 13 years ago would feel as strongly about it today. IMDb readers now score it a good-not-great 7.3.

Made for only $7 million, The Piano grossed $40 million domestically, despite being in only 671 theaters. That's more per screen than some $200 million blockbusters! Given the awards and the fact that the film earned a phenomenally large amount for money for an art film, The Piano is clearly a B by our definition.

It was released on DVD before I started reviewing movies, and the primitive DVD includes a letterbox widescreen transfer and a full screen version, but absolutely no meaningful extra features. The film would greatly benefit from a new transfer and a commentary. I might even watch that.

 

Holly Hunter shows breasts and buns in two scenes with Harvey Keitel.

Scoop's notes from October, 1999:

If your taste runs to action movies, this is not your cup of tea, but if you appreciate some thoughtful filmmaking, you might enjoy this story about a Scottish woman who goes across the world to an arranged marriage with a stranger who lives in in a bleak part of New Zealand. Her new husband  (Sam Neill) is so insensitive that he will not help her transport to his home the piano she managed to drag from Scotland to the nearby beach in New Zealand. A roughneck neighbor, who has virtually gone native Maori (Harvey Keitel), trades the husband some land for the piano, and then allows the wife to buy it back key by key with sexual favors. Despite his use of sexual blackmail and his savage appearance, the neighbor turns out to be far more tender and complex than the man she came to marry.

Jane Campion is the only female director ever to win the Golden Palm at Cannes, and was only the second woman ever to be nominated for the Best Director Oscar. Lina Wertmueller was the first, and Sofia Coppola has since become the third, but none of them won the award. Campion did win the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay.

A background of still nature and piano music, splendid acting, and some artistic photographic composition of the coasts and rain forests, make this film a masterpiece in many ways, but the Golden Palm awarded to The Piano at Cannes probably tells you all you need to know about what type of film it is.

 

Rachel Bella in Jimmy and Judy (several small .wmvs zipped together). Variety described this as Natural Born Killers meets Blair Witch Project, and went on to point out, "Seventeen-ish Judy and twentysomething Jimmy (a waist-expanded Edward Furlong who now definitely looks his 30 years) just want to fuck, get fucked up and say 'fuck' a lot. Yet the movie actually seems to view these rebels-without-a-clue as bold nonconformists."

Carrie-Anne Moss sunbathing. Not sure where these came from or when they were taken, but I hope we see more pics and/or better quality.

A larger version of that Barbra Streisand pic. Makes you understand Greek tragedy a lot better, because you can feel the kind of situation that might have made Oedipus gouge his eyes out.

Rebecca Romijn in X-Men 3