 |
Weekend
|
Eye
of the Tiger
|
Hi
Uncle, it's the Turtle again. How are you
doing ? It's been probably several months
since the last time I sent something in.
You probably have way too many
contributions to remember every one of
the persons, but my first submissions go
as far as almost 3 years ago, first
unsigned and later with the little turtle
icon on them. I have accumulated some
material in my desk at the end of the
summer, and finally got off my butt and
rounded up a few minutes to clean it up.
Here we go:
|
CELEBRITIES
FROM SPAIN. This is Bibi Anderson at the
beach. Paparazzi topless shots. Man, can
you believe she is in her 50's AND she
used to be a man ? I remember when she
just had the sex change operation some 15
years ago and some pictures were
published in the Spanish weekly magazine
Interviu (great source for pics)
|
Bibi.
|
This is Ines
Sastre. Nipple see-through. Rare pic.
|
Inma del
Moral. One of the freshest faces on
Spanish TV.
|
Some rare
see-through shots and a bikini shot of
Judit Masco.
|
Judit Masco .
|
Judit Masco .
|
Brand new
topless shots of Yvonne Reyes. Taken just
a few days ago. She looks as good as
usual.
|
Arianne
Brown. She is Bertin Osborne's
ex-girlfriend. He is a very popular TV
show host in Spain. The shots were
supposedly taken by paparazzi in some
Miami beach. She is hot.
|
Arianne Brown
.
|
Arianne Brown
.
|
Arianne Brown
.
|
Arianne Brown
.
|
Cristina
Tarrega. TV show host for Antena 3
Television in Spain.
|
Tarrega .
|
Marta Botia.
She is a singer for the pop group
"Ella Baila Sola" which
translates as "She dances
alone". She's got some goods! Again
summer paparazzi shots at the beach.
|
Botia .
|
Botia .
|
NAOMI. Here
is some of the vintage material I
promised. I've seen some of these shots
on the funhouse before, but I don't think
it's ever been covered so extensively.
The pictures belong to the summer of
1993. At the time, Naomi Campbell was
spending a few days with some friends at
the house Bono (U2) has in the exclusive
Montecarlo. There is where the shots were
captured by a lucky reporter. The
pictures leave nothing to the
imagination... This is my favorite. I
spent quite some Photoshop time to make
it look good.
|
Naomi.
|
Naomi.
|
Naomi.
|
Naomi.
|
Naomi.
|
Naomi.
|
Naomi.
|
Naomi.
(Scoop's note: don't miss this one)
|
Naomi.
|
Naomi.
|
There is no
dedicated Turtle site, but whatever he
has sent in is archived in the back
issues. Search for "Turtle"
with the search function in the back
issues. We have more than a year of back
issues, plus the rasslin' babes site, the
fakes, the Fun House, the Encyclopedia,
and the Mardi Gras pics. Click here to
sign up, log in, or get info
|
Something
to Crow About |
Crow did four
collages from "Coach's
Daughter". This is Kelly Van Dyke,
daughter of Jerry from coach, and niece
of Dick. This is a general collage, the
other three are xxx-rated activity
|
Kelly Van
Dyke.
|
Kelly Van
Dyke.
|
Kelly Van
Dyke.
|
Blinky,
the three-eyed fish |
Blinky goes
through the fashion sites for us, in
search of exposure. Audrey Marnay .
|
Claudia
Schiffer .
|
Erika
Stromqvist .
|
various
unidentified .
|
various
unidentified .
|
various
unidentified .
|
various
unidentified .
|
There is no
dedicated Blinky site, and he's quite new
here as well, although he posts here
exclusively. We do have more than a year
of back issues, plus the rasslin' babes
site, the fakes, the Fun House, the
Encyclopedia, and the Mardi Gras pics.
Click here to sign up, log in, or get
info
|
FenderBender |
I think
Fender-Bender is new. He scanned four
classic Helmut Newton photos, the names
of which are on the scans. Here's Jodie
Foster
|
"Giant
and nude" .
|
"Pere
Lachaise" .
|
"In a
Photomaton booth" .
|
RDO
(corrections) |
RJL wrote in
to say that some of the pictures from The
Man Who fell to Earth were reversed.
According to him, he knows Adrienne
laRussa personally, and this isn't
Adrienne. Therefore, it must be Linda
Hutton. (Nothing special to look at. It's
from the three women who had the three
identical sex scenes with Rip Torn)
|
Linda Hutton
.
|
Linda Hutton
.
|
And this is
the woman that RJL says is really
Adrienne Larussa.
|
Adrienne
Larussa.
|
There is no
dedicated RDO, but he's here every
weekend for years, and they are all
archived in the back issues. Search for
"RDO" with the search function
in the back issues, or just mosey through
teh Monday editions. We have more than a
year of back issues, plus the rasslin'
babes site, the fakes, the Fun House, the
Encyclopedia, and the Mardi Gras pics.
Click here to sign up, log in, or get
info
|
Tuna
does Femalien (continued) |
Stacy Mobley.
|
Stevie Conrad
.
|
Summer Leigh
.
|
Sarah StJames
and Vanesa Taylor.
|
FR |
Another great
collection of new FR material. This is
Lara Flynn Boyle is a quite explicit sex
scene from "Susan's Plan"
|
Sandrine Holt
in an episode of "The Outer
Limits".
|
This is Adjoa
Andoh in "Close Relations".
This one is odd, even by my liberal
standards.
|
Mongoose |
Mr. Goose
continues with his series of Jennifer
Burton in "Play Time".
|
Jennifer
Burton in "Play Time" .
|
Jennifer
Burton in "Play Time" .
|
Jennifer
Burton in "Play Time" .
|
Snowblind |
Laura
Pursell. "The Landlady".
|
Susie Singer.
"The Landlady".
|
Nikki Fritz.
"Fugitive Rage".
|
Wendy
Schumacher. "Fugitive Rage".
|
Wendy
Schumacher. "Fugitive Rage".
|
Wendy
Schumacher. "Fugitive Rage".
|
More |
Mitzi Martin
in a true cinema classic, Harley Davidson
and the Marlboro Man.
|
Jennifer Grey
in Lover's Knot .
|
Someone did a
collage of Saira Todd in "Holding
On", from Pitters' caps.
|
Slarti's
captures of Eva Hassman in "The Cold
Finger"
|
Sunday's
mail
|
"Re
hat tricks: the French is "tour du
chapeau" which in a direct
translation would mean "around the
hat"."
|
"Hey
Scoop- First off - thanks for the page. I
appreciate all of the hard work that you
put in to the page. As far as hat tricks
go, a hat trick is a hat trick
everywhere. I may be wrong, but I think
that phrase actually started in Chicago.
In any event, it originated back during
the six team NHL days. Oddly enough, one
thing I have learned since moving to New
Zealand is that 'hat trick" has come
to mean three of pretty much anything in
a sport. In rugby, the refer to three
tries in a game as a hat trick. A pair is
a brace. And a hat trick isn't any
special thing - even though it is pretty
damned rare. In cricket, a hat trick is a
bowler taking three wickets on three
consecutive deliveries. Since there are
many days in test cricket where they take
maybe 5 wickets over the course of 8
hours of play, and about 540 deliveries,
this is obviously quite an
accomplishment. A newspaper here recently
traced the history of the phrase's usage
back to England about 25 years ago -
which suggests quite strongly to me that
they actually stole it from hockey.
|
"Hello
Scoop! I am told that Kristin Davis did a
see-thru bra scene on the 09-21-99
episode of "Sex and the City".
Being out on unexpected business, I
missed it. I am convinced that her only
other topless picture (last year) is a
body double. (Her boobs just ain't that
big!) I would have thought that one of
your faithful booty hunters...errr...I
mean "bounty hunters" would
have grabbed those frames by now.
|
"I'd
like to suggest to the vidcappers Hot
Body's "Miss Puerto Vallarta".
Tiffany Anne, the winner, is about as
good as a woman can get.
|
Sunday's
Chat
|
I saw American Beauty today.
A few observations. Many people have
described it as Kevin Spacey going
through a mid-life crisis. It isn't
precisely right. He has a mid-life
epiphany. He realizes that his life is
unexamined and he's allowed it to be so.
He begins to examine it, and finds that
he is surrounded by loss. His wife is a
horror, a shallow and energetic career
woman whose desire for perfection has
left all semblance of real human feelings
in the murky past. She's like a cokehead,
devoid of any examination or awareness of
the valuable things on life, driven only
by the coke or, in her case, perhaps her
adrenalin addiction. What is she hiding
from? Where, thinks Spacey, is the woman
he loved - the woman who used to go up on
the roof to flash the traffic helicopter?
He knows that this monster he lives with
must have that woman inside of her, but
he can't find her. He's lost his
daughter, too, although the script makes
this difficult to understand, because
they are a lot alike but can't seem to
make contact. Spacey misses that contact,
which he knows he once had. His job
-well, 14 years as an advertising whore,
and they want him to write a job
justification memo, which he can't bring
himself to do. How, he thinks, did it get
so messed up, and how can he fix it? His
retaliation against life brings some real
identification from the audience members,
who laugh, sit stunned, cheer, and
consistently get involved with his
crisis. I can't remember a movie with so
many instances of audience members
talking to the screen. By the way, it's
no comedy. It's funny enough, but it is a
movie about loss, dysfunction, and the
breakdown of communication. If you
watched it a second time, knowing the
punch lines and therefore impervious to
them, I think you'd realize the intense
sadness at the center.
The movie isn't perfect. Some
of the main characters are pure
cardboard: the stereotyped and
unbelievable Marine colonel next door on
one side, the two considerate gay guys on
the other side, and even Annette Bening's
character - cartoons more suitable in a
farce than in a witty drama. But all that
doesn't matter, because the heart of the
movie beats solid. The narrative flows
with an added metaphorical punctuation,
represented in Spacey's fantasies and the
home movies of the sensitive boy next
door. Rarely does a film rise to these
poetic heights. Spacey, his daughter, the
daughter's sexy friend, and the
daughter's drug dealing boyfriend, form
the real core of the movie, and they
couldn't be much better.
Kevin Spacey is an unusual
actor. I don't see him as journeying to
every corner of the acting universe like
Branagh or Streep, or Kevin Kline, but
what he brings to the screen is a perfect
everyman quality. The fact that he
doesn't have a traditional actor's voice
and range is a plus, not a minus. It
accentuates his skill at portraying
everyman. We can see and understand a
real person at the center of every role
he plays, no matter how far that man
might be from our own behavior. Isn't
SE7EN a perfect example? How much more
did you relate to mass-murdering Spacey
than Brad Pitt, the good cop. In
addition, Spacey is the most economical
actor I've ever seen. With nothing more
than sudden smiles and the look in his
eyes, he can manipulate your emotions as
precisely as a violinist. Employing him
is like adding an extra counterpoint to
the musical score, because he can raise
and lower the emotional temperature of
the audience in the same way the music
would do it. Can you tell I'm a fan? The
guy is great. He erases all the
technique, opens himself up and invites
you into his part. "This isn't me in
this role, it's both of us". It
doesn't even matter that there are some
flaws in this film. Spacey, with the aid
of some of the other players, simply
diverts your attention from everything
else like a master illusionist. It's
difficult for me to remember a better
performance since Brando was a real
actor. And the kid who plays the drug
dealer just about goes toe-to-toe with
Spacey
On the celebrity nudity side,
Mena Suvari and Thora Birch both show off
their chests, both worth seeing, both in
a sensitive and beautiful context, and
I'll bet we'll have some bootlegs soon.
On the other hand, forget that. Sometimes
you come to a site like mine because you
don't want to watch an entire dumb-ass
movie to see that minute of nudity. In
this case, don't wait for the captures.
Go to the theater and see the movie. I
don't think anyone in the audience
regretted being there.
|
Movies
from Aesthete |
Kari Wuhrer.
Sometimes life is like a beer commercial.
You got Sunday, you got Aesthete, you hot
Kari Wuhrer in "Sex and the Other
Man". Absent a BJ, how much better
could life be?
|
Kari Wuhrer.
Jumbo breast close-up.
|
Kari Wuhrer
|
Kari Wuhrer
|
Kari Wuhrer
|
Kari Wuhrer
|
Kari Wuhrer
|
Kari Wuhrer
|
Kari Wuhrer
|
Stone
Cold
|
The last time
I printed Stone Cold's letter, I got
about 100 e-mails telling me to print his
comments even if he doesn't send in
pictures. Maybe next time. I can't print
them this time. I laughed my ass off, but
they are written in a fabricated dialect
and a character voice, and I think they
are too controversial even by my
standards, since he walks the line
between satire and outright lunacy, and
many people would take it wrong. Stoney
started sending these letters to Realist,
who is a bit of a techno-geek. Realist
invented an e-mail filter which is quite
cool. If some kid or loony sends a
mindless flame, Realist would send them
back an innocuous e-mail with a harmless
cookie hidden inside. The next time that
guy sent us a mail from the same
computer, no matter what phony e-mail
address he used, the e-mail would include
in the subject line "I'm a flame
geek", and would be immediately sent
to the deleted items folder. Realist
thought Stoney was one of these loonies,
so he sent him back the cookie. When
Stoney tried to send in picture
attachments, we'd never see them! Realist
did such a good job that Stoner had to
change his default e-mail program. The
Stone Man did have a funny comment about
VanDamme in these pictures from
"Universal Soldier 2". He said
the black community has decided to make
VanDamme an honorary member because it's
obvious that his native language must be
Ebonics. The actual picture is a nice one
of Kiana Tom in a top which shows off
some of her assets, although she keeps
her clothes on.
|
This is Kelly
Williams in a teaser for "Phoenix
Point"
|
This is a
very pretty cleavage shot of Lucy Lawless
|
This is
Sheeri "I Am" Rappaport,
another member of the Xena cast (Otere)
|
This is Shana
Betz, who was one of the stars of the
indie, "Lucinda's Spell".
Shana's entry in IMDb looks like it was
written by her agent. The first two
listings and one other, for example, are
TV series in which Shana is the only
listed cast member! The other three
entries are "awaiting five
votes"
|
Words
and music by Tuna |
Scoop:
Femalien can't possibly be porn -- let's
examine the facts carefully. It takes 4
whole words to describe the plot in
detail (Femalien seeks sex -- succeeds).
That is way too much plot for a porno. It
is found in nearly every video store,
usually under cult classics, even the
ones like Blockbuster that won't carry
porn. There is no music playing at the
threshold of pain during the erotic
scenes. Therefore this must be a
legitimate mainstream film that just
accidently has nipples visible in nearly
every frame of the movie. Said nipples
are attached to breasts that appear to be
enhanced for our viewing pleasure. I
showed my usual restraint, and only did
12 collages from the Femalien DVD. The
first 4 are attached:
|
Sara St.
James as the restaurant owner who has sex
with Femalien. Before anyone writes in,
she uses several screen names, including
Jacqueline Lovell and Jackie Lovell
(Scoop's note in passing. I've been
surfing the net for many years, and Sara
St. James was the first woman I can
remember with her own dedicated web site,
possibly excepting Danni Ashe. Despite
her prescience in using the internet as a
publicity machine, she never really did
get very famous.)
|
Skylar
Nicholson as a woman having sex with
another woman during a performance art
show. This is her only film
|
Kathleen
Mazzotta as a woman having sex with her
husband. Sometimes credited as Leena, all
34 of her other films appear to be
hardcore
|
Bobbie Marie
as a woman having sex with another woman
during a performance art show. This was
her debut performance. She has made one
other Surrender Cinema film since.
Surrender Cinema has a brand new Web site
(www.surrendercinema.com) and is offering
all of their films from the site. I was
pleased to see that many of them are
available on DVD, including Femalien II.
|
Pitters |
"Today's
offering is some 'caps of Gillian
Kearney, currently starring on BBC Tv in
a series called 'Sex, Chips &
Rock'n'roll'. She doesn't seem to have
done much before this, although I believe
she played the younger version of Pauline
Collins in the film Shirley
Valentine." (Scoop's note: Pitters
sends in raw caps. So far, every one of
his contributions has been unique. If you
care to edit them and make collages, he
has no objection. Credit him if you care
to be polite. If you aren't an editor,
you don't want to see all 16. Just pick
one in the middle somewhere, because they
are all similar)
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Kearney
|
Pitters' next
group is Saira Todd from "Holding
On". Same general idea, but this
time the captures are smaller, and there
are three different camera angles, so
pick one from each set-up. Sorry, but I
just didn't have time to help with
editing and collaging these, but you guys
feel free. Todd, angle 1
|
Todd, angle 1
|
Todd, angle 1
|
Todd, angle 1
|
Todd, angle 1
|
Todd, angle 2
|
Todd, angle 2
|
Todd, angle 3
|
Todd, angle 3
|
There is no
dedicated Pitters site, but his
contributions are all archived in the
back issues. Search for
"Pitters" with the search
function in the back issues. We have more
than a year of back issues, plus the
rasslin' babes site, the fakes, the Fun
House, the Encyclopedia, and the Mardi
Gras pics. Click here to sign up, log in,
or get info
|
PAL |
PAL just
returned from holiday. Welcome back.
here's Jeanne Moreau in "La
Notte"
|
Marianne
Basler in "Contrainte par
corps"
|
Michele
Mercier in "Shoot the Piano
Player"
|
Mongoose |
MonGoose's
collection today is Jennifer Burton in
"Play Time". Her partner here
is Monique Parent
|
Jennifer
Burton in "Play Time"
|
Jennifer
Burton in "Play Time"
|
Jennifer
Burton in "Play Time"
|
Jennifer
Burton in "Play Time"
|
Spacek-Sarandon
|
Crow-Jewel
|
Spears-Aniston
|
Janet-Hewitt
|
...
more ...
|
Mariah Carey
- paparazzi??? (Bashful Monkey)
|
Mariah Carey
- paparazzi??? This one is absolutely
worth a look. Quite a revealing rear
view. (Bashful Monkey)
|
Susan
Anspach, "Into the Fire" (GR)
|
Nina
Kunzendorf on stage in the Schlachten
festival
|
Regina
Fritsch, on stage, in "Reigen"
|
Markie Post
in a swimsuit on an episode of "Love
Boat" (FR).
|
Movies
from RDO
|
I don't
need to introduce RDO to you unless you
came from that Bowie planet. He is the
Movie Baron, and has been featured in the
weekend page since dirt was young.
Speaking of RDO, I have a question for
you guys. Some weeks ago, I made some
hockey jokes about Jennifer Hetrick, and
RDO (a Canadian) wrote back to say only
the Canadians would get it. Is that true?
What is a three goal game called in the
rest of the world? You guys from
hockey-playing nations - Swedes, Finns,
Czechs, Russians, others, help me out
here. And translate the expression back
into English if you can, assuming it's
not already in English. French Canadians,
do you say "hat trick", or do
you have a unique French expression? Note
to RDO: your file names, for server
purposes, are stripped of commas and
spaces.
|
I've
talked about The Man who Fell to Earth a
lot in the past. I feel like Nic Roeg
really blew it on this one. There are
some elements of imagination, especially
in the silent scenes on Bowie's home
planet, and Roeg was a cinematographer,
so the visuals can be striking.
Unfortunately, he has no concept of
story-telling. The movie is much too
long, it includes many unnecessary scenes
that do nothing for the plot (although
some of them showed us more nekkid
chickadees), there are beginner
continuity errors, and the motivation of
the characters is usually indecipherable,
as if another story were taking place off
camera. Too bad, it was a good story, and
Bowie was quite perceptive in his
portrayal. With another director it could
have been a stunning and possibly very
moving film.
|
Candy Clark
in "The Man Who Fell to Earth".
Bathtub
|
Candy Clark
in "The Man Who Fell to Earth".
Bathtub.
|
Candy Clark
in "The Man Who Fell to Earth".
Bathtub enlargement
|
Candy Clark
in "The Man Who Fell to Earth".
The remainder are the candlelit sex
scene.
|
Candy Clark
in "The Man Who Fell to Earth"
|
Candy Clark
in "The Man Who Fell to Earth"
|
Candy Clark
in "The Man Who Fell to Earth"
|
Candy Clark
in "The Man Who Fell to Earth"
|
These next
three girls appeared in cookie-cutter
identical scenes with Rip Torn. Hilary
Holland in "The Man Who Fell to
Earth"
|
Hilary
Holland in "The Man Who Fell to
Earth"
|
Vive
la France |
You're gonna
hate this if you hate naked French babes,
because that'll be the next ten thousand
links or so. This is Pascale Ogier in
Eric Rohmer's "Full Moon in
Paris", from Jean I. Web
|
Pascale Ogier
in Eric Rohmer's "Full Moon in
Paris.
|
Pascale Ogier
in Eric Rohmer's "Full Moon in
Paris.
|
Pascale Ogier
in Eric Rohmer's "Full Moon in
Paris.
|
As befitting
his official status as the internet's
official celebrity nude research library,
RDO followed up on a couple of the
suggestions from last week. He did
"A La Folie". Here's Beatrice
Dalle.
|
"A La
Folie", Beatrice Dalle.
|
"A La
Folie", Beatrice Dalle.
|
"A La
Folie", Anne Parillaud. Difficult
lighting, but a great scene, and RDO did
a good job under impossibly dark
conditions.
|
New guy chips
in. Here's Catherine DeNeuve in
"Missippi Mermaid", from Hannes
Cap.
|
Catherine
DeNeuve in "Missippi Mermaid
|
Amira Casar
in "Ainsi soient-elles. From RVF.
Find him at #france-celebs on the
undernet.
|
Casar.
|
Casar.
|
Casar.
|
Casar.
|
Florence
Thomassin in "Ainsi
soient-elles". Also from RVF.
|
Thomassin.
|
Thomassin.
|
Thomassin.
|
Thomassin.
|
Thomassin.
|
Sophie
Guillemin in "L'ennui". From
Touch
|
Guillemin.
|
Guillemin.
|
Sophie
Marceau in "Descente aux
enfers". My French spelling isn't
good, but I think that is correct and the
file name has the words misspelled. Very
good caps, very beautiful presentations
from Touch.
|
Marceau.
|
Marceau.
|
Marceau.
|
Marceau.
|
Marceau.
|
Tuna |
Dana Plato in
the Different Strokes Movie.
|
Kari Wuhrer
in "Sex and the Other Man".
|
Landon Hall
in the Different Strokes movie.
|
Mathilda May
in "Becoming Collette".
|
Snap-on,
Snap-off
|
Or maybe
that's "Wax-On, Wax-Off", or
"Clap-on, Clap-off'. I always get
the Snapper, The Clapper, and Pat Morita
confused. Snapper is new to these pages
in the past week, but he has come up with
some kick-ass contributions. Marisa
Berenson
|
Catherine
Bailey.
|
Catherine
Bailey.
|
Jane Birkin.
|
Desire |
I don't know
who Angela Nicholas is, but Desire does,
and she scanned a ton of her doing some
fun stuff!
|
Angela
Nicholas.
|
Angela
Nicholas.
|
Angela
Nicholas.
|
Angela
Nicholas.
|
Angela
Nicholas.
|
Angela
Nicholas.
|
Angela
Nicholas.
|
DiamondEdge |
Diamondedge
presents Theresa Langley in
"DreamMaster".
|
Theresa
Langley in "DreamMaster".
|
Theresa
Langley in "DreamMaster".
|
Patricia
Skerjotis in "DreamMaster".
|
Patricia
Skerjotis in "DreamMaster".
|
Kinda
Mossy
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi. Somebody's omnibus collection.
Various sources, various scanners. Some
good, some bad, some ugly.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
Kate Moss
paparazzi.
|
More,
More, More |
??? Kylie
Minogue paparazzi from Ma-Scan.
|