Thursday (Thanksgiving!)

Ski Wolf

2008

OK. It's a skiing comedy. Now that you know that, guess the plot.

If you thought anything else besides "Lovable douches and stoners have to keep snobby rich dudes from taking over the mountain," shame on you. I guess there is no other possible plot for a skiing comedy. I'll bet I've seen ten would-be comedies about skiing and snowboarding, and they all revolve around that very same premise.

This one does have a slight twist to it. One of the lovable losers turns into a werewolf and

spoiler alert.

eventually decapitates and disembowels some of the snobs.

end spoilers

As ski comedies go, this makes that awful one with Tom Green look like an episode of Masterpiece Theater. The acting in this film is so over-the-top that it makes the cast of F-Troop seem like the Royal Shakespeare Company. The bad guy is so one-dimensionally evil that he makes Mr. Burns seem as lovable and sincere as Jimmy Stewart. Except Mr. Burns is funny when he's over-the-top. Trent Zaaga is just hyperactive. If this script had been produced in 1966, Larry Storch would have played Trent's role ...

... and would have been more subtly nuanced.

You haven't heard the worst news. The acting is much stronger than the script. And the script beats the hell out of the production values. If you look at the box below, you can see the gritty realism of the werewolf make-up.

The film does have one thing which we have to consider a positive from the point of view of celebrity nudity: a four minute sex scene involving a woman with freakishly large natural breasts. The woman in question is an adult film star and model named Alix Lakehurst. (And a definite Oscar contender.)

So it has that goin' for it. That's the only positive other than the fact that the ... er ... "film" is only 71 minutes long including the credits on both ends, so the agony is brief ...

... but agonizing.

Here is a Google image search of Alix Lakehurst, if you want to see what I'm talking about

Here's the scene in Ski Wolf. This will also give you an excellent opportunity to see the quality of the acting.

 

IMDb never heard of this, but Amazon has it for sale, if you care to see the info:

I get a commission if you buy it, so you'll know I'm serious when I say, "Do NOT buy it." (Thirty bucks new! Such a deal!) Don't even accept it if someone pays you to take it, because sooner or later somebody will see it lying around and think that you watched it, or worse, that you paid for it.

 

  • * Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

  • * White asterisk: expanded format.

  • * Blue asterisk: not mine.

  • No asterisk: it probably sucks.

OTHER CRAP:

Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

An American Werewolf in Paris

1997

We don't have as many werewolves as some of the Eastern European countries, but we're the only country that will issue them passports. They are some of our most important expatriates because they are just such exemplary ambassadors of goodwill wherever they travel.

This one is again in full HD (1920x1080)

Julie Delpy film clip. (Samples below)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This section will present Defoe's film clips to accompany Charlie's collages, which are found on his own site.

Today's clip: Chloe Monneris in Le Neige au Village

 

 

 

 

 

Notes and collages

Getting into Heaven

1970

Uschi Digard

Group 2 of ?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sexy Movie

(2003)

My favorite fact of the day: when you do a Google Search for Sexy Movie, the top result is a picture of Judi Dench. That little minx! Do you think she purchased that space?

Amber Ambrose film clip (collages below)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Film Clips

Maud Adams in The Girl in Blue. I think this was her first screen nudity. I was a whole decade before Tattoo. Also from The Girl in Blue zip file: Gay Rowan. Samples of both women to the right. Adams is on the top row, Rowan is featured in the others.

Katja Danowski in Herr Lehmann. Samples right.

Nina Franoszek in Martha. Sample right.

Robin Sydney in Garden Party. Sample right.

Demi Moore in The Seventh Sign - not only pregnant, but dubbed into German as well! Sample right.

Daniella Nane in Invisible. Sample right.

Remember that Kim Cattrall thing from yesterday? BBC did a special report on it. And, yes, they brought along a photographer.

Marisa Tomei in Loverboy

Kyra Sedgwick in Loverboy

While we're ogling Kyra, here she is in The Woodsman

France's first in-law, Valeria Bruni-Tedeschi, is here again, today in 5x2