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Tuna
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"Detour"
Detour (2002), which may have had a small theatrical release last year under the name Hell's Highway, has a group of friends in daddies motor home, returning from a rave in the desert, when one of them decides to take a detour to find a secret field of peyote. When they crash, some go for help, some stay behind, and all encounter flesh eating desert dope-heads.
I guess the good and bad thing about it, depending on your point of view, is that it is a retro teen slasher film with lots of gore. It is well photographed, and has good pace. Most of the cast did a great job, with the exception of the male lead, who tried to play a black gangsta rapper type, and was way over the top.
Newcomer Jessica Osfar shows her left breast in an outdoor sex scene. IMDB readers score it 5.5 of 10 based on very few votes, and the few reviews see it as a decent genre effort, somewhat reminiscent of The Hills Have Eyes and Texas Chainsaw Massacre. IF this is your genre, this indie will be a pleasant surprise. C.
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Jessica Osfar
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Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
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Thirteen (2003) One of the audience members at the Sundance premiere
asked Holly Hunter why she agreed to do this low budget project. Her
answer was that the script had an "authenticity" which attracted her.
Already acknowledged as a fine actress, Hunter demonstrated that she's
not a bad film critic either.
I didn't find this a very pleasant watch, but it
certainly did have a freshness of perspective and authenticity about
it. It feels like watching real life. The film really takes a major step toward fusing
valid, commercially-viable dramatic structure with cinema verite. It
is the story of a 13 year old girl, as written by a 13 year old girl
and an auteur. It is, I am certain, not purely autobiographical. The
girl took bits and pieces out of her own life and other lives around
her to try to tell the world what it is like to be a 13 year old girl
and face the inherent peer pressure. The adult co-author brought in
some cohesive storylines. Then the kid got back in the batter's box to
make sure the characters were using the right slang and listening to
the right songs. Voila! Neo-realism. It's all true, in a sense, and
as Ms Hunter noted, "authentic", yet it is a film which can be watched
by mainstream audiences who are consciously in need of a plot and
conflict/resolution.
Plot summary: A good 7th grade girl wants to be
accepted by the cool crowd. Her quest for acceptance leads to a
dangerous, reckless friendship with the "hottest chick in her school",
which leads to experimentation with sex, drugs, lies, shoplifting, and
attitude. Her dysfunctional family struggles to get past their own
problems long enough to see her crisis and (maybe) rescue her.
The film shares a sense of immediacy with the works
of Dogme or cinema verite auteurs, but it is much more polished than
implied by that statement. Although the young girl provided the
details of the characters, music, and atmosphere, the director and
cinematographer used some polished suggestive techniques to shape and
reinforce the storyline, moving to a richer saturation, a full
palette, and softer focus when the young girl is first accepted by
the cool crowd, then desaturating, moving to harsher lighting and a
cooler palette when it all goes sour.
It's a good first movie from Catherine Hardwicke,
doing precisely what independent films probably should do -
personalizing, experimenting, trying to get inside of real characters.
In fact, Ms Hardwicke and Miss Reed (the co-authors) originally
thought they might come up with a teen comedy, but the reality they
uncovered wrote itself as a slice-of-life psychological drama.
Bravo for neo-realism. Whoda thunk that someone
making a movie about a 13 year old girl would ask a 13 year old girl
to be her co-author? Not Hollywood.
There is teen experimentation with drugs and sex,
but no nudity from the teens. The adults also engage in some drug
use and violence. There are some graphic scenes of piercing and
self-mutilation. Holly Hunter does a fairly long topless scene, and
the camera follows her down into a crouch, revealing a brief
frontal.
Young Adam I have not seen this movie,
but one of the male nudity sites had some good caps, and a topless
Tilda Swinton was also in them, so here ya go. Fair warning: Obi-Wan's
ever-present light saber is even more present than usual. This is
the seventh time he's whipped out the ol' wanger on screen. If you
read "Other Crap" religiously, you know that Ewan's light saber will
be cut from the North American release, because Americans just don't
love schwantzes as much as other nations do.
Updates:
OTHER CRAP:
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Gena Lee Nolin was talking to her lawyers yesterday after the NY
Daily News informed her reps that an explicit sex tape was due to
debut on the Internet in the next few weeks. The alleged
participants are Nolin and former hubby Greg Fahlman. Details at
the link.
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The History of Celebrity Sex Tapes, from Joan Crawford to Paris
Hilton. The most interesting thing in the article is that the
famous Marilyn Monroe sex tape - the one Penthouse showed, with
Marilyn on the couch with the mustachioed guy - really is Marilyn.
The "Apple Knockers" one, however, is really Arline Hunter.
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Under pressure from boycott campaigns, Abercrombie & Fitch stores
have stopped selling a controversial catalogue described by family
advocacy groups as pornographic.
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Here is the Abercrombie and Fitch Christmas Field Guide discussed
in the link above
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Jennicam, the first major webcam to attain worldwide notoriety,
will be shutting down after seven years.
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'Too fat' ballerina, all 106 pounbds of her, rejoins Bolshoi
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Once Upon a Dime is dedicated to the comic books of the old days.
Interesting site.
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Budgetair's logo is getting breast implants
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Monty Python Fans Flock to Scottish Castle
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A preview of Mini-me's honeymoon?
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The ten tackiest people of the year.
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some awesome Digital photographs of Scotland. His home page
explains how he stitches his individual photos together with PT
assembler to get panoramic shots.
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Village Voice review of Broadway's "A Very Merry Unauthorized
Children's Scientology Pageant "
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The latest movie phenomenon: Bad Santa was #1 on Monday, and it
isn't even in wide release yet!
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Campbell's Chunky - Click on your favorite NFL team to donate a
can of soup in their name. Check out the voting results.The
Packers sure have a loyal following!
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Dodge plans Lingerie Bowl at Super Bowl halftime
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Lingerie Bowl 2004 - the SuperBowl halftime entertainment
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Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi will be
released by 20th Century Fox on DVD - November 4th, 2004.
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First look at Hugh Jackman's new Van Helsing movie
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Lord of the Rings Movies, Return of the King Official New Movie
Site
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Director Neil La Bute selects the 10 best black comedies
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Create your own Jackson Pollock - just click on "click here to
create art"
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Triumph the Insult Comic Dog Dumps on Clay Aiken in New PETA
Pro-Neutering Ad
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Sex Offender Registration and Community Notification. See if
there are any sex offenders in your area.
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Amazon.com: Our Customers' Advice for additional items if you're
buying Michael Jackson's Number Ones
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Pennsylvania is still looking for a state slogan. Some of my
favorite suggestions:
- Pennsylvania, just a buggy ride from Ohio.
- You're in Pennsylvania. Not That There's Anything Wrong with
That!
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The result of a Google Search for "miserable failure".
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Glen Campbell formally charged in DUI case - with a great
sildeshow of the arrest.
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Which Cartoon Character Are You? I was Pepe le Pew
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Who's Dead, Who's Alive?
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Jailed for Office Gunplay, Man Wants Job Back
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Back to the NBA for the Detroit Pistons Automotion Dance Team
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Jail Babes - Home. Trouble getting a date? If you can wait
from two to ten years, this site may have your answer.
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How Was She in bed? It's a little black book for the internet.
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Forty years of Pirelli calendars, more or less.
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'Reagans' miniseries lifts Showtime's ratings by 80% Given
Showtime's usual ratings, that means 9 people watched instead of
5.
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what would Michael Jackson look like today without all that
surgery?
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Jack Nicholson says he'd like to bed the Mouseketeer, but says
he's too old for sex.
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Match Your Snatch - the perfect gift for that special lady
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The sleaziest Christmas scam ever! - Santa's 900 line.
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Tim Burton says the first film version of 'Willy Wonka' blows
chuck. I guess he's not going to do one of those shot-for-shot
remakes, like Van Sant's Psycho.
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The Film Lineup for Sundance 2004 has been chosen. Here's the
complete list.
Other crap
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
Click
here
to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap
MOVIE REVIEWS:
Here
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
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Brainscan
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'Caps and comments by Brainscan:
On a planet that holds Laetitia Casta and Josie Maran, how is it possible to find another woman who might be our favorite fashion model? Well, she could be a red-head, or at least a strawberry blone. That would help. And she could have legs up to her ears. Would be a plus. And she could take her clothes off... not just once in a while, but all the frigging time. In moview, in magazines, on calendars, on the web. You know, everywhere? All the time?
That would be Amber Smith. Woman loves to get nekkid. Like Kate Moss but with a way better body. Way.
So there's this DVD entitled Amber Smith R.A.W. Got that puppy in the hopes that Amber would get nekkid a lot with the cameras rolling. And I was not diasppointed. Well, not much. I could quibble and ask why they didn't cover one of her butt nekkid photo-shoots, but that would be rude.
The DVD covers. oh I don't know, maybe six photoshoots in which Amber gives up some sort of goodies. After grabbing a couple hundred frames...and that was after I had gone through it once and decided I had to be real picky or else I'd fill up my new 250GB harddrive....I thought it best to stop for a while and compose. Still have 1/3rd of the disk to go and that includes the very best last scene AND a mess of nekkid stills. This is part one, then, with part two showing up whenever I get the daman time to do it.
The Amber Smith-a-thon breakdown:
- Shower scenes, all at least see-thru topless. Links 2-4 also show lower frontal exposure.
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- See-thru and very loose-fitting sarong.
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- Extreme see-thru in a killer white top. The best of these, in my opinion is link #2. The collages in links 5 and
6 are made up of stills.
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- Teeny, weeney bikinis.
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- Fantastic frigging scene, with Amber topless behind an iron fence. My faves are links 10-16. Up close and real personal views of Ambers magnificient upper bod and face. To die for. You just gotta grab these.
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Okay, as a preview, there is a lot more full-frontal wet stuff in part 2, coming soon to a Funhouse in your neighborhood.
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Variety
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Patricia Clarkson |
'Caps by LC of Clarkson topless in scenes from the extremely low budget film (only $300,000!) "Pieces of April" (2003), starring Katie Holmes, Clarkson and Oliver Platt.
The movie was written and directed by Peter Hedges, the writer of "What's Eating Gilbert Grape", "About a Boy". Here's more info, (along with an interesting back story) at the official site by the production company.
Here's the official site by MGM.
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Shelly Marks
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Señor Skin 'caps from the movie "Timequest" aka "Second Chance" (2002). There are some poor reviews at the IMDb, but it might be rent-worthy for a couple of reasons...
1.It co-stars Bruce Campbell
2.Shelly Marks gets nude playing Marilyn Monroe
3.The plot...it's the story of a man who travels back in time and prevents the assassination of President Kennedy and how the world might have been.
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Mail Bag
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Hey Scoops,
One of the babes in the Hip Hop lesbian lovin' series posted yesterday is porn star Cheyenne Silver.
Mr. T
Cheyenne Silver
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