Thursday


Notes
NOTE TO ALL: Scoopy Jr writes the bulk of the commentary these days, while Uncle Scoopy continues to add his daily column, Contact junior by writing junior@scoopy.com. Contact Scoopy by writing unclescoopy@msn.com. Contact Tuna by writing tuna@scoopy.com Send submissions to scoopy@scoopy.net

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Tuna
"Diamonds are Forever" (1971)

Diamonds are Forever stars Connery as Bond. In the pre-title sequence, he is trying to revenge the death of his wife by killing Blowfeld. He is then assigned to investigate a diamond smuggling caper, which takes him to Las Vegas via Amsterdam. Once in Vegas, he discovers that his old nemesis, Blowfeld, is behind the smuggling, and has taken over a company from a recluse billionaire patterned after Howard Hughes and played by Jimmy Dean.

We have scenery, action, villains, and three women who show more than usual in a Bond film. Maltin gives it three and a half, and IMDB readers have it at 6.6/10. Berardinelli didn't like it as much, and gave it the dread 2.5 stars. I put it at 3. I enjoyed the Jill St. John character, who was on whatever side looked to be to her advantage. Please excuse the motion blur in the Denise Perrier images. It was a very quick bit of exposure, as bond rips off her bikini top.

  • Thumbnails #1
  • Thumbnails #2
  • Thumbnails #3

  • Denise Perrier (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Jill St John (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)
  • Lana Wood (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    "Women" (1997)

    Women (1997) is a Pan European production filmed in Portugal in French. French title is Elles. It is the story of 5 friends, all women over 40, and poses the question "What do women really want?" It stars 5 of the best known mature actresses in Europe, and gives them all a chance to show their talent. We have Marthe Keller as a divorced woman with two nearly grown children who discovers she is dying. Miou Miou is also an unmarried woman and college professor who has an affair with Keller's son. Carmen Maura plays a TV personality who is doing a feature on her friend's three greatest wishes. Guesch Patti plays a stage performer, and Marisa Berinson plays a lesbian ex addict fashion model.

    One of my favorite scenes has Guesch Patti having sex with an actor on stage when her daughter walks in on her. The daughter tells her she should use a condom. Although this film is slow in places, the strong performances somewhat make up for it, and it has some wonderful moments. Not much is available in the way of on line reviews, and 41 voters at IMDB have it at 7.2/10, which is about right. The exposure is from Miou Miou in a pretty torrid sex scene with the man 25 years her junior. The DVD quality is marginal. It is undersaturated, and has a lot of noise artifacts.

  • Thumbnails

  • Miou Miou (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    "Weird Science" (1985)

    Weird Science (1985) was more fun than I remembered. The premise must be simply accepted. Two unpopular nerds manage to create the woman of their dreams (Kelly LeBrock) with a computer that still uses 5 1/4 disks and an acoustic modem. Lisa (LeBrock) decides to give them enough experience and self-confidence to become accepted at school, and get girlfriends. Anthony Michael Hall is great as one of the nerds. The roles are somewhat more demanding than the normal teen sex romp, in that they have to mature and gain confidence over the course of the film.

    The DVD is well done, and the story is at least as good now as it was in 1985. Maltin hated it at 1 1/2 stars, while Ebert enjoyed it at 3 stars. IMDB voters are in the middle at 6.0. It grossed $16.3M in the US alone, making it the third success in a row for director Hughes. I would have to say of the three, I would put 16 Candles first, Breakfast Club second, and Weird Science third, but all three are keepers.

  • Thumbnails

  • Kelly LeBrock (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
  • Kym Malin (1, 2, 3, 4)
  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
    Three reviews today:

    Lethal Target, a new release this week. A low-budget softcore Czech remake of Alien (a fair amount of nudity), with a mixed Czech and American cast. Sounds good, doesn't it? You betcha!

    A Clockwork Orange, one of the best movies ever made (tons of nudity).

    The immortal screen classic, Gossip, yet another school-age targeted new release this week starring Joshua Jackson (no nudity)

    If you skip the reviews and just get to the pictures, here they are:

  • CC Costigan, "Lethal Target" (1, 2, 3, 4)
  • Petra Kulisek, "Lethal Target" (1, 2)
  • Klara Hlousek and Elisica Rabas, "Lethal Target"
  • Kim Dawson, "Lethal Target"

    Clockwork Orange
    Links #6-10: Virginia Wetherell
    Links #14-19: Adrienne Corri

  • (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)

  • Kate Hudson, "Gossip"
  • Brainscan
    Sophie Favier
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
    Comments by Brainscan:
    Years ago when the aged P subscribed to Cinemax, I saw two late night movies while home from college: they are Frank & I and Venus. Appears that F & I grafted in a scene from Lady Libertine (caps proudly displayed in the Encyclopedia) of Sophie Favier boffing some ugster; and Venus had two lengthy nude scenes of her. Well, I thought I would never see another woman with a bod like Sophie's... and I was damn well right. Thought I would show you what I mean. The first offering is a collage from Venus that I cleaned up and stuck together from stuff on the web. Rest of em are scans from three magazines, for it seems there was a time when Sophie baby made quite a living posing... shall we say provocatively. The last of these is from the stud scanner, Night: all I did to it was clean up a couple of scratches.
    and ...
    Lexa Doig
    (1, 2)
    I was very happy to see these in my inbox today! I first saw Lexa over the weekend when I caught the new Gene Roddenberry series "Andromeda". Kevin Sorbo leads the gang, and let me say that Hercules is no Kirk. But what I saw was much better than I expected. But most importantly, there's Lexa. I guess she's like the Jeri Ryan of this series, meaning that she's revealingly dressed, very sexy, and the real reason to watch to show! The IMDb lists her as one of the main characters of the next Friday the 13th movie ("Jason in Space" or something) So I guess there is some hope for nudity!

    #1 has a bit of see-thru nipple exposure, #2 shows off her petite frame without any goodies. By the way, if anyone has more scans or 'caps, we'd love to see 'em.

    Tracy Neve
    (1, 2, 3)
    For the Page 3 fans...here's is the very buxom 80's P3 babe from the movie "Electric Blue", by UC99. As a bonus, #1 also features some full frontal views as well.
    Jaqueline Lovell
    (1, 2)
    Two new desktop collages of the B-movie babe going full frontal, by Scanman.
    Heidi Klum
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
    From Blackshine...8 cool scans of Heidi from the November edition of the German Amica. These feature Heidi paying tribute to the classic 50's pin ups. #1 is definitely my favorite.
    Heike Makatsch
    (1, 2, 3)
    The vj/talkshow host/celeb-interviewer for the German MTV clone, Viva. Scans by Arthur Figgis.
    Daisy Fuentes A few weeks ago someone emailed me asking if we had 'caps of Daisy from a Bally's Total Fitness tv commercial....Well here ya go! And now I know why you wanted 'em! This is some of the best cleavage I can recall from Daisy! Thanks to DAI for an excellent collage.
    Jessica Alba Personally, I can't get enough of this girl. Plus, I'm very happy that FOX is up to their usual "let's put as much T&A on camera as we can" hijinks with "Dark Angel". I still think the show itself is a little lame, but I'll keep watching to see James Cameron's Alba-nator wearing revealing clothing and kicking butt. Again, thanks to DAI for this excellent collage of 'caps from Tuesday's episode.
    Amy Locane Going topless in "Going all the Way", By Dann.
    Rose McGowan Rose showing off her pasty white boobs in more 'caps from "Going all the Way", by Dann.
    Helen Hunt Wearing what appears to be a heartily padded bra in scenes from "Pay it Forward". by Freakie.
    Jessica Schwarz Another German babe that looks good, but I have no clue who she is. Very nice topless scenes by Celeblover from "JETS - Leben am Limit "
    Jordan A nice pre and post boobs job comparison of the popular model. Thanks to PicCap.
    Anastacia
    (1, 2)
    A Euro Pop Songstress. Supposedly these are some old topless and partial nudes that were taken of her before she became pseudo-famous. Although some folks out there think it's not her. The scans are from the October edition of the French magazine Entrevue. #1 by RVF (with topless exposure) #2 by Petzy.
    Anna Kournikova B&W collage by Scanman. This features the see-thru pic of Anna that appeared here a few days ago. Still no verification of it's authenticity.
    Anna Fachi Another Anna by Scanman. Excellent topless, bottomless, and mostly frontal exposure (you already know what's covered).
    Monica Bellucci Monica appearing partially nude on a movie poster for the the movie "Malèna".
    The Funnies
    Belated Halloween humor
    With Halloween upon us, it is worthwhile to remember a few simple rules to help keep this season healthy, happy and SAFE!! Please use these helpful hints this and every year.

    1. When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it's really dead.
    2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.
    3. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone out.
    4. If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. However, it will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared. This also applies to kids who speak with somebody else's voice.
    5. As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.
    6. Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt. This would apply to any other house of the dead as well.
    7. If appliances start operating by themselves, do not check for short-circuits; just get out.
    8. Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.
    9. If you find a town, which looks deserted, there's probably a good reason for it. Don't stop and look around.
    10. Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you're doing.
    11. If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, kill them immediately.
    12. Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, and Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), anywhere in Texas where chainsaws are sold, the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.
    13. If your car runs out of gas at night on a lonely road, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help. If you think that it is strange you ran out of gas because you thought you had most of a tank, shoot yourself instead. You are going to die anyway, and most likely be eaten.
    14. Beware of strangers bearing tools. For example: chainsaws, staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any devices made from deceased companions.
    15. If you find that your house is built upon a cemetery, now is the time to move in with the in-laws. This also applies to houses that had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic practices.
    16. Dress appropriately. When investigating a noise downstairs in an old house, women should not wear a flimsy negligee. And carry a flashlight, not a candle.
    17. Do not go looking for witches in the Maryland countryside.
    18. If you're searching for something which caused a loud noise and find out that it's just the cat, GET THE HECK OUT!


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