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"Bikini Girls of the Lost Planet"
Bikini Girls of the Lost Planet (2006) is Fred Olin Ray's newest piece of silliness, due for release this coming Tuesday. It is strictly played for laughs, and uses the familiar story of alien lesbians coming to earth to gather sperm to keep their planet of Aquaterra populated. Meanwhile, blonde brainless bimbo Nicole Sheridan is trying to screw her way to passing grades in her college classes. Of course, she meets up with the aliens as a subject matter expert. Meanwhile, the government discovers somehow that they landed on campus. The G man ends up with the 4H teacher, Michelle Lay, and lays her before erasing her memory. The space girls, with the aid of their magic vibrators, get what they came for, including some male specimens to take home to their leader, Rebecca Love. The two space travelers are played by Syren and Christine Nguyen.
Nicole Sheridan and Michelle Lay show everything. Syren, Christine Nguyen and Rebecca Love show breasts and buns.
Since this is direct to vid and not yet on the streets, IMDb is awaiting 5 votes, and there are no reviews available. It was clearly shot on Hi Def, and maximizes screen boob time. The characters are all stereotypes, but then the object of the film is to show tits, which it does, and get a few laughs, intentional or otherwise, along the way. I am not sure anything made me laugh out loud, but I did smile in a couple of places. We will call this a C-, for genre fans and fans of cast members.
"Blackbelt"
Blackbelt (1992) is an exploitation kick-boxing film with a cast full of actual kick-boxing champions. It opens by introducing John Sweet (Matthias Hues) as he kills four men in a room, and then rips hooker Mia Ruiz after making sure she shows her breasts. he then delivers her severed finger to budding rock star Shanna (Deirdre Imershein). Former cop and paid professional good guy Jack Dillon (Don 'The Dragon' Wilson), is brought in as bodyguard to protect her from this deranged killer. Of course one deranged killer wouldn't have made much of a film, so we are shown the subplot of a wise guy manager who intends to get Shanna to renew her contract with him or kill her. And, oh yes, he likes his hit men to use martial arts.
Yes, that's much better. Now we can choreograph as many fight scenes as we want leading to the genre-required final showdown between Jack Dillon and John Sweet. Of course, to be true to the genre, we have to kill the policeman partner and get Shanna in bed with Jack Dillon, which we do. Rather than use actors for bad guys, they hired nothing but kick-boxing champions for the fight scenes, which kept dialogue from getting in the way of brawling.
Mia Ruiz shows breasts, as does Deirdre Imershein.
IMDb readers say 3.7. Clearly, this is a by the numbers exploitation kickboxing film, but is that really a bad thing? It kept me entertained for the full 85 minutes of screen time, it had fights, gun battles, car chases, lots of great death scenes from bad guys, good martial arts choreography, and the film was bookended with breasts. It is a throwback to 70s drive-in fare, and is appropriately distributed by Roger Corman's New Horizons. The genre is kick boxing exploitation, which doesn't have a very high bar to clear to begin with, and this is a first-rate effort. This is a C+ by our scale.
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From RokWatch, here is long time TV and film actress Anne Lockhart (daughter of June Lockhart), going topless in the 1977 movie, "Joyride" (1977)
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One more from From RokWatch...Here is the actress with possibly the longest name in Hollywood, Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio. Here she is showing undies and most of her breasts in a scene from the Brian De Palma classic, "Scarface".
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Here is "Smallville" star Erica Durance teasing us by almost getting her bra off in scenes from the direct-to-dvd flick, "The Butterfly Effect 2". Thanks to Johnny Moronic.
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Señor Skin 'caps of Béatrice Dalle going topless and full frontal in scenes from "La Visione del Sabba".
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