MILF

2010

How much is there to add to the self-reviewing title? You can probably deduce from the title that there was never, at any time, a plan to call this Schindler's List 2. Although now that I think about it, that would make a pretty cool movie - Schindler's List 2: The Wrath of Goeth. If only Ricardo Montalban were still around to play Goeth.

Obviously, MILF is a straight-to-vid youthploitation film cut from the 80s mold of tits and blue jokes and college kids. The bar for these films has been raised quite a bit since the 80s, because just about everything has already been done that can be done in this genre, so it's tough to come up with new gross-outs and original characters. I have to give the film a tip o' the hat for stretching the boundaries a bit. The basic premise of the film is that two best friends, college roommates, end up screwing each other's divorced moms. Everybody feels guilty and each guy tries to hide the affair from the other guy, not knowing that the other guy is doing the same.

That in itself is not so very daring, but there is one place where the script pushes the outside of the envelope. One of the guys comes back unexpectedly early to the dorm room. His mom is inside screwing his roommate. The couple in the room realize what's happening when they hear the lock jiggling, so they hide under a bed. When the roommate enters, he finds that a camera has been running, so he rewinds it and watches his roommate fucking a hot blonde chick. The action is so hot that he starts to tug one off. The camera angle prevents him from seeing that the woman in the video is his mom. Making the matter even more uncomfortable, his mom is under the bed, fully aware that he is jerking off over her, but unable to do anything about it.

When this genre began, perhaps 30-35 years ago, with movies like Animal House and Porky's, there was an effort to present situations one could imagine oneself in. It appears that there are no more such situations available. I have a good enough imagination, but I can't really picture myself jerking off while watching my mom screwing my college roommate, and I really can't imagine my mom being under the bed while I'm doing it. If you've actually been in a situation like that, you're a pretty weird dude.

Oh, well. The fact that one cannot relate to the situations doesn't mean the film isn't fun to watch. To be honest, it's kind of a turn-on. The two moms are hot, and there are various other situations involving attractive chicks. There's lots of nudity, and the film has a pleasant, good-hearted vibe which makes up for its lack of jokes and originality. It's easy enough to watch.

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Nudity:

• Amy Lindsay is the main female star as one of the moms, a character who is quite centered and pleasant. She and the one kid have a real relationship, not just lust, so they have tender, straight sex. She shows her breasts several times, but never shows any more than that.
• Molinee Green is completely nuts as the other mom. She does a sexy full frontal just a few minutes into the film, then is later seen in a crazy sex scene.
• Diana Terranova does yet another crazy sex scene. She's fully naked and covered with chocolate syrup.
• Christina Nguyen - boring scene, straight sex, breasts only.
• unknown - a yoga instructor bares her breasts in a three-way.
• unknown - a young mom bares her enormous breasts in straight missionary position sex.
• unknown - the wife of the physics teacher bares it all briefly, and her breasts at length, in a hot tub scene.
• Jamie Bernadette may or may not have had her breast peeking out of her dress. Oh, the breast was there, but it may have been a body double. Since my best guess was "double," I didn't capture it. There wasn't much to it anyway.
• Various other body parts appeared from various other women, often without visible heads. (There's no shortage of nudity in this film!)