Loverboy (2005):

Loverboy is Kevin Bacon's second full-length directorial effort, following many years after the other, a 1996 Showtime film called Losing Chase. It is, at least in theory, a drama about a psychotically possessive mother. I added the stipulation because it also includes some moments of bizarre and perhaps inappropriate comedy.

The mother in question is played by Bacon's wife, Kyra Sedgwick, whose own parents were so wound up in one another that they barely noticed her. She resolves to be the opposite kind of parent, and succeeds perfectly. Once she manages to conceive a child, after a circuitous process, she makes the boy her full-time job. (Her parents left her financially independent.) All of this seems beautiful while the child is an infant and the mother is doting and totally attentive, but ominous signs appear whenever the boy starts to develop curiosity about the outside world, because his mother insists on keeping his focus entirely on her. She reacts in increasingly extreme ways whenever she has any type of competition for her son's attention, so that her mental state is gradually revealed to be not attentive, but smothering.

This film really struggles to find an appropriate tone. The mother's own childhood is recalled in flashbacks, and since the past is seen not as objective history but through her own disturbed memories,  her parents (Bacon and Marisa Tomei) are seen as grotesque caricatures of thoughtless, self-absorbed 70s-era hipsters. Bacon does his best impersonation of Dr. Hunter Thompson, as filtered through Eugene Levy's own 1970s character, comedian Bobby Bittman, clad in tacky leisure suits and constantly misfiring rapid-fire remarks which are designed to be funny. There's nothing wrong with the Tomei-Bacon scenes. They are pretty funny when considered on their own. And there's nothing wrong with the fact that the characters are so one-dimensional, because they exist only in the mother's tormented memories. It's just that, well, the zany comedy seems to be in a different movie from the tragic story which unfolds in the present.  The inconsistency of the tone runs through the film's other flashbacks as well. Her attempts at conception, for example, play out as a sex farce.

I think the ending of the film is supposed to be a surprise, but I only know that because some other people have mentioned it. I saw the very first scene and immediately concluded that the mother was committing suicide and taking her son with her. I mean, they are in the car, the kid is behind the wheel, the ignition is clearly on, they've packed enough for a day trip, and the car is in park. What else could it be? Maybe I would have enjoyed the film more if I had been aware that there was supposed to be a secret. I can't say.

While we're on the subject of that ending, the film didn't even have the courage of its convictions. The boy survives the carbon monoxide poisoning. After the suicide has been revealed (along with the similarly grotesque fate of Bacon and Tomei in the flashbacks), it tacks on a strangely sentimental epilogue in which the boy is revealed to have grown to young adulthood, and is remembering his mother's tenderness with sad fondness.  The film got a bit muddled here, perhaps because Bacon made some changes to the original story and those changes required other elements to be reinterpreted. In the book, both the mother and the son survived the suicide. Bacon decided that he wanted the mother to die, but that change required other changes, especially the disastrous epilogue. Is this a film about an eccentric, loving woman who was a bit misguided? It seems to be that at first. Then it seems to be a satire with a pitch-black sense of humor. Then it seems to be a melodrama about a deranged psychopath. Then the epilogue returns it to "lovable but troubled eccentric" mode.

My final problem with the film is its repetitiousness. It makes the point that the mother overreacts to competition for her son's attention. Then it makes the point again, and again, and ...

It played at Sundance in 2005, but distributors knew that the film was totally unmarketable, so it was never in more than ten theaters, and even that perfunctory release occurred more than a year after its festival premiere. Because of the Sundance exposure, it did pick up some reviews, almost universally negative. (18% positive, per RT.) It hasn't generated much support at IMDb, where it is rated a feeble 5.4.

It's not an incompetent movie, but any means. Kevin Bacon has some talent as a director. I really believe that. And he certainly has the ability to attract talented people to his projects. This micro budget film is chock-full of name actors. Don't close your eyes, or you may miss Blair Brown, Oliver Platt and Matt Dillon. Bacon also has the ability to draw on the considerable acting talents of his wife and himself. Given all those elements, I'll bet he has a good movie or two in him, but if he's ever going to make the transition from acting, he needs to acquire some subtlety, and above all he needs a better script.

Kyra Sedgwick

 

Third party videos:

Here is Amy Smart's wild sex scene with Jason Stratham in Crank (Zipped. avi, cap below)

Here is LC's film clip to accompany his captures of Tiffany Shepis in Abominable. (Zipped. avi, cap below)

 

OTHER CRAP:

Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.

Various

September Spanish Movie Recap, Part 2

NEW FILMS:

Caps from Rosario Tijeras (2005) ... (6.6 at IMDb)

* Lina Marcela Parra
 

* Flora Martinez
 

Caps from Lifting de Corazon (2005)  ... (5.8 at IMDb)

* María Barranco

* Mariana-Anghileri

SPANISH ... um ... CLASSICS:

Flauti wrote:

The following films are "classics" from Spain. I'm sure that just about everyone in Spain has seen the farcical comedies starring Andres Pajares, Fernando Esteso, and Antonio Ozores. These movies were in the late 70's and early 80's, after the end of the dictatorship, when Spain started to change and to break free from both government and church censorship. Many films tested the new sexual and satirical boundaries, reflecting the spirit of rebellious freedom which is found wherever people try out wings which have long been clipped. The quality of these movies is very bad (see the IMDb user ratings for some of these!), but they can be very, very funny. They are filled with nude girls, men in their underwear, and wicked lines of dialogue.

Caps from Los Liantes (1981) ... 5.2 at IMDb

* Adriana Vega

* Loli Tovar

* Marcia Bell

Caps from Agitese antes de usarla (1983)  ... a sterling 2.3 at IMDb

* Beatriz Escudero

* Jenny Llada

* Lali Espinet

Caps from Los Chulos (1981) ... another big IMDb winner at 2.1

* Gina Baro

* Jenny Llada

Helene Joy in Desolation Sound

You will be disappointed to hear that Lindsay Lohan does occasionally wear panties.

Elina Madison in Look @ Me

Mary-Louise Parker (or not) in Master Spy